The meaning of life for a chicken owner

JennsPeeps

Rhymes with 'henn'
11 Years
Jun 14, 2008
6,583
25
261
South Puget Sound
A chronicle of a Sunday in the life of a suburban chicken farmer:

7a - Get out of bed and let the 4 chickens out of the coop before even going to the bathroom. Check for first egg: none. Sigh deeply.

8a-10a - Read newspaper. Ahh... quiet time.

10a - Check out cell phone upgrade options at Verizon store. Realize that the sales clerk and I, though seeming to both be native speakers of English, cannot communicate.

11a - Go home and order new cell phone from Verizon's website.

11:30a - Mow the lawn. Instead of leaving the cut grass on the lawn, rake it up and throw it into the chicken run for them to scratch in for environment enrichment.

12p - Trim the neighbor's out-of-control grape vine. Hide grapes in the pile of grass in the coop for environment enrichment. Save extra grapes for chickens later in the week.

1p - Clean the coop. Change water, add feed. Check for eggs again in vain.

2p - Trim the lilac tree so that it doesn't hit the power wires and burn down the house of People Who Bring Food.

3p - Take a snack to the back yard to sit outside and enjoy the weather.

3:03p - Go get another piece of bread after first piece is stolen. Consider eating inside.

3:15p - Throw away the rotting pumpkin that chickens won't touch but that people swore the chooks would love.

3:30p - Trim the apple tree. Put branches in chicken run for environment enrichment. Throw away apples that chickens or humans won't eat.

4p - Pick the ripe cherry tomatoes. Fend off interested chickens.

4:15p - Scrub out rubber garbage can in order to have clean place to store 2 different brands of 50-pound bags of chicken feed. Curse chicken that wouldn't eat the new brand.

5p - Prepare dinner.

5:15-6p - Practice my voilin.

6p - Eat dinner. Take some leftovers out to the 4 resident velociraptors. Withdraw arm quickly.

7p - Lock chooks in the coop.

7:30p - Mop floor upon discovery that chickens have visited the house at some point during the day.

7:40p - Re-mop floor after DBF walks on it.

8-10p - Fold laundry while watching "Heros".

10p - To bed
 

JennsPeeps

Rhymes with 'henn'
11 Years
Jun 14, 2008
6,583
25
261
South Puget Sound
I realized later that I'd forgotten to put in there that I had trimmed the shrubs alongside the path headed to the coop so that I won't get wet from the morning dew in the coming months.

Lucky birds. Wish I had a me to take care of me.
 

fowltemptress

Frugal Fan Club President
12 Years
Jan 20, 2008
1,796
42
209
Love it, and laughed out loud at the pumpkin and mopping bit.
I want to catalog my day now
 

Buff Hooligans

Scrambled
12 Years
Jun 11, 2007
12,148
348
311
JennsPeeps, brilliantly and cleverly written. Thank you for giving me something to print out and show friends and hubby!
 

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