VENT:Secret Santa Gifting-Yuck!

[WriterofWords]

Quote:
Exactly

My class decided to have a gift exchange this year, they had to take home a permission slip explaining what was going on and that the parents would be be sure the gift provided was at a cost of $5 or less,, LESS. I also put in that note that homemade gifts were more than acceptable and my students and I discussed the meaning of the gift, not the monetary value. I told them flat out that if they were most concerned about the value than the meaning, do not take part. I had 6 girls and 6 boys take part, they all brought their gift, and on the day we exchanged no one was disappointed. I understand how the OP feels, and I do my best to make sure this does not happen in my classroom. One gift this year was a framed poem written by a male student. He wrote it, bought a $1.00 frame at a local store, decorated it on fancy paper from the classroom. The student that got that gift loved it. One girl crocheted a scarf for another student using yarn from the club stash so no money was spent at all. It was beautiful.
It's the meaning, not the cost.

 

[fuzziebutt]

I do apologise, I was just shocked at her. My children were the ones that couldn't afford to give out gifts at Christmas, and they were hurt when they were required to. Humiliation and social class are hard and unnecessary things for young children to learn, especially at Christmas.

 

[WriterofWords]

A side note as a teacher: 5 days of gift giving???? That is too much. One gift exchanged is more than adequate, I would really question requiring that 5 day bit.

 

[Carols Clucks]

With out knowing the economic situation of every parent in that class, I think it is hard to judge on what is cheap or expensive. If you have lots of money but don't like a class mate, giving your left overs can be cheap. But if you are broke and that came from your personal stash that you hoarded and hid away to last you the whole year (the candy) then it is expensive and valuable.


On the other hand, this might just be a child (the classmate) that has parents that give them everything and they have not learned the value of giving something to others. It might be useful to ask that the teacher think about having every child bring gift and pull a number to pick rather than the current system.


But, the OP should think about what she is teaching her children about gifts and value.

 

[WriterofWords]

Quote:
That is what I do, the number system works very well and I always check the gifts first too, when they are brought to me, that way I can suggest more thought might be needed, or if I know this student has financial issues we can find something in my stash that might be more appropriate.

 

[goldies99]

this teacher is trying to make something fun for the kids....
unfortunately not every child has the money or the knowledge of what they should give....and maybe the parents
don’t care about this because they are lazy...the child suffers....the child giving may be suffering embarrassment...or may
not care as they have learned that from the parents....this is where YOU come into play as a good parent....you are the one
who should NOT put so much into this...tell her this is just a fun thing the teacher does and not all children and parents
are as good at it as others....tell her your sorry she didn’t get a great gift and change the subject to something better...
offer her something special to do...take her to the dollar store or get her an ice-cream....teach her how lucky she is to have
the wonderful things she DOES have....teach her not to expect things from others, and she wont be disappointed....and a special note
to you....no one will ever love your child like YOU do!!!.....after this week, this will pass and be forgotten...and you will see just how
unimportant this really was...be happy your family is healthy and don’t sweat the small things...Merry Christmas to you!

 

[RaZ]

Quote:
True enough, we should be friendly and courteous to all people, whether member or not. However, I will stand behind my comments of pointing out the OP insensitivity and dis-courteous behaviour towards children, no less.

I hope this thread is shut down in quick order before I say what I really think of OP.

 

[chickmashnoon]

Now, now, Be nice! Everyone has that defensive reaction when their kid is dissappointed by life and our first instinct is to comfort our kids and tell them they deserve better. It may not be the best thing to do, but usually it is our first instinct. She was frustrated by her daughter's obvious unequal treatment i.e. the obviously "different" gifts. Sometimes it takes a bit to change a dissappointment into a learning experience, expecially when we have to explain to our children why life isn't fair. Was her comment a little shallow? Sure, but this was also a rant that I bet was written after seeing the sadness on her daughter's face. We all have petty moments. It's pretty human. Noone needs to get P.O.ed about it. It's not like she tracked down the bad gifter and berated him/her. With all the push about getting things for Christmas it's pretty easy to loose sight of the giving part of it.

Those without sin, please cast the first stone.

 

[MeatKing]

Quote:
True enough, we should be friendly and courteous to all people, whether member or not. However, I will stand behind my comments of pointing out the OP insensitivity and dis-courteous behaviour towards children, no less.

I hope this thread is shut down in quick order before I say what I really think of OP.

That's nice, not much better eh?
This year we are strugling, with enough gifts for each childs teacher. Everything adds up, and you don't know, what they have been through. Can you teach your child to see the positive? You know the mom, may have just had a baby, they just got laid off.. Yes the paper crumbled, but they tried to flatten it out, tried to make it nice.. Don't judge, that's what I would tell my girls.

 

[goldies99]

what does OP stand for????