It sure felt like a failure yesterday but I feel better now after 15 hours of undisturbed rest. That panic attack sure worked a number in me, though. I always feel like crying for a couple days afterwards. I'm able to talk about it now without bursting into tears, but it was touch and go for awhile.
Luckily, my aunt and uncle drove from San Antonio to pick me up. They are great and didn't force me to tell them what was wrong. It helps that Mom was in the phone with them to tell them that I just needed time to sort it all out. I'm one of those people who can have a crisis, panic, cry, sleep and then come up with several viable solutions before settling on the right one. Not going back just happens to be the right solution this time. I feel relief and absolutely no disappointment now that I know I won't be going back.
Those kind of raw exposed uncontrollable feelings happen to everybody sometimes. Especially people with artistic sensibilities like yourself. But you seem to have resilience and recovery strategies and fabulous family support. You'll make the best of this.
OOHH! I have wanted to get some scottish highlanders! We had a friend who had a bull he wanted to breed with his black angus (I think). I've researched them and love them. Another breed I love is the, Oh! just had a brain freeze and can't think of the name , they look like oreo cookies, black with white band around middle. It might come to me in the middle of the night!! Hope everything goes well tomorrow.
Another thing he told me: one of the big reasons for bringing me along was because he thought I could get some sort of religious epiphany. He said, "I wouldn't just bring anyone into my home and I can get good graphic designers with a phone call. We brought you here because we thought we could help you get closer to God!"
OK, that truly was a weird arrangement. Did he expect you to live with them so you would be available 24x7 (and get 'proper' religion *) or was it so you could afford to move to Austin?
(*) If it were me that whole "we'll set you right religiously" thing would have had me running the other way REAL FAST too. I really don't care what religion a person is but don't try to shove it my way. I know what the religions are, I know where to find their places of worship. If I were interested in 'yours' I would already be there. Interesting poll a couple of years ago related to what people following particular religions know about other religions. Atheists knew more about the various religions than any group other than those who followed each. In fact (and I'm NOT kidding) MORE atheists knew Mother Theresa was a Catholic than the Catholics! Mormans came in second in knowing about religions other than their own.
@tomtommom... Don't let your hubby toss those buckets with the holes in the side just yet! They will work! I was thinking about the problem of the nipples on the bottom and these folks figured that problem out... http://www.avianaquamiser.com/3homemadechickenwaterer/
You guys that use nipples, does this price seem really high? ^^^^^ They have several articles about heated water for cold weather. I will definitely be reading those!
You can get 5 nipples for $6 on Amazon and it looks like these people aren't even giving you the bucket?!? The price is likely for all the "extra" information. You can find a hundred examples of how to build a bucket waterer here on BYC. And if you know anyone that does drywall taping, or know someone at a grocery store, you can probably get a bucket for nothing.
You might want to bring in a second opinion. Sometimes I'll be scratching my head trying to figure out how to do something and my boyfriend comes along and just tells me the answer and I think to myself, "WHY didn't I think of that, duh!" Now of course that goes both ways but he might not be as quick to admit it. LOL
That's what I was thinking on the nipple waterers, thanks!
I know I'm weird (as a guy I mean) but I agree, two (or more) heads are ALWAYS better than one. One example of just what you are saying:
We have a trash compactor and we don't put bones or fat in it, nor do we put them down the garbage disposal to clog the pipes. In the winter we put it in bags and just left them in a bucket in the garage until it was time to go to the dump (every 4 weeks or so, when the recycle bins got full). But in the summer, that made for some "ripe" bags of stuff. MANY years ago, my mother came to visit. She said "why not put them in the freezer?" Palm -> face. How STUPID can we get, talk about OBVIOUS! Yet it had not occurred to two people with college degrees, both of whom are quite practical.
I have a 6 year old step-son, so I know what I have waiting for me. I am pretty patient, but I have told him to shut up every once in a while.... he has a habit of narrating EVERYTHING he does. "I am reading. I'm a good kid for reading, aren't I? I am so big. I like reading. Hey, I am reading. etc." He's just terrified to go unnoticed.
My own son actually doesn't speak at all. He's mildly deaf and likely autistic... He's just now learning how to communicate without words, which is a big deal.
Sounds like your step-son needs to feel important. Not surprising given the situation, those new little ones need and get a lot of attention and your son having special needs adds to that. I'm sure your step-son will lighten up on the need for attention/validation if you keep letting him know that EVERYONE in the family is equally important.
I'm so totally going to allow you as much standing and staring time as you need. When you get tired I've put some brownies with pecans over on the table-the never ending treat table!
I am a stander and stare 'r too. but while I am standing and staring I draw as well. I cant walk into the shop without a note pad.
Here is a sketch I made up without knowing your rise and turn.... It is to scale in that one square equals two inches.
Beef up the baulster at the landings because changes in the the rise and run always cause missteps and stumbles. As little as 1/4 inch difference between treads can cause trouble. From an ergonomic point of view. I designed steel stairs and work platforms for access for aircraft assembly ares.
I show a baulster at the top next to the Newel post.... That may help you in the transistion.
here is the landing
I do not envy you the whole process of calculating compound angles.... The odd step may make you joint for the corners "interesting".... I drew the landing straight not turning but The join position would be in the same spot.... 90 degree turn causes the compound joint.
You are a peach Deb. I'll have to take some pictures so you can see just what a problem that 180 will be. Not only do I have to make that turn, I have to build a 4" extension to the mid landings step ( with a 'wall' all the way to the floor) because if I put the newel on the landing, the width of the landings and step will be even more "non code" (shhh, don't tell anyone) than it will be i.e. not 36" wide. Actually it is MORE than 36" wide on the floor but as far as someone walking, well the 8"x10" beam you see on the wall in the first picture steals too much of the "code requirement" distance. So I guess that TECHNICALLY they are wide enough, since the distance is measured on the floor.
I need a baluster on the top landing anyway, to meet the 4" sphere rule. I had to move the newel back so the newel bolt would go into the beam below. This actually turns out to be a benefit since the PROPER way to do this with an over easing is to connect the easing to the rail that will go up the stairs, then move the newel post back on the landing until the over easing meets the fitting on the newel at level. Can't do that in this case because 1) I already have the railing installed upstairs 2) it would make the hall even narrower 3) the newel bolt would miss the beam on the far side! Since the subfloor of the second floor is the ceiling of the first floor and the newel bolt is 5" long, we would have 1) a really weak support 2) 2 1/2" of lag bolt sticking through the ceiling downstairs
So I might have to make a 'non gooseneck' with a bit of up easing bolted to the over easing so it meets the level quarter turn at the right height. I'll be cutting back that free end on the quarter turn as close to the 90 as I can. Or maybe I'll get lucky and it will meet closely enough I can sand the quarter turn some so there isn't a hard angle where it meets the over easing. This is definitely a "measure 50 times, cut once" operation.
Bruce, I normally let him do his thing but I have two cows being delivered tomorrow morning early and they have to have a place to go. This project has now been in the works for 2 weeks. We purchased the cows a month ago. I have been out every day helping pound stakes and string wire. He is out there now at 8 pm hooking up the electric wire. He still needs to use the tractor to level the mud and ruts caused when they delivered the run in shed for the Heifers last week.The stock trailer will get stuck trying to get into the pasture if we don't fill it in. Since I cannot drive either tractor yet It is a job he has to do. It is getting dark. In his defense, he has a form of ADD that runs in his family. His dad and his brother were the same way. I am just panicking tonight because there is no more time to tweak this project. I hope we can keep them in the run-in shed and the small paddock until they get used to being here. It will give us a little more time to correct any weaknesses in the perimeter electric fence.
We have been told they have a tendency to bolt when moved to an unfamiliar place.
Wish me luck everybody I have never had cattle before. These girls are supposed to be docile, like to be brushed and are not as large as some breeds. They both come from championship lines. I am going to try to learn how to show them. I would like to enter the older heifer in the National Western Stock Show in Denver next year. Her mother placed first there a few years ago. They are still a lot bigger than me and can be difficult until they get to know you. They are Scottish Highlanders. They are fairly small in stature, very shaggy and hardy, with long sweeping horns on the girls and more upright horns on the boys . It is a breed my husband has wanted for some time.
It does sound like a "can't cut corners" situation! I take it these cows aren't lead trained so they can be unloaded without going to the pasture. too bad, it would cut out that "just more more" task. At least it gets light relatively early now so MAYBE he can do the grading in the morning before the cows come. Definitely wishing you good luck, I'm sure it will all end well! Big animals are a lot harder to handle than day old chicks!
Oh no, it doesn't and I don't. I just meant that the perception is that all Christians are good people who you can trust. Obviously that is a blanket statement, and I know it's not true. This experience just solidified it. You can't trust any person who comes out and sells you the Christian card.
However, I know plenty of wonderful Christian people who are normal and not at all manipulative. So no, I'm not going to be jaded by this bad experience. I have faith that there are still decent people in this world. These people might be good people, too. They just don't mesh with my ideal "good person".
Ibejaran... the best way to see what Christianity is "supposed" to be like is to look at the source. People will fail you, all people sooner or later. Sad but true. But there is one that will never fail you.
My step-son is the way he is. He's been like that from day 1.
His mom's side is a large family and they all used to spoil him rotten, uncles would teach him inappropriate things, encourage "look at me" behavior... his ADD doesn't help. But, I can honestly say he has improved tremendously over the years.. I have a better understanding of what makes him tick, than both of his parents. Just a knack I suppose.. I've told both how to address his needy behavior, what they do with it is up to them
I let him be important, give him special tasks, ask for favors and make sure he knows how much help he is. With his little brother I make sure he knows he needs a little extra help and that his help is so important. He's really a great big brother. He actually came home from his mom's tonight with a new blanket for his sister. She said he used his birthday money to pay for it. It does my heart good that he loves his sibblings so much. He'd been asking for a sister time and time again.. he got two brothers (one with me, one with his mom) and then finally a sister. His mom is unable to have more kids and we don't want any more, so he got lucky
@Bruce... I wonder if there is something different in the design of those nipples. I was reading and most nipples say 1 nipple to every 3 chickens. This one says 1 nipple to 17 chickens. I wonder if there is something different about them making them more expensive.
My step-son is the way he is. He's been like that from day 1.
His mom's side is a large family and they all used to spoil him rotten, uncles would teach him inappropriate things, encourage "look at me" behavior... his ADD doesn't help. But, I can honestly say he has improved tremendously over the years.. I have a better understanding of what makes him tick, than both of his parents. Just a knack I suppose.. I've told both how to address his needy behavior, what they do with it is up to them
I let him be important, give him special tasks, ask for favors and make sure he knows how much help he is. With his little brother I make sure he knows he needs a little extra help and that his help is so important. He's really a great big brother. He actually came home from his mom's tonight with a new blanket for his sister. She said he used his birthday money to pay for it. It does my heart good that he loves his sibblings so much. He'd been asking for a sister time and time again.. he got two brothers (one with me, one with his mom) and then finally a sister. His mom is unable to have more kids and we don't want any more, so he got lucky
, they look like oreo cookies, black with white band around middle. It might come to me in the middle of the night!!
Hope everything goes well tomorrow.
