Need advice re: Horse

[australorpchick]

I need advice please. I'll try to make this as short as possible.

I've always dreamed of owning a horse. I was given a free horse (as free as a free horse can be) last May. She is now 3 and is an Appendix (TB X Quarterhorse). She had very little training when we received her. She is now halter trained, can walk on a lead line, basic lunging and picks up her front feet. She's still so-so with her back feet. She's boarded at a facility 10 minutes from my house and I pay $240.00/mo for pasture board w/ 2-a-day feedings.

My horse unfortunately is kind of skittish. Yesterday, she broke off the 10" diameter post that she was tied to for dinner (the wood broke, not the line), for who knows what reason. I was there at the time, there was no large noise, large animals, or any other reasonable explanation.

I have now received within a weeks time, advice from both the stable owner and my farrier, that I should get rid of this horse and get an older horse that is already broke and calm. Neither of them knew that the other had told me this. They feel to be adequately trained, that she would need to go to a full-time training facility that would cost upwards of $600/mo and would probably need at least 6 months. I honestly can't afford this. I just took a paycut due to the current economy and just recently moved her to this facility from one that I was questioning the quality of care of, which resulted in the doubling of my boarding fee. I have no problem paying the boarding, the vet bills and the cookie bills, I just don't happen to have $3,600+ lying around without breaking into the funds we've set aside for emergencies or job loss.

They both feel that I will get injured if I do eventually try to ride this horse, which even with training won't be for at least 2 years from now. I have to admit that there is no way in heck I would let me daughter ride her, ever. She is a beautiful horse and is well-behaved (most of the time), but I think she needs a more experience horseowner who can train her or someone who has the disposable funds to send her to be trained. With me, she just might end up a bored lawn ornament, who gets brushed and walked a lot.

What surprises me is that after speaking to my husband, both daughters and my dad, I am the only one upset about selling her and getting another horse. When it comes to people, I am very no nonsense and do not get emotional, however, when it comes to animals I am a complete marshmellow. I'm feeling very guilty.

Am I doing the right thing selling her to a more experience person and buying an older, broke horse?

 

[valmom]

Yes, you are considering the right thing.

The saying goes- green on green adds up to black and blue. I have had horses for the last 48 years and raised and broke out some- it is NOT for the inexperienced or the faint of heart. Even the best intentioned youngster will do stupid stuff and test and test and test you to see if the rules have changed yet. It is really easy to let youngsters get spoiled, too. (mine are- but they are mine, and spoiled in ways I can tolerate)

It makes a lot of sense for you and your family to have a well broke older horse who has "been there done that" to learn on. In this economy, you may even find a wonderful older horse who is still sound with a great mind for free. Maybe look into trading your youngster for one who is more useable. And then you can ride NOW instead of 2 years from now for the cost of your board.

 

[luvarabhorses]

If you like the horse, you can do this. You just have to put everything in very small steps. Like, you need to get a rubber innertube, tie your mare to it and leave her there. Next step would be to get a bull snap on the lead line, tied to the inner tube and purposely add some scarey things to the mix, She needs to learn once she is tied, she sits there until you say otherwise. If you spend a lot of time with her and enjoy it, you will enjoy training her.
If you are so so about the horse= get a broke one, there are many many out there now.

 

[luvarabhorses]

I guess I say this because I broke 10 of my horses and it was very easy. It was also very rewarding. I am a big fan of Chris Cox and if you can get a hold of any of his videos, used or otherwise- you should. Tommy Garland is also very good, he actually broke my stallion, Nonsuch Padron, when he was just starting out.
You need to focus on making your mare as bombproof as possible, brave in any situation, and not shield her from anything. Kenny Harlow used to say that parents give their kid a pony and a million instructions on what NOT to do around the pony. The kid, being a kid, ignores all of them and by the end of the first summer it is the most broke pony on earth.

 

[turney31]

Trade her for a broke horse. You will Be doing both of you a favor. She also deserves a knowledgeable trainer. You will absolutley fall in love with your new horse that can be trusted as a family friend. Been there done that! good luck, Micah

 

[bantamsrus]

I would get yourself a good broke horse for your first horse. You need a postive experience for yourself so you can become confident in yourself and that will help you become more confident working with the horse. If you can scrounge up some extra cash once in a while (most of us are feeling the pinch, we hear you) take some training lessons. Then, maybe, your next horse can be a little younger, greener, and you can train that one with some assistance. It is very rewarding to train your own horse and that special bond with it!!!

 

[CountryMom]

See, I am probably going to get nailed for this, but please please remember that a horse is LIVESTOCK that is VERY large and dangerous. Emotional attachment is something everyone goes through and we all do so with our chickens. Some of us have them as pets and some as livestock. However, you cannot put human emotion and treat a horse like a pet. It is too large to treat like a puppy and too dangerous to think human around a horse verses knowning horse language.

Please, do yourself and your family a favor and find an older well trained horse with lots of been there done that. Put a price on yourself and your family members that may be riding such a horse on how much you feel you are worth. Then find a reasonable middle. Like I always get the question of I want a kid horse for $500! Come on. That is a once in a life time happening (if the horse is really a good true honest kid horse) and personally my kids are worth WAY more than $500 in my book.

Your horse is dangerous and with your lack of experience your stable owner and farrier know this. They are not being mean, or hurtful, they really do care about this situation. Or they would have recommended you find a trainer or give you advise only on training it. Speaking from experience as I have had so many new horse owners call me with unbroke or dangerous horses and ask me to help them. Most times it is to tune up or get the horse presentable for sale and then find an older good riding horse. Seen too many accidents and too many hurt folks that didn't know better and wished someone would have told them to get a different horse.

Look at it as you will be looking for a new partnership and selling or giving away this horse will only lead to a better one you can enjoy so much more. Training horses isn't for everyone and isn't easy at all for everyone either.

 

[Suellyn]

It seems to me that you would absolutely, positively be doing the right thing for your situation: your experience level, your goals, and the fact that you want your children to be able to ride, seem pretty incompatible with this horse, ESPECIALLY in the short term.

Can the horse be trained? Absolutely. Can she turn out to be a great horse someday? Probably...BUT as a general rule of thumb: inexperienced horses need experienced owners/trainers, and inexperienced owners need experienced horses.

It is also of concern to me that 2 experienced "horse people" seem to see a mismatch in the situation. They are THERE, and I'm sure acting in the best interest of you AND the horse.

Not only is it in the best interest of you, your daughters, your finances, and your SAFETY, but it is in the best interest of the horse as well. The older she gets, the more ingrained some of these undesirable behaviors will become, and her chances of rehoming/resale get lower and lower.

Right now she just sounds young & untrained & a bit high-strung; a lot of experienced horse people will be able to deal with this pretty easily. BUT if this progresses to a downright dangerous or explosive animal, it is going to be really, really hard to find a good situation for her.

I think an older, experienced horse would be a joy for your family to own & ride, and that your current horse would really benefit from an experienced owner.

Good luck!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

 

[ThreeBoysChicks]

I have to agree. I have been around horses forever. Two years ago, I purchased a gorgeous Registered Paint mare from a dealer. I rode her in his indoor arena but never outside. Se came here and the first time I tried to ride her (outside) she went nuts and I was thrown not once but twice and stepped on the second time. Being thrown from a horse when you are 18 is a whole lot easier than when you are 39. The dealer took her back, seems she was never ridden outside. It took his training weeks to get her comfortable riding outside and was then sold as a brood mare because she was too skittish.

After her, I had a beutiful Quarter Horse gelding. He was great, but could not be trusted with anyone who was not an experienced rider. I sold him because I need to be able to trust him around anyone.

I purchased a retired ranch horse, awesome tempermant and safe for anyone to ride (Duncan).

I purchased a Belgian. I always wanted one. Yes, she is 17.2 hands and a big girl. But she rides great. She can be trusted around anyone and I absolutely enjoy every minute of time I spend with her. She was not use to having her feet picked up, but with time, she stands great for our farrier now.

I tell you this, because there are tons of horses available these days. Free to a good home all over the place. So find yourself one that you can trust and enjoy. Make sure you ride it outside and see how it reacts to various situations. Becasue of the economy, it really is the buyers market in many areas including horses. If you are not comfortable, don't get it. You will have sooo much fun. So find that perfect horse and be safe. But remember, as CountryMom said, they are large and can be dangerous. While I love my horses, I always have one eye on them. Good Luck finding a great horse.

Just to share, here is a picture of mine.

Chantilly

Duncan

'

So you can understand their size difference. He is 15.2 hands and she is 17.2 hands

 

[arlosmine]

I have been a full-time horse trainer for over twenty-five years and feel that you should pay attention to the fact that so many people with more experience than you have independantly advised that this is not the right horse for you. While she may be trainable by SOME ONE, she is not trainable (safely) by you with the knowledge you curently have, nor does it sound like you can afford to get her trained by some one else. The issue is not whether she is a nice horse or not- the issue is that she is not the right horse for YOU.

It is wonderful that you are concerned about her well-being: Consider that inexperienced handling can confuse and scare horses, creating behavioral problems that follow them through out their lives and seriously impact the handling the horse recieves by humans. Scared and confused horses hurt people. Hurt enough people and poor treatment by humans is often the result. If you want to do what's best for THE HORSE, get her in the hands of an experienced horseman so she can get a good education, grow up and have a good future.

Do not rely on videos to keep you safe, or teach you how to train. They are great tools, but not a primary source of education for a person without much prior experience with a potentially dangerous situation. I use them to re-enforce what the students learn in lessons.

There are many, many nice safe horses on the market right now for great prices, some for free. You can have fun THIS SUMMER on one of them- so can your daughter. Find this mare a new home (please do not give her to an enthusiastic unsupervised teen-ager) and give a safer horse a great home.

Your mare can be happy with some one else, just like you can make another horse happy. You just need to get the right match for all concerned.

I hope this helps, I have seen your situation MANY. MANY times- I hope you can benefit from my experience.

good luck,
Michelle