OK to my MI. friends. I hope you don't mind me sharing this. It is NOT something I am proud of. However I am sharing in hopes of helping others and I really hope each and everyone of you will read it.
OK I am going to talk very serious about something. I hope that EVERYBODY will PLEASE read this even if you don't like my posts.
I am sharing this information in hopes that it may help someone. It is not intended for any other purpose.
If by chance you notice changes in yourself or someone around you. PLEASE DO NOT just pass it off. Try to determine a cause. Now more specifically what I am talking about is mood / emotional changes. There could be an underlying cause that could be solved very easy but if left unchecked could be terrible.
OK so I guess about the only way I know how to relay this is to jump under the bus. Please try to understand that I am only doing this in attempt to help others and maybe in that some may have a better understanding of me, especially those who have met in person.
OK so here is my point. If you notice changes give a good look at things such as MEDICATIONS !!!!
See I had been on a med for NARCOLEPSY (a sleep disorder) then 9/2010 the Dr. changed that med. I was OK with that. Well I had been on a downhill spiral since. I really didn't know how bad or the cause until last week. See I ran out of that med and while waiting was forced to go back to the original. Now this is the part that is embarrassing but I feel the need to share just so others can see what kinds of things can happen and hopefully help others. See on the med I started 9/2010 I had reached the point where simple little things like just reading certain posts would cause me to become teary. I am sure many who have met me may have noticed and wondered what the heck! I was also struggling with other VERY bad thoughts nearly daily. I have now been back on the "old" med for one week. No Tears No VERY bad thoughts. My point is PLEASE if you or someone around you seems to be having problems of this nature PLEASE get help /try to help them. I was VERY LUCKY that I had a couple of AWESOME friends who on more than one occasion helped me through melt downs. While they were there for me. They didn't know me before so it was hard for them to do much more than be very supportive and I am so thankful to them for that.
I truly hope that nobody else goes through this kind of thing but I hope that this post may shed some light and maybe help others to catch things like this earlier than I did.
Hopefully you will soon see a better (more like) the "old" me that most of you don't know!
Rob
Absolutely! Better living through chemistry. Meds. can mess you up... and so can the dr.'s prescribing them... and the patients taking them. Several years ago I blew my nerves (the best way I can describe it). I was desperate for some relief. My dr. began prescribing every psych med under the sun. Nothing worked and worse, most made things worse. Some knocked me out, one prevented me from walking; then there were hot flashes, restless leg syndrome, tremors, ticks, and suicidal thoughts. I was starting to wish I could be committed while taking them so I wouldn't have to be responsible for the household while medicated. I even had MRI's done when I started getting painful muscle spasms, AFTER I quit a medication, to make sure it didn't damage my brain. Very dangerous stuff. My dr. was getting very frustrated with me too, that *I* was consciously acting so sensitively towards the meds. She even referred me to a psychiatrist... who in turn told me I was fine and to drop my dr. because she was, essentially, going to kill me. That was my warning, right there and I didn't run with it. It was a hard one because we'd been through so much, to have to start over with a new dr. when I was feeling so rotten... so I stuck with her even though I knew I shouldn't and dreaded going in. I would almost take full responsibility for that bad decision but what my Dr. did next makes me reconsider. She got fed up with me
complaining about the effects of the medications and my
inability to stick with them. I was, after all, afraid to quit medications, let alone try new ones and yet I was still going to her for help. She gave me a very stern talking-to, changed directions, told me I had fibromyalgia and gave me one more to try. It was weird, sent up a red flag that I ignored, but I sucked it up and tried it. I was determined to stick it out at all costs, not to complain or be wimpy about it and to FEEL BETTER! Optimism would rule the day!
...Soooooooo...naturally, a couple of weeks later, I felt like I was going to die. I felt so ill. I was out to lunch with my kids, MIL and her FIL. It was so bad and yet so vague, I went into the bathroom and crouched on the floor, not knowing if I was going to pass out or just die for whatever reason. Do you call 911 and tell them you just feel like you're going to die? I certainly didn't want to call my dr. and say so but that's what I decided to do. I have three kids and a husband to take care of. So I called her from my cell phone before I even left the restaurant and went straight there with my kids in tow, snowstorm that day too - I'll never forget. She took my BP and her jaw dropped. It was through the roof! Normally my bp is very low, almost to a fault. That med was dropped immediately and another added to bring the bp down and they sent me to a cardiologist for a battery of tests. Turns out that med wasn't approved for "mood disorder" but only for fibromyalgia and she wanted me to try it because it was known to help those suffering from anxiety and depression, etc. I didn't drop her, I didn't sue her, I didn't even leave the practice but she wouldn't see me after that, wouldn't even make eye contact in passing. I only saw her nurse practitioner who never ever pressured me into taking a medication. I still have issues with my nerves too, that I haven't been able to solve entirely. We moved so I don't go there anymore anyway. I have a new dr. who is understandably very cautious with me and I love her for that.
Yeah, I also like people to know what I went though with medications. I wish someone had stopped me from going to that dr., stopped that cycle before she nearly killed me. Nobody should have to go through that. I'm not out for personal gain, for lawsuits or even ruining her practice over it. I'm positive her intentions were good but that she didn't know when to quit, that she believed she could solve
anything with her arsenal of medical magic. Just like I didn't know when to quit and that she had
something up her sleeve that could help.
Medications can be dangerous.
