It's like our neighbor with a baby isn't even there.

[teach1rusl]

I'm a serious introvert too (and a bit socially backward...lol). I've joked w/DH about how, if I could have indoor plumbing, I'd be perfectly happy living as a hermit in a cave somewhere up high on a mountain. I lived in my last neighborhood for 5 or 6 years, and only ever learned one neighbor's name, and that's because my son and their's were buddies. I would give a wave if I saw my immediate neighbors out, but never chatted. Had a neighbor stopped by and introduced herself, and maybe invited me over for coffee, I certainly would have been friendly, but there's only a 25% chance I would have gone. BUT, I would have felt good about their attempt, and I probably would have done something nice to reciprocate (if I'd had chickens then, I probably would have sent my son over with eggs and a note). Socializing with people I don't know totally stresses me out...
So maybe SHE is that way??? Personally, I think it would be nice of you to stop by (or send a note) and ask her (and her baby, one less worry for her) over for tea or coffee sometime. Odds are, she won't do it; but I bet it would make at least part of her feel good that somebody noticed or is interested.

 

[Rusty Hills Farm]

Not everybody is social. I know my SIL is not. She ducks any time company shows up and lets my brother handle them. It is her boast that she has not left their farm in 3 years. If they need a repairman for anything and my brother can't be there, I get drafted because SIL will not deal with it. She just says flat out "No way, Jose!" and the appointment gets rescheduled or I get to come meet the repairman. (I live next door.) The only outsider I am aware of her actually agreeing to talk to is the vet and that's only because her horses mean more to her than life itself, but in the 5 years they've lived there I don't think she has ever met or spoken to a single neighbor.

Yeah, it's screwy, but she's an adult and entitled to live however she wants...and that's how she wants to live. My brother just shrugs and says, "Oh, well. You know how she is!" Yet she dotes on her kids and grandkids.

Maybe your neighbor is like my SIL. If she is, don't be surprised if she resents all your efforts to be "neighborly" and just wishes you'd go away and leave her alone.


Rusty

 

[BlackBart]

Maybe she is shy, or not well, suffering from PPD? Maybe he is overbearing or controlling?
Maybe it is nothing at all?
I think it is very nice of you to be so considerate of her. More people should do good deeds.

 

[SallyF]

Quote:
I try not to comment on other people's doings, but that sounds almost like agoraphobia to me. If someone else has to deal with repairmen.... that's pretty far off the map of normal behavior. Just my opinion, I'm no expert, but I'm glad you are her SIL, not me!

 

[redhen]

I would leave them alone.. She just may not be an "outside" person... or maybe she dosent like you..(just kidding!..)... or maybe she hates the heat... or maybe the kid is fussy outside in the heat.... maybe shes like me and simply just does not like being social.... it could be anything...
Not trying to be rude..(I'm really not) ..but really.... none of this should even be a concern to you.
It is nice that you are a concerned neighbor... but ....

 

[Sonoran Silkies]

Quote:
You said what I was trying to say, better than I did.

 

[Sonoran Silkies]

Quote:
Agreed.

 

[HudsonValleyGirl]

I moved in my house a year in August and I just met one of my niebors yesterday. People aren't social anymore.

 

[Tigerjane]

yeah, I've lived on my street since May 14, so about a month and a half now. I only know one neighbor, & only because she came knocking on my door on Thursday when I was expecting a package and I assumed it was the delivery man - or I wouldn't have answered! I don't like most people, and my concern with getting to know the neighbors is that then they'll know more about my doings and perhaps feel they have a right to say things about my dog, my chickens, our yard - whatever. And I don't want to be asked for help either and get pulled into doing things because I feel obligated. Case in point, she asked what I do when we were making small talk on Thursday, and it came up I run a pet sitting business. And she got all excited and asked me to check on her dogs this weekend! Not that I mind, but since we live next door to each other, what if she doesn't like how I care for them or something, and then we're stuck avoiding each other for years? I just don't like to become involved like that. So long story short, she just may not be very social!

 

[Ema]

I didn't read all the posts, so if it had been sugestd already..sorry....I never saw my neighbours whenI moved in around here. Saw the hubby's and the kids maybe once ina blue moon. so what I did was I invited them over for tea/coffee. I put all the info on an invitation card and then rung their door bells and explained what was in the little envelope. I thn expressed how I was really hoping to meet the wife's and the children and that I was hoping our children would play together(this may not apply to you but you could say you will bake some cookies or something for the kids) choose a day and a time during the early afternoon. It worked like a charm for me, and I got one neighbour who is really private and the other neighbours who just love to walk across the huge fieldwitha few beers inhis hand and a bunch of farm fresh peas his wife naggs himt o bring for the kids (the kids hate peas, but right from the bush they love them) good luck!!