I am wishing all of you the strength and fortitude in this personal mission.
I was a smoker for 25 years. I began when I was 16-years-old. It was such a long time as a smoker that I really could not even remember not being one. I tried every year and I failed.
Finally three years ago (this coming March) I was offered Welbutrin by my doctor. It was given out for free through his clinic. I tried it and it worked.
Here are some of my observations in regards to this method: The instructions say to take the Welbutrin for 8 days prior to quitting. Then on the 8th day or thereafter quit cold turkey. Remain on the medication for an addition 20 weeks if necessary.
Well, since I am visual thinker (I see pictures in my head), I found out that it completely shut off my capacity to remember anything. Even the simplest things were hard to grasp. The medication actually caused the withdrawals immediately so during the 8 days that I was still smoking no amount of puffing could bring about the endorphine rush that nicotine gives to the brain. In other words I was not getting any benefit by smoking (believe me I even smoked twice as much during that 8 days but it did not relieve the withdrawals symptoms)
When I did quit it was no different to me then the previous 8 days already, however, by the 12 days I finally figured out why I was such a mess. I could not visualize anything. Not a single thought could be processed properly in my head. The worst part for me was that I was still in my last semester of a college degree and I was facing my midterms at the time. What a nightmare. I actually bombed several tests. So on that 12th day I quit the Welbutrin and I came back to reality.
The Welbutrin is an anti-psychotic medication, and so may not work for everyone, but I say call your doctors before quitting. Ask them to go over your options and also find out if they are available to you to call (on the phone, yes, in the middle of the night even) in the event that you need some guidance. They might be able to offer an emergency "call-friend" who can talk you through the hardest moments, they might even be your "call-friend". (It might even be a good idea to exchange phone numbers with friends here at BYC for those "dire" moments)
I had tried the patches in the past but found that even if I took the patch off before 5 p.m. every evening that I still could not sleep and when I did sleep I had the most vivid, nightmarish dreams that put me in a bad place from day to day. I usually ended up smoking and using the patch which made things even worse. Trading nicotine for nicotine just did not work for me.
I have heard also that nicotine gum is just as addictive as smoking and that there are folks out there that cannot quit the gum now any more than they were able to quit smoking. Nicotine is a horrible addictive substance that really should be outlawed completely! I am serious. It is just as bad as a narcotic and do not let anyone convince you otherwise.
But, with all that said, I read a medical periodical that explained that after a certain age (typically between 50 and 60), the brain naturally stops firing endorphines via the use of nicotine. So it is not uncommon to run into folks who smoked their entire lives who profess that "I just put them down one day and never looked back". They act as if it is no big deal. This to me is the difference in a "true" addiction and a habit, and that the addiction can become a habit for argument's sake. I was not as fortunate, I had an addiction and was completely consumed by cigarettes. I am so lucky to have been able to find something that worked for me before it was too late.
My goal now is to reach 66-years-old, that is when I will celebrate 25 years as a non-smoker (which in my mind makes up for the 25 years spent as the victim of nicotine). I look forward to that day and I know in my heart that I will never go back to smoking.
On a side note: After taking the Welbutrin, I did not experience a nicotine fit for about a year; and equally so I was not able to even smell cigarettes when I was around other smokers. It was as if the Welbutrin cut off the parts of my brain that "spoke" to me as an addict so aptly describes. Now when I get a fit I recognize that I am actually having an anxiety attack and I am much better at responding to it and relaxing through it (it usually only lasts less than a minute), and when I smell cigarettes it is the most god awful smell ever and it burns my nose, eyes, and throat. I have to ask smokers to either take it elsewhere or I remove myself. If anyone smokes in a car with me in it I cannot breath (which is such a blessing)
Ok, I guess I said my part. I do hope each of you has found the resources to help you through this. Please inform your doctors of your intentions. You might even log onto Philip-Morris.com; I believe they are forced by law to offer support in quiting.
Biggest and Best Wishes....You are all so very strong and brave in this personal battle. Be safe and protect yourself from harm. If you find yourself gaining weight, embrace the weight because it won't take but a few years to overcome that as well. Besides a little weight feels so wonderful to the huggies in your life. Just hug more and you will see that living is a wonderful thing, especially as a non-smoker!
Ron
