Sylviaanne I completely understand your frustration. With me it is my DS. No matter what he is told, no matter that he always had to face consequences for his actions he still has to find out the hard life lessons the hard way. It is so difficult to stand by and let them fall or they won't learn that hey, fire burns. I am keeping mythat his new found appreciation for how tough life can be will stick. I don't have high hopes but I'm his mom so I am eternally hopeful he will "get a clue" one day. I figure he is going to be 21 this year. Boys usually start using their brain in a consistently useful manner around 25. I have at least four more years but probably more with him. He is a VERY young soul. I completely get it when other adults choose not to have children. They are your greatest joy but they are also your greatest sorrows at times.
For the ones that don't listen to the words you have to use actions. While at Pizza Hut one day we were paying the bill at the register and my youngest left our side and went through the door to the foyer where the bubblegum and penny toy machines were. She had been told not to wander. She was about 8. My husband was paying and I spotted her. I rushed through the foyer door snatched her up and was out the door into the parking lot where I sat her back down on the ground and looked her in the eye and told her that if I had been a predator I could have had her in a car and out of that parking lot before her dad or me could have stopped it.
That held for several years. I had to demonstrate it once more when she was 12 and went off on her bike to the park without telling us. I had to show her that it was not hard to snatch a kid off a moving bike. And I am strong 5'4" woman but not near the strength that a 6 foot male would possess. Some people just have to be shown that they are not invincible.
