Thoughts on stealing baby names?

[charliethezero]

So my husband and I have had a girl's name picked out for years and the entire family knew of it. My sister-in-law and I both got pregnant, I lost mine. They had been having trouble picking a name. Now it's a week to the due date and they announced they are going to use the name I picked no matter what. What are your thoughts?

 

[solomine]

If you're okay with it, it should be okay.

Do you still plan on using the name sometime in the future (some people might feel like it might cause bad luck or something superstitious or might just want a fresh start with a new name)?

If you're not okay with it, sounds like a total JERK MOVE because you "claimed" that name for years and ESPECIALLY because you lost your own child. What's your sister-in-law like? Can you reason with your brother about this?

I'm so sorry for your loss .

 

[charliethezero]

Yeah, I'm not okay with it and they know. It really hurts that they don't even care how it would make me feel. I have an almost two year old son and when we told her I was pregnant she started yelling "how dare you have one before me" with a few choice words. I guess that's the type of person she is.

 

[heartsizedfarm]

Your sister in law does not sound like a very compassionate person. What was the name you chose for a girl?

 

[solomine]

My goodness..

I'd be very hurt and angry as well.

Your sister-in-law sounds extremely, extremely self-centered. How has the rest of your family reacted to the way she behaves?

 

[Espresso]

Let her know how you feel. That's a b**** thing to do. I don'tcare how much someone loves you... tthey're not likely to be OK with you taking their name. Especially since you experienced a loss.... she's was a over the line. Way over.

 

[charliethezero]

She's technically my husband sister in law. His family has had 15 or so years getting used to her, we've only been married for 6. They think I'm over reacting and it's just a name. Pretty much for the last six years every nasty thing she said or did to me is my fault and I should try harder. They are an extremely close family, so no help there.

 

[heartsizedfarm]

Just to offer another perspective, I come from Scottish heritage where nobody really had a unique name all to themselves. You were always named after relatives. Fifteen boys going back four generations and only five names: Alexander, Ian, William, Andrew and Robert. Same with the girls: Jessie, Bessie, Sheila, Nanny, Mary and Roberta.

So you could still use that name you love for your next daughter whether your SIL has used it or not.

 

[charliethezero]

I could definitley see that if they were that type of family but they are not at all. We were just talking together about how much I wanted that name and a week later I find out through the mother-in-law about it.

 

[heartsizedfarm]

Do they know for sure they are having a girl?