So, would you be offended, POed or what?

[Bettacreek]

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Lol. No, he and my mother work together. Mom would never help him to go behind my back on something. She probably assumed that I didn't want to go, and then simply asked if I would house sit.

As for "us", someone at work had a talk with him, and he finally decided that he wanted to be a part of the family (or so it seems), and INCLUDE us in things. I'm not perfect, and in a perfect world, I'd have left him before winter was over, because he wasn't great. BUT, oh, hell, I don't know how to explain it. He does try, though he's not perfect. He's got his complaints about me as well, and I try, but I'm not perfect either. Either way, for now, it's actually not a bad situation totally, there're a few things that honk me off, but, for the most part, the relationship has more ups than downs.

 

[DTchickens]

I'd say sit down and talk to him, my girlfriend (actually fiancee) and I have never really wanted a break from each other. The only time we've felt like a break is usually because there was something underneath that hasn't been talked about. Don't yell, judge or anything like that.. Just sit down and talk calmly, see where it takes you. I agree it is a little fishy by how he is making himself come off, but like I said he may just have something underneath the surface that involves something you did, do, or it could really be he just wants a night out to himself but didn't want to come out with the truth because he's afraid of how mad you'd be at him.

It's hard to tell really, which is why I say "talk". Most of the times divorce, and break ups are caused by lack of communication for some reason. Just my 2 cents..

-Daniel.

 

[Boyd]

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hear hear!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

guys feel guilty when they need to get away from their ladies. I actually have planned a "couch" night each week. Its a night I get to rest, drink as much whiskey n coke as I want in the 2nd living room on the couch, with the door closed with no interuptions watching NCIS for hours n hours n hours n hours and sleep in.

 

[Whispering Winds]

It will all come out in the wash. . .men can be so thoughtless sometimes. My DH is about as thick as a post on things, and he is just amazed sometimes that he has done something to hurt my feelings, so I figured that after 44 years together this Nov. 27 (40 married, 4 dating) I would just go and mess with my animals and DS. They love and appreciate me and show me in every way. . .do you know how his dad was with his mom? I think that has a LOT to do with it too.

 

[redhen]

I WOULD bring my kids to their fathers house and go to that party... totally just show up...
Hes being very sneaky in my opinion... seems there is a reason that he dosent want you there...
No way in He77 that would happen here...
But i'm a witch..so dont go by what i would do....

 

[MagsC]

I am with deb, plan a girls night!!!
But I can understand you being upset. Go with your instincts.

 

[Bettacreek]

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LOL! I could totally imagine, lol.
As for the whole thing, I really don't feel like there's anything that I would "catch" him doing. I do feel that he just wants to go and get sloshed, act like a total idiot with the rest of the drunken idiots. I just don't understand why someone would be so adamant about it and lie about it.

 

[Bettacreek]

He finally said that he lied about it because he "didn't want to crush my feelings". I suppose it's a lose-lose situation no matter what he had told me, because I probably would have been angry if he said straight up, "I don't want you there". He could have done it much differently though, like, "it's a guy's night" or something.

Someone, at the very least, needs to learn some tact.

 

[Boyd]

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guys have no tact, and sometimes we feel guilty because we want to be alone, eat bugs and do the bad thing....................

(ok a reference from the shining won't help much, but its soooooooooooooo true............)

 

[claud]

Well, my guess is he just wanted to get away with the guys and drink too much, eat too much, act stupid and fart and stuff - things us ladies would just rather not witness.

Probably didn't want to tell you because he knew you'd think it meant he didn't love you(enough).

Just guessing - but who can understand them?