Okay, pups, this is a freestyle poem I just whipped up in the last hour for my county's poetry contest whose deadline is tomorrow. 
So- should I revise anything?

So- should I revise anything?

ONCE
Once
We lived in peace
Once
The air was clean,
The seas were untamed
Once
The forest was populous
Wild,
Alive
Once
We were equal
All one-
Life.
Man
Animals
Water
Earth
Sky
Once
Now
Wars abound
Poverty thrives
Now
Freedom-
Forgotten
The air we-
Man, Animal, Plant-
Breathe
Is dirty.
The oceans-
Murky,
Polluted
Still
Now
The woodlands have
Paused
Twitches, scratches-
Abolished
Howls, snorts, hoots-
Silenced
Vegetation-
Withered.
The wind whistling through the willows
Is the sole
Occupant
Of the forest
Now
We
Are
Divided
Chasms have yawned
Canyons have opened
Rivers have split
Between man,
Animal,
And
Land
Forever
If we don't
Change
Once
Now
And
Forever.
~Me
Once
We lived in peace
Once
The air was clean,
The seas were untamed
Once
The forest was populous
Wild,
Alive
Once
We were equal
All one-
Life.
Man
Animals
Water
Earth
Sky
Once
Now
Wars abound
Poverty thrives
Now
Freedom-
Forgotten
The air we-
Man, Animal, Plant-
Breathe
Is dirty.
The oceans-
Murky,
Polluted
Still
Now
The woodlands have
Paused
Twitches, scratches-
Abolished
Howls, snorts, hoots-
Silenced
Vegetation-
Withered.
The wind whistling through the willows
Is the sole
Occupant
Of the forest
Now
We
Are
Divided
Chasms have yawned
Canyons have opened
Rivers have split
Between man,
Animal,
And
Land
Forever
If we don't
Change
Once
Now
And
Forever.
~Me