Was I wrong? Parenting Question

[justbugged]

It is a very good thing that he has you and his dad now.

 

[sourland]

Mean? Maybe. Called for and probably effective. Absolutely.

Sometimes it takes a little meanness to get their attention.

Sourland Dad of 2

 

[Sonoran Silkies]

I think the question of whether it was mean or not depends on things like the outside temperature and how dirty he was. Was any warning given that he would have to use cold water next time? If it is really cold outside, and he is not really dirty, then there is no way I would say he should have to take a freezing shower. He would instead be drivrived of having a shower. If the weather is reasonable, by all means have him use cold water.

I think that you need to be close at hand to remind him to get into the shower. Perhaps give him some ideas of better scheduling such as start the shower, brush your teeth, use the bathroom, and by then the water should be hot. Maybe add in getting his clothes to change into if more time is needed. Don't let him turn or or sit down in front of the television or computer--say, "not now." A couple of weeks of close supervision may help him develop a new habit that is more hot water friendly.

 

[LegginMF12]

Quote:
1. He is 10 going on 11, not 5 going on 6. He has had the exact same schedule for 19 months. Get up, eat breakfast, brush teeth, take shower, get dressed, make bed, get school work and back pack THEN watch cartoons.
2. He likes NOT taking showers, it would be reward.
3. This has been an issue for over a year
4. Temps were in the low 60's and raining, I did turn on the heater in the house.
5. I HAD TO TAKE A FREEZING COLD SHOWER for like the 4th time. Figured I would share the experience with him.

 

[Iowa Roo Mom]

Quote:
1. He is 10 going on 11, not 5 going on 6. He has had the exact same schedule for 19 months. Get up, eat breakfast, brush teeth, take shower, get dressed, make bed, get school work and back pack THEN watch cartoons.
2. He likes NOT taking showers, it would be reward.
3. This has been an issue for over a year
4. Temps were in the low 60's and raining, I did turn on the heater in the house.
5. I HAD TO TAKE A FREEZING COLD SHOWER for like the 4th time. Figured I would share the experience with him.

Well that isn't fair to you, but....


Sounds like a fitting punishment for him. Like redhen said, you could always get a timer and tell him he has XX minutes to take a hot shower or the water will run cold. Or, you could do like my momma did to me a few times... if he takes too long, make him put some shorts on and finish under the hose outside. But that was before any old Joe could cry "child abuse" and have you arrested.

Good luck!

 

[redhen]

Quote:
X 2!!!

 

[redhen]

He needs to learn PERSONAL responsibility.....thats why i suggested the timer.. (so YOU arent the BAD guy... its HIS fault for the cold shower..and theres noone else to blame, but himself..)
Hes NOT a baby,...he KNOWS... trust me.

Doesnt matter if its 30 outside or 80 , its all on him........ Its simple, if you let the water run, you WILL have to take a COLD shower....its NOT fun....
He'll catch on quick.. trust me.
Easy Peasy..

 

[Southernbelle]

Agree with other posters - it was natural consequences to his actions and very fitting to the circumstances. I'm a big believer in natural consequences as natural punishment for teaching kids how the world works.

 

[ChickenAlgebra]

Nope, he did the "work" to get a cold shower, so he gets to take a cold shower.

Another possible solution for your problem, have him shower at night before bed. He can take the nice cold shower that he's earned, you can take a nice warm shower in the morning.

 

[Sir Birdaholic]

I think a new house rule is called for....... No leaving the bathroom for any reason while the water is running,....... unless the water is on fire!