Marriage - How did you know he/she was the one?

[Henrietta23]

The day my husband walked passed me in the hallway of the school where we both worked I knew. I called my mother that night and told her I'd seen the man I was going to marry. She asked his name; I didn't know. But I found out and he found out that I found out and 20 years later (almost 19 married) we're still together. I don't know how I knew, but I knew.

 

[mtnhomechick]

After knowing him for ONE week he asked me to marry him........scary huh? I said yes two years later and I told him I was marrying him cause I loved his mom........LOL.

 

[acheeknmanbestfren]

Together 22, married 19. I would do anything for her and she for me. Been that way since the start. Only advice I can give as to whether or not marry the one you're with is gage your level of selfishness. If your outlook is mine or theirs, it's not time.

 

[Rhett&SarahsMom]

Quote:
That's good advice. If you open the door to divorce, someone or something will always be pointing the way for you to go through it, especially The Enemy who hates Marriage.

Whoever mentioned "The Five Love Languages" gave wise counsel. It's a great book. I would also strongly recommend attending a Weekend To Remember and a Love & Respect Conference.

I believe God is the author and Creator of not only Man & Woman but Marriage as well. So obviously I believe one needs to follow His Instruction Manual to have a successful marriage.

Finally, the best advice I ever heard was recently when our pastor said, "When will you know you've found the right one and should get married? Just keep serving God and when He's ready for you to be married, He'll interrupt your service and bring you the right person and you'll know it."

God Bless,

As the child of divorced parent I disagree.
My mom stayed married to my father for much too long. He wasnt physically or mentally abusive. But he was a alcoholic and was cheating on her. But because of the way she was "raised" that you stayed with your spouse no matter what. She went through hell and my sister and I got to see it and had to deal with having an alcoholic father as well. Their getting divorced, and my mom getting told not to come back to the parish we belonged to, were the best things that could have happened to all of us.

Myself. I am on my second marriage. My x was fine until he decided marriage actually wasnt for him and started hanging out with his single buddies in his unit. Then he started not coming home, taking uppers to get through the day. Downers to get through the night. And alcohol to wash the pills down. Then came the other women(whom he brought home)
I hung in there and tried to stay married to him because it was the right thing to do. In the process I lost my self respect and a lot of things that I loved. In the end the only right thing for me to do was to divorce him.

If one believes that "God" will show you the way, then you have to keep your eyes and ears open to ALL possibilities that "he/she" might be showing you. My god doesnt want people, or me to be unhappy or to have to struggle in a relationship that just isnt going to work.
Both people have to be mature. Without that maturity, no matter what your physical/actual age no relationship is going to work or last.

In the end it comes down to happiness. Not consistently because if you are always "happy" then you arent living life.
Life comes with ups and downs. Good times and bad. Anger and forgiveness. It's when the bad things out weigh the good, more than the majority of the time in a marriage, friendship or other relationship that you have to take a long hard look at it and sometimes walk away.

 

[Tailfeathers]

Rhett&SarahsMom :

My god doesnt want people, or me to be unhappy or to have to struggle in a relationship that just isnt going to work.

That one sentence pretty much sums up what Marriage is all about. Either you believe and trust that there is One True God who created all things including all people and marriage, either one believes that they are a creation made in God's image - or one creates God in their image to make "him/her" whatever they want Him to be.

"There is a way that seems right unto a man and that way leads to death."

"Lean not on your own understanding but in ALL your ways, acknowledge Him and He will direct your paths."

God hates divorce. Period. The only reason He ever "allows" it is in the case of ongoing, unrepented, physical sex outside of the marriage. In the end, when everything is over and done with, there is ONLY one thing that will matter when we stand and give an account of our lives before the Lord Jesus Christ and that is what we did in obedience to Him. The ONLY thing that will matter is what did we do with Jesus? Did we choose His way or our way?

And that comes from a man who is alone right now at home taking care of everything because his wife has chosen to believe the lie that "God doesn't want me unhappy."

Oh, and in case anyone is wondering, there was NO adultery, NO abuse, and No Scriptural justification whatsoever for her leaving. Rather she has chosen to give up the Eternal Rewards that may have been for the short-lived happiness she may find her on Earth.

So I say again, God is the Creator of all things and that includes marriage. When anyone gets something and they want to know how to make it work and get all they can out of it, they can try to wing it themselves or they can go to the Instruction Manual which was given to the User by the Creator. The same is true with Marriage. One may think they are getting all they can out of a Marriage and one may be content with what they have but unless it is God-Centered and being lived out according to the Instruction Manual, one is missing out on all that they could have gotten.

God Bless,​

 

[twotmama]

He had me from HELLO!

 

[mrsengeseth]

I knew because I could see our future in his eyes. I knew the moment we started dating. I told my mom i'd marry him someday. We had thatconnection from the begnning. and even while dating people mistook us for a married couple, which was kinda funny because we were in highschool. Our friends knew we were to be together from then on.

He knew because I told him so.

 

[Run-A-Muck Ranch]

How did I know Jason was the one......

























The first night I meet him he handed me his wallet and there were 2 drink tickets in it...No money, but those 2 drink tickets were it...

Just kidding...Well really I'm not, he did only have 2 drink tickets and no money....but what else was I suppose to say!!!! PLUS he handed me his WALLET...What more could I have asked for...

 

[Rhett&SarahsMom]

Quote:
That one sentence pretty much sums up what Marriage is all about. Either you believe and trust that there is One True God who created all things including all people and marriage, either one believes that they are a creation made in God's image - or one creates God in their image to make "him/her" whatever they want Him to be.

"There is a way that seems right unto a man and that way leads to death."

"Lean not on your own understanding but in ALL your ways, acknowledge Him and He will direct your paths."

God hates divorce. Period. The only reason He ever "allows" it is in the case of ongoing, unrepented, physical sex outside of the marriage. In the end, when everything is over and done with, there is ONLY one thing that will matter when we stand and give an account of our lives before the Lord Jesus Christ and that is what we did in obedience to Him. The ONLY thing that will matter is what did we do with Jesus? Did we choose His way or our way?

And that comes from a man who is alone right now at home taking care of everything because his wife has chosen to believe the lie that "God doesn't want me unhappy."

Oh, and in case anyone is wondering, there was NO adultery, NO abuse, and No Scriptural justification whatsoever for her leaving. Rather she has chosen to give up the Eternal Rewards that may have been for the short-lived happiness she may find her on Earth.

So I say again, God is the Creator of all things and that includes marriage. When anyone gets something and they want to know how to make it work and get all they can out of it, they can try to wing it themselves or they can go to the Instruction Manual which was given to the User by the Creator. The same is true with Marriage. One may think they are getting all they can out of a Marriage and one may be content with what they have but unless it is God-Centered and being lived out according to the Instruction Manual, one is missing out on all that they could have gotten.

God Bless,

"God" is not the answer for everything, to everyone. And I cant imagine he/she wanting someone to stay in an unhealthy relationship.

The powers I believe in know that I am a good person and that I wasnt meant to be with my first husband.
I WAS meant for the man I am now married to and have a great child with.
If I had remained married to my first husband I would not be happy, healthy or have my child. I might well be dead, on welfare or homeless.

I know "god" approves of my divorce. And many others.

But then again my god is a forgiving and understanding god. Not the one I grew up being preached to about. One that I would have needed to obey and be afraid of. Not one created by man.

 

[sugarbush]

My wife and I met at work; over a traction cart actually. For those of you who don't know what a traction cart is it is a cart that holds all the ropes and weights for use when somebody is put in traction.

She asked what it was, I made an inappropriate comment that involved tieing her up with the rope and we had our first date a week later.

We got married 6 months after that and have been married 6 years now. I think communication is key. We are both from devorced families and we told each other going in that we would check in every now and then and make sure we were still happy....we do that about once a week and so far so good. We both are fully aware that if we take each other for granted that this will never work so we make an effort to appriciate what each other does on a day to day basis.

I still haven't gotten to tie her up though....