~ Retired and Starting My Future In The Foothills ~

[gryeyes]

I have to share a story about John, his language, and a misunderstanding.

When he was installing the electronic pet door and was on the outside of the house, I passed items through the opening to him. At one point, I got a text message on my phone, so I picked it up and was responding to it. This was just as he was passing something back through the opening to me. What I heard him say was "Don't be a witch." (But the w was a b sound.)

I was SO shocked. Huh?? I put my phone down, guiltily, and accepted the drill. The installation continued without incident, but I was very disturbed by the comment. I figured I would have a discussion with him later about why that happened....

Several days later, as I was helping him put the shed together, I was standing with a hammer in one hand, just staring off into the distance at some of my chickens. John said, "Don't be a bench, Linda."

When I looked at him, processing the words, he said, "You know where that saying comes from?"

"No, I don't. Please explain." I was rapidly thinking, oh my goodness, he called me a bench that time!

"It's a carpenter saying. What do benches do? Not much, they just hold things. So, don't just stand there holding something, being a bench."

I replied, "I am SO glad you explained that! Last week I thought you said, "Don't be a witch" to me (again, substituting the b for the w.)

He looked really shocked. "Oh, no! I would never say that! Really, you thought I said that? Why didn't you say something to me!!!"

"I am. Now."

"I would NEVER say something like that. Oh my god. You must have thought I was a real jerk!"

"I really just wondered what I had done to have you say that... "

"Nothing. One, you're a customer. Two, I don't use language like that unless I am very ticked. Three, I would never say that TO a woman, ever."

And we continued on with our tasks. A little later, he nudged me. I was standing there with the measuring tape, watching the chickens again. "Oh, right... I'm being a bench again."

So, y'all can see why his use of that other vulgarism - when describing what my egg sales sign should read - made me almost fall over laughing. He just doesn't use bad language.

 

[HHandbasket]

Oh whew! I was a little taken aback by that because I don't think I've ever heard John use a foul word! LOL! Making jokes in double entendres, yes, but foul language, no! That's just not like him! The neighbor obviously has ticked him off but good!

 

[jtbrown]

Congrats!

 

[9Catsz]

Quote:
The only free eggs I'd give that neighbor are the kind kids use on Halloween....yanno? thrown at their house.

Seriously though, so freakin' glad you won!!!!!

Quote:
OMG this reminded me of the song "Alice's Restaurant"
They was taking plaster tire tracks, foot prints, dog smelling prints, and they took twenty seven eight-by-ten colour glossy photographs with circles and arrows and a paragraph on the back of each one explaining what each one was to be used as evidence against us. Took pictures of the approach, the getaway, the northwest corner the southwest corner and that's not to mention the aerial photography.


EDITED to LAUGH: Hahaha...I posted this before I read through the entire post...and you reference this song....Great minds, eh?

 

[gryeyes]

I have mentioned that I won, right?

I cracked myself up again yesterday morning when I opened the people door of my coop mistaken for a stable. "Giddyap," I told those chickens who hadn't already exited the structure via the open, automatic pop door.

Hhandbasket and Farmer Lew brought BACK a cockerel they had collected by mistake: Michael. His brother Patrick is the one of those two which needs to go to Freezer Camp.

A co-worker met me at the rental property to gather up the contents of the shed and any anything else of mine in the back yard we could stuff into his van and the back of my RAV4. Then he followed me home.

He got out of his van at the top of the driveway, saying, "Wow. This is fantastic, Linda!". I gave him the whole tour, outside and inside. He continued to exclaim, "Wow!" He'd stop and look up at the top of one of the Ponderosa pines, or gaze up into the sky between trees, or study a cedar with awe. He, too, mentioned there is a very good "vibe" to the property.

"Now you see why I don't mind the commute?" I asked. "It's a long distance to drive, but beautiful!"

He wanted to know the complainant's location so I pointed out his property. "Oh, he's gotta be nuts!"

Yah, that's the consensus of a whole lotta people right now.

 

[Noncentzter]

Yeah Linda, I think I've heard that you won and am so happy for you!

 

[Rusty Hills Farm]

Every once in awhile somebody in authority actually does something RIGHT for a change. You rock, Linda!

Rusty

 

[suebee]

Yada, yada, yada.....So where's John? Just Kidding.

 

[coloradochick]

Sorry Linda but this is chuckle worthy

 

[debilorrah]

I am so happy for you Linda. I am too lazy tonight to go back and see if I commented before (over 50 brain at work here). I have followed this from the beginning and prayed about it so much! Even though there have been some obstacles thrown your way, that place was meant to be your home.