Old Boyfriend Looking for ME!

[al6517]

Quote:
I agree with redhen, it sounds as though you are looking to stir something up before you even know what the deal is. From another guy's point of view if you parted on good terms and were friends attending each others weddings, he may just be looking to say Hi how ya doin. I don't agree with the fact that when you are feeling guilty about something you seek the advice of the old Hens club instead of your Husband, if your relationship with your husband is as secure as you say or think, then what is the problem asking him what he thinks, he may be fine with it. But will you chew his head off if he thinks otherwise. I smell a rat and a scheme brewing with your antic's, if your not good at this game you may need to back out.

AL

 

[horsejody]

I would make sure that DH knows that he tried to contact you. Then I would send him a nice note telling him about your current life and how you hope that he is as happy as you are. Then sign the note with your name and DH's. Then there are no hurt feelings, nobody was shunned, nobody gets jealous, and everybody was part of it. There are no secrets. No old flames get renewed or get their hopes up.

 

[NGT ANGL]

Quote:
very wise advice horsejody

 

[sred98]

Quote:
Sounds like you handled the situation with your DH correctly. Keep us updated on how the contact went!

Shelly

 

[aussieheelr]

Ignore. If you had stayed in touch that would be one of my favorite lines ever, "Carefull there. You dig up the past and all you get is dirty." -Minority Report.
It may just start out as innocent but there is always that chance... just avoid the possibility. Sounds like playing with fire to me, slitting hair. You married your husband for a reason.

 

[mrsengeseth]

I agree with jody.

 

[fasbendera]

Great idea telling your hubby. My DH girlfriend before me sent him a X-Mas card at work. I put all our cards up on a wall or post during the holiday season so I grabbed this card that was on top of the recycle pile thinking he had tossed it my mistake. Here is was from her and the address was to his work not our home which he had lived in long before I dated and married him and he lived in while dating her. I just told him I found the card in the recycling and it was hanging up and if M_______ wanted to play she was welcome to come over and play with his whole family we would love to have company over.

I guess my point is that your intentions are clear that you are in a rock solid loving relationship. Just let the XBF know that your husband was glad to hear from him also and you would both like to catch up with him. Kepping hubby in the loop and maybe even cc: him on all emails and forwarding all replies will keep the XBF's feet firmly planted in the present.

 

[littlefarm_bighappy]

Nope, no way, nada. After 20+ years of marriage your husband deserves loyalty and devotion. This is time and energy well spent on the ones you love, not ones from the past.

Also, the fact that this is from SO FAR BACK disturbs me a little bit. Honestly, I would think this guy is a little imbalanced to go to such lengths to find you- it may seem flattering but to me I'd have one hand on speed dial for a restraining order.

I'd really hope my hubby would the same for me.

 

[horsejody]

Quote:
You never know why someone from the past would contact you. The reason might be quite unexpected. A couple of years ago a person tried similar ways to find me. It was a girl I knew years ago. I had no idea why she suddenly wanted to communicate with me. I did contact her. I was glad I did. A dear childhood friend of mine had passed away from cancer, and she wanted to make sure I knew.