My creepy Schwans man....am I just overreacting?

[star123]

You have been given lots of good ideas. But thats all they will be if you dont act on them. By your posts and inactions i can see you frightened and scared. You MUST take some form of action. Not to scare you more. But if some thing did happen and your fears hadnt been recorded before. you would have less prof that it was him. And they would be less action taken.

I work with law enforcement i do armed security. And we are told to report ANY and EVERY thing that comes up. to protect our selfs and our charges.

Small example, i had to remove physically a guy once. he threaten to kill myself and/or other officer. If i hadn't reported it. when guy came back other officer could of been killed or hurt. As no one would of known to look for that suspect. He did come back when i was their, but turned out it was to apologize for his prior actions. He asked other officer for me. but as officer knew to watch for him. when he called for me. he also warned me who it was, so i was able to have firearm ready in case of defense. This time nothing happened. But their have been others for myself and other officers.

Law enforcement wont be able to do anything to the guy. But, if its in records that you feel he is threatening you or otherwise. They at that time can do more. "HATE the fact that some thing HAS to happen before they can do anything."

But important things is you record what happens and when. so they can see prof and a profile. Hindsight is worthless in this case so please take action and protect yourself BEFOREHAND. Could be he is just odd. Or could be he is a threat. If he isn't then you just overacted and no big deal. But if he is and you do nothing.... You could be putting yourself at risk.

Don't wish to scare or intimidate you. but in my field i have seen lots of mistakes and regrets made. And do not wish to see you as one. Remember its not just you at risk. Think of how husband would feel if some thing happened while he was away. he would feel guilty and responsible. Also others on your route could be at risk also.

Finial choice is yours. Either way, please make a choice and take action in some way. If you know a friend/familily member who could stay with you for bit. that would be good. dont say they their couse your scared. say THEY choose to come visit as hadnt hung out in long time or some thing. Don't show fear


Wish i was near you i'ld play body guard and chase him off. A female friend went threw similar and no action was taken. and i will always feel guilty.

 

[jvls1942]

are you listening? this was written by a trained officer.. did you see the precautions they took??

I agree. You have had a wealth of suggestions to choose from.. Pick one (or none) and DO something.

 

[PortageGirl]

Well, I have to say that I have chatted with my SIL whose mom used to get Schwan's super regularly, and she and I and another friend who've all ordered from them over the years that all this seems very out of character for the company in general.

None of us have ever had trouble, drivers have been friendly enough, but really too busy to do more than deliver our goods, get our orders, and chat just enough to be courteous, and get going to their next stop.

All that is why I have said I’d report the issue to the company, because it really seems like an anomaly to me and those I’ve talked to around here. We all live in a rural area where Schwan’s has been a treasure for years. It sounds like there’s either a case of a bad apple in this one guy, a manager who isn’t screening properly, or maybe it’s a regional issue, and the company would really care, cause they’re a good company that can ill afford to ignore this sort of thing.

As I've said in every post I've made in this whole thread though, luvmy and all the rest of us too, have to handle this sort of thing in the way that's best for each of us. I have confidence that in my region, I could safely call the company... that's all I'm saying.

 

[luvmychicknkids]

I appreciate what you are saying, star123, but I really don't see that what I am doing qualifies as "inaction". No, I have not reported him, but I wasn't acutally threatened. If I HAD been, he would not have left my property before the police were called. What he said was creepy, but not a threat. I bought a new gun, one I know how to use, and would be more than willing to blast away anyone or anything that came inside my home and was a danger to my children or myself. I was creeped out by him when it happened, but with my new back-up I feel much more comfortable. I doubt he would ever give me cause to use it. However, considering people have their homes broken into all the time by people with the intent to harm, there COULD be an occasion for me to use it. the only "inaction" is my indecision on reporting something I an not 100% sure needs reported. Perhaps he is a danger, but perhaps he simply has the worlds worst people skills??? I am going to make a decision on that, however, and will take the action I decide is warranted. Talking to my neighbors about their experience with him will help me make that decision.

Again, I do appreciate what you are saying, but rest assured, I am not some scared woman, sitting here shaking, waiting to be victimized.

 

[speckledhen]

I know you're no victim, however, though it may sound cynical, you probably shouldn't give him the benefit of the doubt (bad people skills). Your gut is screaming, so I'd say that is what you should go with.I'm always regretting it when I dont go with my gut feeling. I really hope this works out and you never have to deal with this man.

 

[star123]

Sorry the word i used was incorrect. Didn't mean "inaction" as you doing nothing. I was referring to it in a official manner. By contacting Law Enforcement or company liaison. Some one in position to preform action on your behalf. A guy is great "in right hands " but useless if in other room. I have firearms here to. But unless i always answer door with it on me. If i can't reach it doesn't help. Also A fire arm isn't always answer. "odd response from me i know lol" Because it can be used against you. I've had to take weapons form people before. Physically once before "lucky for me only once". but they can be taken from you. Also firing on a person is alot different then an animal.

I do not wish to sound like im down grading you. Or your abilities to defend yourself. I'm sure you are capable of protecting your self. But ive seen trained professionals get taken better of. And i've had people get drop on me before.

Do not wish to belittle your actions or abilities. Just doing all i can over this medium to help you stay safe. I used to think i could handle anything ". but life has shown me their are always surprises you can't prepare for.

Just giving you options and personal experiences to try and assist you. Also not all "threats" come spoken prior. Well i wish you all the best and safety. And hope all goes well for you.

Also when/if you report it. don't have to say you where threaten. Can also say you "felt" threatened or insulted. can say it could be a misunderstanding, but how you took his statements and actions as some thing they worried you.

 

[ji]

star123 she appears to be old enough to know what you told her
"A guy is great "in right hands but useless if in other room."

haha love a good typo

 

[luvmychicknkids]

Quote:
Honestly, I have to confess, I was thinking (with my husband in Turkey) that should read "A guy is great in the right hands but useless if in another Country" LOL I laughed quite a bit over that rather risque typo.

 

[deb1]

I have noticed on this thread that some people are wondering why the Original poster hasn't informed her husband. A lot of military spouses do not tell the military member the problems at home. This isn't just because they don't want the military person to worry about problems that they can't solve but also because overseas can be a dangerous place. No one wants the soldier to be so concerned with home problems that he or she endangers themselves or others. Remember some soldiers overseas are in harms way, getting shot at. My own husband was in a base that was considered pretty safe in Afghanistan but he still endured rocket firing against his base. A helicopter that he had previously flown in was shot down and everyone killed.


I am not saying yes, or no to telling her husband, just trying to give a different perspective. There is no right or wrong decision about informing her spouse.

Military spouses really don't get enough credit for the support that they give.

 

[luvmychicknkids]

Quote:
Thank you for that.

Even though my husband is "just" in Turkey, it is one of the less safe areas of Turkey, and honestly, these days I don't even feel totally safe when he is stateside. He is my best friend and I generally share every detail of life with him. Even when we are apart, most decisions are made by both of us. But once in a blue moon, I come across soemthing I KNOW I can handle that could not possibly benefit any of us if I told him. As much as he protects me, I try my best to protect him, too.