Need some advice on a friendship issue...

[herfrds]

No idea of how long it takes. It depends upon the persons.

I'm still waiting.

Don't let her throw you into a guilt trip with that "be the better person" garbage.
Just stay away.

 

[chickaddict]

"be the better person"


Sounds like you already are. It is time for your "friend??" to stop relying on you.

 

[BunnyMomma]

Let her go.
I had to let a friend go 5 years ago. It hurt so good!

I never knew how much stress I was under until she was gone from my life. I thought she was my best friend, but I realized she was just using me. She was a good time friend. When everything went her way, life was good. I was too good to her. When I needed her, she wasn't there.

I really don't miss her! I have moved to a more positive place in my life, and I am glad that I moved on.
Happy Trails!
Bunny

 

[churchx3]

I have kept this for several years now, and it is so true.
________________________________________________________________


"Life is a Theatre" - Invite your audience carefully.

Not everyone is spiritual or emotionally healthy enough to have a
front row seat in our lives. There are some people in your life that are
best loved from a distance. It's amazing what you can accomplish when
you let go, or at least minimize your time in draining, negative,
incompatible, pointless relationships, friendships, and fellowships!
Consider your current relationships.

Pay attention to who lifts and who leans? Who encourages and who
discourages? Who is on a path of growth and who is going down fast?
When you leave certain people, do you feel better or worse? Who always
has drama?

The more you seek God and godly things, the more you seek quality; the
more you seek not just the hand of God but the face of God, the more
you seek things honorable; the more you seek growth, peace of mind, love
and truth around you, the easier it will become for you to decide who
gets to sit in the FRONT ROW and who should be moved to the balcony of your life.

You cannot change the people around you, but you can change the people
you are around! Ask God for wisdom and discernment and use these
gifts to choose the people who sit in the front row of your life.

 

[BunnyMomma]

Thank you for sharing that! I will keep that near me for future reference. It is so true and elequently stated.
God Bless you!

Bunny

 

[Mattemma]

With all the help you have given you sound more like a parent than a friend.She is draining you emotionally and you are better off moving on. I do feel sorry for the child.

It is one thing when a person is leaving a crap relationship to make a better life for her kids.My mom did and yes some people stopped talking to her.I guess they could not deal with the fact that their freind(my dad) beat her, so forgetting her was easier.You have been a good friend above and beyond,but in return you get stressed out.Be busy and no more helping her.If you really never want to see her again just tell her what you said here and then move on. Besty wishes for you and her!

And not to be so anti-man,but why can't she see the need to take a break from ALL MEN and get her life together FIRST for the sake of her child?

 

[joebryant]

You and your friend and your friend's friends should all go on the Jerry Springer show and make some money.

 

[vfem]

Well, I hope its not that dramatic!?

Honestly, its one of those quiet situations... we just don't talk about it.

And the thing is she is a good friend, you can't judge that off this one bad year with her, out of 16 years she has been exceptionally needy lately... more so then shes been before. We lived together in college for a couple year when we were both single. We've both had our moments. I then met my now husband, and she met her daughter's father and we both moved out. 2008 we bought a house outside of the city, and March 2009 they bought a house near us. We really did care a lot for each other's family.

Right now I'm just not answering her calls. I don't want to, but I need my space right now. My family is the most important thing to me, I don't want to deal with high school silliness.

I guess the best part is the fair in the next 2 weeks and I'm doing so much with the state fair for work and competition, that its AWESOME I won't be around much. I can go hang out with my family and eat fried things!!!

 

[wildeflowers]

Quote:
I could have written your post BunnyMomma and i completely agree.

It sure is freeing.

 

[vfem]

I told her by text today that I need my space. I just can't deal with her right now.

And she's pretty much fine with it. Which of course hurts. I tried to just shrug it off, but now I can't sleep thinking about how I'm not just that important. I haven't talked to my husband about it, I know if I did he'd give me the reassurance I need to relax a bit, but he came home so tired, he fell sleep before I could tell him what was up. I'm so drawn out and tired... but too sad to sleep...