Quote:
Ipecac flavored hotdogs.
JetBlack, you kill me! I just snorted.
Mission accomplished
Ipecac flavored hotdogs.
JetBlack, you kill me! I just snorted.
Mission accomplished
SOOO Aggravating!
- Thread starter debilorrah
- Start date
Quote:
Ipecac flavored hotdogs.
I personally was leaning towards chocolate exlax brownies, but ipecac works too!
The brownies work, but simply take some chocolate chips with plenty of the chocolate exlax, melt it, pour it into cupcake papers, add peanut butter and they will eat every last one of those peanut butter cups! Then, a gurgly tummies will be too preoccupied in the bathroom!!
Ipecac flavored hotdogs.
I personally was leaning towards chocolate exlax brownies, but ipecac works too!
The brownies work, but simply take some chocolate chips with plenty of the chocolate exlax, melt it, pour it into cupcake papers, add peanut butter and they will eat every last one of those peanut butter cups! Then, a gurgly tummies will be too preoccupied in the bathroom!!
I don't have any kids. I have a few friends (very few) who have kids. I have told them repeatedly, with good clear diction but in a loving tone of voice, that I do not like children. Honestly. I have no patience for them. I refuse to treat them in any other manner than they are short adults. Which means I don't sugar-coat what I say. (Okay, I don't use swear words or vulgarisms, but I don't pull punches.)
One co-worker likes to come over unannounced to feed my land-lady's 3 sheep and see my chickens, with her 9 year old daughter. She always says, "We won't stay long, just brought treats for the sheep and chickens." Like that's supposed to make it okay?
The sheep and chickens all free-range, so it's not like she comes into our individual back yards, but she DOES have to open a chain link drive gate to get into the driveway to my house, which runs next to my land-lady's back yard .......
What freakin' gall, right?? Thanks for the sheep treats, but don't kid us it's not a special outing for your spoiled daughter to pet sheep and TRY to pet chickens. The salad leavings and dry bread you're getting rid of is just your assumed "gate pass" to this local
pet farm animal attraction on a sunny, weekend day.
My real friends really do understand me and if they hold it against me that I don't like THEIR kids any more than anybody else's kids (I may know more about them but that doesn't mean I have an emotional bond with 'em), they lie about it. I've been present when they say very seriously, "Linda doesn't like children so keep them away from her... " I've seen the side glances and I make an effort to meet those folks' gaze, to say, "This is true," with a pleasant smile.
The best part is that if the kids are nearby and hear it, THEY GET IT. Even if their parents do not.
One co-worker likes to come over unannounced to feed my land-lady's 3 sheep and see my chickens, with her 9 year old daughter. She always says, "We won't stay long, just brought treats for the sheep and chickens." Like that's supposed to make it okay?
The sheep and chickens all free-range, so it's not like she comes into our individual back yards, but she DOES have to open a chain link drive gate to get into the driveway to my house, which runs next to my land-lady's back yard .......
What freakin' gall, right?? Thanks for the sheep treats, but don't kid us it's not a special outing for your spoiled daughter to pet sheep and TRY to pet chickens. The salad leavings and dry bread you're getting rid of is just your assumed "gate pass" to this local
pet farm animal attraction on a sunny, weekend day.
My real friends really do understand me and if they hold it against me that I don't like THEIR kids any more than anybody else's kids (I may know more about them but that doesn't mean I have an emotional bond with 'em), they lie about it. I've been present when they say very seriously, "Linda doesn't like children so keep them away from her... " I've seen the side glances and I make an effort to meet those folks' gaze, to say, "This is true," with a pleasant smile.
The best part is that if the kids are nearby and hear it, THEY GET IT. Even if their parents do not.
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Quote:
I personally was leaning towards chocolate exlax brownies, but ipecac works too!
The brownies work, but simply take some chocolate chips with plenty of the chocolate exlax, melt it, pour it into cupcake papers, add peanut butter and they will eat every last one of those peanut butter cups! Then, a gurgly tummies will be too preoccupied in the bathroom!!
With adults I would lace all their hot dogs with Extra Strength Metamucil. Once their guts start gurgling and churning, I'd tell them I have good news and bad news (x2).
"Bad news. It's poison. Can you feel it dissolving your insides?" [gurgle]
"The good news? Here's the antidote! But again, with the bad news... there's only enough for one of you. If you try to share it, you will all die. I'll just leave it here, on the table and you all can decide who deserves it." They immediately begin eying each other malevolently. Each thinking "Mine."
When you are out of earshot and your cohorts begine berating you with "I can't believe you poisoned those people! How could you?!?!"
"It's not poison. It's Metamucil. It's gonna make them fight each other, poop a bunch and then never come over here again."
"But if that was Metamucil, what was in the antidote?"
[pause for effect]
"Metamucil."
I personally was leaning towards chocolate exlax brownies, but ipecac works too!
The brownies work, but simply take some chocolate chips with plenty of the chocolate exlax, melt it, pour it into cupcake papers, add peanut butter and they will eat every last one of those peanut butter cups! Then, a gurgly tummies will be too preoccupied in the bathroom!!
With adults I would lace all their hot dogs with Extra Strength Metamucil. Once their guts start gurgling and churning, I'd tell them I have good news and bad news (x2).
"Bad news. It's poison. Can you feel it dissolving your insides?" [gurgle]
"The good news? Here's the antidote! But again, with the bad news... there's only enough for one of you. If you try to share it, you will all die. I'll just leave it here, on the table and you all can decide who deserves it." They immediately begin eying each other malevolently. Each thinking "Mine."
When you are out of earshot and your cohorts begine berating you with "I can't believe you poisoned those people! How could you?!?!"
"It's not poison. It's Metamucil. It's gonna make them fight each other, poop a bunch and then never come over here again."
"But if that was Metamucil, what was in the antidote?"
[pause for effect]
"Metamucil."
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How DID you keep your cool??? I've had similar situations like that happen here!!
Kids sometimes, huh? I hope that you got it across to them all, and explain that it better not ever happen again!! Good luck Debi!!
Quote:
X100 !! I raised my kids, grew em up and at such time they wanted to be buttheads, I threw them OUT of the house! They are now older (27 years old) and more respectful. I DO NOT tolerate anyone else's kids because I have YET to find one that knows how to act in public.
X100 !! I raised my kids, grew em up and at such time they wanted to be buttheads, I threw them OUT of the house! They are now older (27 years old) and more respectful. I DO NOT tolerate anyone else's kids because I have YET to find one that knows how to act in public.
Quote:
For me it's easy, I let the dog out. He's insane and not socialized, doesn't bite, but will dang sure knock your butt over with his jumping/rearing/licking/grabbing... I made him this way
For me it's easy, I let the dog out. He's insane and not socialized, doesn't bite, but will dang sure knock your butt over with his jumping/rearing/licking/grabbing... I made him this way
- Thread starter
- #48
Quote:
X100 !! I raised my kids, grew em up and at such time they wanted to be buttheads, I threw them OUT of the house! They are now older (27 years old) and more respectful. I DO NOT tolerate anyone else's kids because I have YET to find one that knows how to act in public.
These kids CAN be good. They were here all day and I told them the coop was off limits and they stayed out. Ken and I agree that NO ONE is let anyone in the coop unless one us is here to supervise. In fact once today, everyone but me went outside and the kids were all in here making SOOO much noise. Ken came in and saw and went out and told him to get his arse inside and watch his kids.
X100 !! I raised my kids, grew em up and at such time they wanted to be buttheads, I threw them OUT of the house! They are now older (27 years old) and more respectful. I DO NOT tolerate anyone else's kids because I have YET to find one that knows how to act in public.
These kids CAN be good. They were here all day and I told them the coop was off limits and they stayed out. Ken and I agree that NO ONE is let anyone in the coop unless one us is here to supervise. In fact once today, everyone but me went outside and the kids were all in here making SOOO much noise. Ken came in and saw and went out and told him to get his arse inside and watch his kids.
I love Ken!
- Thread starter
- #50
Quote:
Me too!
Neither of us really wanted the unexpected drop in today and the fact that they stayed 8 hours had us both passing each other and whispering UGH to each other. I had no problem eating a steak in front of them either. Sara was going to give the dad HER steak. I said HELL NO!!!! Put it in the fridge, I'll make a salad tomorrow, we already cooked 2 hot dogs for him.
Me too!
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