This was wrong of me, wasn't it?

[easttxchick]

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[cassidy22]

5-6 weeks is too early to tell anyone. IT's generally not safe to discuss until around 12 weeks when you are in the clear, have had several screenings to show that everything is OK. 5-6 weeks, she hasn't even seen a doc yet, and has just figured out that she skipped her cycle.

She should at least wait until the 8 week screen to show it isn't ectopic, but best to wait that 12 weeks in case of a miscarriage. NO need to get the kids all ramped up about something they don't truly understand, and then have to explain later why it never happened.

I am 8 weeks pregnant right now, and not making a big deal of it to my 2 year old, or anyone else for that matter until I get my initial screenings done and know everything is OK, baby is OK and we are all in the clear.

It sounds like she just wants something to put the attention on her. Most mature women know better than to brag about being pregnant at 5 weeks.

That being said, it might be a good idea for you to find someone to talk to. I don't know your story, but it sounds like you have a lot to be angry about, and it doesn't sound like she is helpful. YOu have a lot to be hurt about too, that she terminated your shared child, but is eager to tell the world about a child with a man she hardly knows. It might be helpful for you to have a trained professional to work this through with. I can't imagine the pain you are going through AND taking care of your children and being their dad.

 

[SmokinChick]

Move and change your number. Good luck to you. Terrible position she has put you in.

 

[chickened]

Hopefully your ex and the donor do what is right for the baby. I would be very cautious as to what you allow your kids to see/hear about the whole thing. It sounds like you have used good judgement so far.

 

[rancher hicks]

You have my sympathy for sure. You also may need counseling to help you deal with what has happened as may your kids as they grow up. How do I know cuz I've been there. My father left us and imagine finding out that your step sister went to college and when you wrote to him for help for college you were turned down?

I suggest NOT letting her tell the kids for the reason they will wonder "why does mommy wants that baby but not me?" I would also keep as big a distance from her as you can, and I would keep the kids away from her as much as you can. You don't mention divorce but surely you've filed for one?

Of course I'm assuming you were not a part of the problem that precipitated this situation, based on the part of her living with her boyfriend. This is why I always recommend counseling. You both need to figure out where things went wrong and avoid making the same mistake a second time.

I always feel sorry for kids who's parents are separated and one of them is shacking up. No way can this have a good affect on the kids.

This is a trauma and you need professional help.

Take care,

Rancher

 

[fuzziebutt]

And if she's gonna terminate one, that shows the value she puts on ANY of those children.

And I stand by that comment.

 

[mhwc56]

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[GibblyGiblets]

First of all thanks to all for your kind words, I did not want this to turn into a big ha-do, and have people fighting over my sake, it is not right.

I just feel as though I need some extra words from some kind people

I was on this site while thinking and so I said to myself, hey I'll ask these nice people what they think

That being said, it might be a good idea for you to find someone to talk to. I don't know your story, but it sounds like you have a lot to be angry about, and it doesn't sound like she is helpful. YOu have a lot to be hurt about too, that she terminated your shared child, but is eager to tell the world about a child with a man she hardly knows. It might be helpful for you to have a trained professional to work this through with. I can't imagine the pain you are going through AND taking care of your children and being their dad.

I actually, am not feeling all that bad, the relationship was doomed from the start, due to her wondering eyes, but I ignored it, and when our first child, Vence was born, I believed that to fix it, and concrete us together as a pair, alas it did not, when raven was born, I believed the same thing, alas, no change, the third child had no name, as it was only JUST confirmed by a doctor that she was pregnant.

having my two young children helps me ALOT watching them every day, knowing that when I wake in the morning, I have something to look forward to, something to say "hi, how was your day", someone to lay with and watch mindless television, teletubbies,barnie dora the explorer, hate them!, but my children like them, and so I watch those mindless shows with them.

I do talk to a very very good female friend of mine, who is very concerned about me as well, I tell her no need, I am fine.​

 

[sourland]

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[cupman]

We're only hearing half the story. I'm still skeptical.