Every day is hard, every day I miss AJ terribly as if I am missing a limb. Today is our anniversary coincidentally today is also the first weekend with out my roommate who was AJ's best friend as he just moved out to live with his girlfriend. So for the first time since it all happened i am alone it was bound to happen sometime I suppose. Anyway Today is the anniversary. of the happiest day of my life and although it is very bitter for me now I did want to post some pics of the person I once was and of us together and the perfect life I once had. I am aware that even though my bliss was short I was very happy for many years and I know some people never get that, and for every second I had with AJ I am grateful. Some pics are of our wedding & bachelor party and the others are either honey moon, or the last trip we took 8 days before the accident where we were in Bermuda celebrating our last "baby free vacation" Please I am not looking for sympathy here, not sure why I am even posting this, but I did want to show off some pics today. In a little while I will send my ds to my sisters and go to the cemetery to plant a new Christmas tree and have a picnic with AJ. Oh and please dont tell me I will find someone else and that I am young. I have no interest having tried dating a few times and really feel better when I can go around pretending like AJ is on some very long business trip that he will eventually return from (when I pass) . I guess normally I would walk over to my roomate's room and talk about AJ today but with him gone I needed some other outlet to release these feelings. Enjoy the pics my favorite pi of AJ taken by me on the way to Hawaii for our honeymoon. He is still wearing his wedding hat which he wore often (good thing I bought it rather than renting it with his tux ) The look he is giving me in this pic is just so typical of the loving expressions he would give me. Bachelor bachelorette party pics. Rather than having a separate party for each of us we had our party together. We rented the only Ford F150 Harley Davidson Pick-up stretch limo and piled all of our friends in it and headed to the nay-nay club. BTW that is my roommate in between me and AJ in the pic here is a few pics of the wedding. He was so handsome it was a blizzard that day and there was over 5 feet of snow on the ground and it was still coming down when we finally made it to the church. Although things were a little rough i was so happy the whole time that I did not care and thought it was amazing that people had really risked injury driving to celebrate it with us. every 6 months from the time we started dating AJ and I would take a vacation and get away from it all. We shared all of the same activities and loved the same sort of things so we always had the best time when it was just us. People used to say you should start saving for a family and our response was you oly live once. We did not realize how right we were and because we always did what we wanted and bought the toys we wanted when he died I had no regrets knowing we had squeezed a lifetime of living in the 7 years we were together. Our last trip was to Bermuda and I highly recommend elbow beach where we stayed for 2 weeks. By this time we had decided to start a family and I was just under 7 months preggers. I first met AJ when I was 4 years old. We had the same playmates and later as I got older I would trow rocks at him from my friends back yard which was right next to his. AJ used to say that he wanted to date me in high school but that I did not think he was cool enough, not true as I did not think about it at all in those days and never noticed that he liked me. It is funny how we can be with our soul mate years earlier and never know it. When I moved back to my home town in my 20's AJ found out and searched me out. he then made it a point for me to notice him which this time I did, and well we were together ever since.