Something bad happened at work today

[BeardedChick]

If she died that quickly, I wouldn't count on CPR having saved her, and I think in many cases it's better for a person's last moments to be peaceful. CPR is chaotic and anything but peaceful.

Please think about sending her family a note. I would think that for YOU being able to tell her family what you have shared with us might do you a lot of good.

DH and I found someone on the side of the road one time who was in the process of passing - he was crumpled under a pile of lumber after having a heart attack - we did CPR but he was gone by the time the ambulance arrived. Anyway, I sent his family flowers and a note, and they later called me with some questions. It gave them a sense of closure to know what happened at the end. And it helped me a lot because there IS a sense of grief there for those that we can't save.

 

[jbowyer01]

Dont let the what if's get to you. Looking back there are a million things we could change in our daily lives but things happen for a reason. Please just give yourself credit for trying to help when you did. ((HUG))

 

[kbarrett]

NOT your fault. This was not a scenario where you walked by someone in obvious distress asking for help and kept walking, or that you are a trained medical professional who recognized something was "off" and didn't check. Trust me, "what if's" will drive you nuts if you let them. It's common after a traumatic experience to replay those moments over & over looking for changes you could have made or imagining a different outcome. It helps me to make a conscious decision to change the subject I'm thinking about or get busy doing something that requires concentration.

 

[HennysMom]

horsejody -

I know you're traumatized by it, but - honestly hun, she probably didnt even know you were there walking by, especially if she was having a seizure or something. I know that doesnt sound very good but...God has a plan for us all and what happens is supposed to happen - in the order it happens.

Perhaps as Bearded Chick said, it is your job to bring much comfort to this dear lady's family now - (leaving out any unneeded descriptions of course) to let them know she was not "alone" - you were there and saw what you believed was her stretching / sleeping and/or resting on the couch, just as you had stated you'd commonly seen so many others doing at different times. It wasnt anything out of the ordinary, right?

Your Co-workers and you were there during her last moments dear - and kept her alive long enough for the Rescue Squad to take over. Heroic... and comforting to that lady. She knew at that point in time you all were there for her and she was not alone - even if you were not the one doing CPR - you were there, which provides comfort and ease to that woman.

May that moment you witnessed bring this dear woman's family much closure - I know it would for me if it were my family member and you told me that.

to you

 

[kbarrett]

Quote:
BeardedChick, that is an amazingly kind service you and your DH did for that family.

to you and your DH for being so kind!

 

[skirbo]

I'm sorry that happened. But you have to know there really wasn't any way for you to know something was wrong, and nothing that you could have done would have changed the outcome in that narrow window of opportunity.

Hugs,
Sarah

 

[horsejody]

Just as I found her, her grandson (about 25 years old) was walking in the front door. I think he went to pull the car around front for her and left her waiting on the couch. She was fine when he left her. The womans daughter got there just as the paramedics were leaving with her. I have already told them what I saw. The poor grandson was just beside himself while CPR was being done. I know he feels terrible because he left her for a few minutes and had no idea what was about to happen. He seems like such a nice kid.

 

[BeardedChick]

The womans daughter got there just as the paramedics were leaving with her. I have already told them what I saw.

My situation was like that, too. The family got there at the end. But days later, they were glad to get a note and have a chance to talk about it again. Maybe it won't be like that in your case, but I think it might be good to tell her family exactly this:

I am just sad that her last moments on earth might have been spent all alone reaching out and seeing me just walk by like she was invisible.

It may mean something to them that you are thinking about them and about her (and honestly, you are and this event will never be gone from your memory).​

 

[SpottedCrow]

I'm sorry, Jody...
Obviously it was her time to go.
You did what you were supposed to do. Most folks would rather be alone to cross.
She might've been reaching out to her spirit guide or whomever came through to help her cross.
Hugs.

 

[EweSheep]

So sorry .... just dont beat up yourself about that.....God has the time and place for all of us to go. Even in places we didn't expect either!

Well said Bearded Chick, well said!