Puns. LOVE them.

[PineappleMama]

They say sarcasm is the recourse of the weak mind... but darned if you don't have to be pretty quick to fling one off that fast off the top of your head!

My son laughed for MONTHS over this lame one...

Why doesn't my car ever need a bathroom?







...Because it's backed up.

I so regretted that one... he found it entirely too funny and told it over the dinner table for MONTHS.

 

[Catstar68]

A baby seal walks into a bar. "What can I get you?" asks the bartender. "Anything but a Canadian Club," replies the seal.

Two vultures get ready to board an airplane, each carrying two dead raccoons. The stewardess looks at them and says, "I'm sorry, gentlemen, only one carrion allowed per passenger

These friars were behind on their belfry payments, so they opened up a small florist shop to raise funds. Since everyone liked to buy flowers from the men of God, a rival florist across town thought the competition was unfair. He asked the good fathers to close down, but they would not. He went back and begged the friars to close. They ignored him. So, the rival florist hired Hugh MacTaggart, the roughest and most vicious thug in town to"persuade" them to close. Hugh beat up the friars and trashed their store, saying he'd be back if they didn't close up shop. Terrified, they did so, thereby proving that Hugh, and only Hugh, can prevent florist friars.

 

[Whispering Winds]

Keep em' coming! I love them!!!!

 

[4 luv of eggs]

A cowboy was leaning against a fence smoking a cigarette when he looks up and sees Roy Rogers coming up the path madder than he'd ever seen him.
"What's the matter Roy?"
"Look at my feet!" The cowboy then noticed that he was barefoot.
"Where's your boots?"
"I was out on the range when a mountain lion came out of nowhere. I managed to get away but the danged thing got my boots. My brand new mail order boots!"
"Whatcha fixin' to do?"
"I came back for my rifle and I'm going back out and hunt that thing down." Roy headed inside and appeared a few minutes later, rifle in hand, mounted Trigger and rode off.
A few hours later, the cowboy looks up as Roy rides up. Slung across Trigger's back was the mountain lion.
So the cowboy says, "Pardon me Roy, is that the cat that chewed your new shoes?"

 

[lina stewards]

I love puns as well especially these ones
The person who invented the door knock won the No-bell prize.
How did I escape Iraq? Iran.
If Apple made a car, would it have Windows?