THe i want to slap my stepdaughter upside her head rant by Conny

[conny63malies]

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legally married for darn near eight years. The whole problem really started when he took a recruiting station in Fl to be near them.

 

[morelcabin]

There is nothing wrong with a husband and wife publicly declaring thier love for one another, after all, that is exactly how the marriage starts, with public declaration. It is when one or the other allows someone outside the mariage to trample that love, and does not defend that love, that problems arise.

ksacres- you obviously have a very healthy relationship, from what I am reading here...keep it up, love your 'together' attitude!

 

[PineBurrowPeeps]

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This will probably make you upset and I'm sorry, but you both need to grow up. Even if she's 18 she's the kid here and your attitude isn't helping. I don't know all the history of you two, but I know there's always 3 sides to every story....hers, hers, and the truth. Coming on a public forum and cursing your step-daughter isn't real grown-up. My son-in-law & daughter didn't get along with his step mom either, but they took the high road and never stooped to her level and now they have an ok relationship. She'll always be his daughter and you might not always be his wife and she knows that.

I'm sorry too, but I've got to agree with Katy.

First of all - I dont know ANY wife and husband that "Myspace" to each other

- you're married - why would you MySpace messages to one another? Seems to me you KNOW this is an issue, has been since you married him so you're inviting this behavior in a way by going out and posting on your husbands Myspace page, clearly set up by him because his children and ex-wife live far away from your post.

My husband and I Myspace eachother... We leave little lovey notes and cute pictures for eachother all the time. Even though I see him tons and he's in my bed every night. I don't see anything wrong with that. We've been very happily married 10 years almost, first and only marriage for either of us. We also e-mail eachother flirty little notes and stuff. Helps keep a spark going ;-)

 

[TexasVet]

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WHAT? The WIFE is an interloper?? I think not. Kids shouldn't get to call the shots. Ever. Saying that disrespect and racism is "just what kids do" is wrong. That kind of behaviour would never have been tolerated when I was growing up.

Coni can't help the fact that she's German (nor should she ever have to defend it). She's not a Nazi anymore than I'm part of the KKK. You can't be held responsible for things that happened beyond your control. Letting those kids say things like that putting down her race is a big-time no no. I can't believe any parent would let their kids say things like that to anyone, let alone their spouse.

Deep breath girl, slowly release. Deep breath, hold it, release.

Until you have 20 years of marriage and stepkids under your belt, I don't think you can fully understand the dynamics of this situation. Personal relationships are complicated, and kids (especially 18 year olds) seldom respond well to "do what I say or else" demands. And yes, what kids want/feel should be considered as well.

 

[morelcabin]

Quote:
legally married for darn near eight years. The whole problem really started when he took a recruiting station in Fl to be near them.

Well then, you, as his wife just keep standing behind him the way any good wife should, and he, as your husband has to learn to stand behind you. Once you have built your relationship to that point, interference won't be an issue...been there:>)

 

[conny63malies]

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one room wont work because they moved away after we moved to Florida. THey are in TN we are in Ohio. Plus i am not invited to the wedding. THere will be no gradutation their mom let the oldest already drop out.

 

[morelcabin]

I think your husband really needs to take a stand regarding the wedding...

 

[debilorrah]

Quote:

Deep breath girl, slowly release. Deep breath, hold it, release.

Until you have 20 years of marriage and stepkids under your belt, I don't think you can fully understand the dynamics of this situation. Personal relationships are complicated, and kids (especially 18 year olds) seldom respond well to "do what I say or else" demands. And yes, what kids want/feel should be considered as well.

KS is my friend - she knows what I am saying. She knows I love her.

 

[PineBurrowPeeps]

Connie, Keep your chin up. She is at a difficult age and step siblings/parents are dicey territory.

I also wanted to say that my husband and I play the "I Love You More" game too. I highly doubt she was saying she loved him more as a dig to her step DD.

 

[jonesgirl]

I don't think myspace is the issue... No matter what you say when and where the girls will find a way to turn it around and feel threatened...

It sounds like you need more Hubby Support... You should take him on a date and really let him know how it makes you feel...