saying goodbye

[vintagegem]

I had to dispose of one of my hens just now........I have never in my life had to kill a living creature till today and it was without doubt one of the worst things I have ever had to do.......I hope I did a good quick job, but I find myself going over every little detail and hating myself. She was one of my first ever chickens after waiting 20 years for my first flock, and I only had her just short of one year, I know it sounds really silly but I am just sick right now, I feel so horrible ......

 

[Ol Grey Mare]

I had to dispose of one of my hens just now........I have never in my life had to kill a living creature till today and it was without doubt one of the worst things I have ever had to do.......I hope I did a good quick job, but I find myself going over every little detail and hating myself. She was one of my first ever chickens after waiting 20 years for my first flock, and I only had her just short of one year, I know it sounds really silly but I am just sick right now, I feel so horrible ......

I am so very sorry. Without knowing the details it sounds like it was a situation where you did what needed to be done - that it was in the best interest of your hen, and there is nothing to hate yourself for over that.

 

[vintagegem]

Thank you.....this is my first year of chicken keeping after wanting them for so long, and I have to say I know I'm being a lightweight but this has just broken my heart, I know its part of chicken keeping but I just will never get over how hard it was to send her on her way. I know really I'm too much of a tenderheart to keep livestock really, but I have always loved chickens ......I hope that with time it will get easier for me

 

[vintagegem]

I have just 5 hens left in my flock now, and I'm thinking that's too little......really don't want to do chicks so will be looking for another 4-6 pullets soon, this first year of chicken keeping has been a massive learning experience for me, but I have to say all in all a pleasant one

 

[lalaland]

vintagegem, hang in there. It is really the worst thing, so horrible, the first time, and it haunts you. Very painful emotionally. Now, years later after the first time, it is still hard, I still dread it, but I have found more comfort in knowing I am doing what is best for the bird. And getting more skilled at it helps too - so they go so quickly and suffering ends.

Life is so fragile.

I am glad you are looking forward to adding more to your flock. You mentioned it is your first year.and you would add more in the spring...so you have time to read up on quarantine and time to figure out how you might accomplish that with your particular set up. Its a trade off with chicks - chicks take more time and care, but day old chicks dont' require quarantine.....pullets require less time and care but require space for quarantine....and either way there is integration to work out.

I say require, but not everyone quarantines. It is a gamble you decide to either take or not take!