What are you canning now?

[KentuckyMom]

@rancher hicks
You are not saying more than you should.
I stay home with our children and home school them. Two have graduated now and both of those children have good jobs. The other three are grade school age. I worked before we had children and have had to work part- time occasionally over the years when my husband has been without work for a time. Over all though, my husband and I made the decision, years ago that my work would be at home. There is always plenty to do and more than enough to keep me busy. Money is tight, but creative living helps us survive and we as a family are much better for it. The Lord has blessed us through it all even through the rough patches. My husband's co- workers ( many are women) cannot understand. "Do you keep your wife chained up at home?" they ask. They don't understand that this is a choice we made together years ago when we were first married. I suppose ,really, it was something we talked about before marrying. The Proverbs 31 woman is someone we can aspire to be but it is not an easy task...

 

[WthrLady]

Being a great mom and wife isn't easy, and it isn't for everybody.

Can open, worms everywhere.

It all comes to personal choice. I couldn't stand to have my child raised by someone else. There is time for me now and time for me when he leaves the nest. For the record, I have advanced scientific degrees, and have been crazy happy married for 22 years. I am also a rockin' cook, mom, and homemaker, and I homeschool (due to location and poor local school systems) a high school age child, who made Eagle Scout at age 13, all on top of moving every two years for my husband's job.

Sadly, our society doesn't see mothering as a valuable contributor to society. For the most part, they are stereotyped as do nothing, shopping, wine drinking, bon-bon eating, lazy noncontributing people. A short sighted stereotype to be sure. Why is staying home and running a home seen as a do nothing job? I assure you (the royal 'you'), it is not. Lol!

I have friends who work outside the home, are miserable, complain constantly about home and family, their marriage suffers, and their entire paycheck goes towards putting their child in a care system while they are at work. It makes no sense to me what-so-ever.

I have much younger cousins, in their mid 30s, who have decided to put their careers before family or children. They and their husbands have grown apart as each go their own ways, expanding their power careers. Now, they decide they want to add children to the mix and are finding that their ages are hindering the process. One that managed to have a geriatric pregnancy, over the age of 29, gave up the stay-at-home mom idea after 6 months. She has gone back to work, the child is in daycare, (her money along with it, and she is now pregnant with number 2. The other has no children, they aren't even home the same hours, don't eat together, sleep the same hours, nothing. I am not sure how that's even a marriage. Two other cousins are in their late 20s and have no inclination of marriage, which is fine.

I was raised by an amazing 'could-do-anything' stay at home mom. My sister and I are the same way: cooking, sewing, knitting, roofing, plumbing, building, electrical, carpentry, pour concrete, garden, canning, and if we don't know how to do what needs done, we'll learn and do it.

I'm certainly not saying one way is right or wrong, but when a chosen path is only destructive to home and family, what is the point?

We had a new family move to the next homestead over. When I asked what she did to keep herself busy, she hung her head and practically whispered that she was a stay at home mom. I replied, 'OUTSTANDING! Welcome to the neighborhood!' She perked right up.

Sure there are days when I see my counterparts, male and female, getting a paycheck or recognition, and it hits like a blow to the spirit, but then I start to wonder what they gave up to get there. That decision would not make me happy. If it makes them happy, well, ok then.


I hope I didn't derail the thread further, or turn over anyone's apple cart, or put to much vinegar in the pickle jar.

To bring us back on topic, nothing is going into the jars right now, just out.

I did cook a pancake in a large cake pan yesterday and will not make individual pancakes again! It was like discovering electricity! Lol!

 

[sunflower4you]

Just to throw in an alternative viewpoint...my husband stays home with our kids and homeschools them, as well. It worked out this way because my income was so much more than his that it made sense for him to be the one at home. We still share the chores. He puts supper on the table every night, but I help with laundry and cleaning. I take care of the finances and go to all the kids' appointments with him. I spend a lot of quality time with my children by going home for lunch every day and coming home early in the evenings. It is role reversal, but it works for us.

 

[hennible]

This has been an excellent discussion thanks for starting it rancher.

 

[rancher hicks]

@rancher hicks I get what you are saying, but it all depends on the people. I am not a baby person and it turned out that neither is my husband. I was OK with having kids, but it was not my burning passion. So we left it up to God have no kids for me to take care of. I hate housework. I need people around me. So, being at home makes me crazy, I don't notice it but it makes it hard on him. Plus what we want to do costs money.

I have lots of mottos as you will learn. One is "Not having kids doesn't make you a bad person, having kids you don't want does." If you and your husband don't want kids that's just fine with me.

I hate when I read Dear Amy, My daughter and her husband don't want kids and I really want to be a grand parent, what can I do to change their mind? OR this one really gets me big time, We've been married X number years and when we got married he told me he didn't want kids but I thought after we got married he'd change his mind. What can I do to get him to change his mind?

I'm grateful you recognized you're not a kid person. IMO many who have kids aren't either but didn't have to good sense to admit it.

Of course on the other hand the reverse is not to be so anti kid you can't be friends with those who do. Me? I like kids or not. Depends on the day.

Really? I like kids whose parents like kids.

 

[rancher hicks]

I'm not a people person and I am happy to stay home with my two little boys... Besides that, childcare would cost more than I can earn anyway... Yep all depends on the people...

Moms and Dads who love kids are the best, Moms and Dads.

Like I said it's okay to not want kids, but don't put down those who do and don't put down those who don't.

Another of my Mottos is, "If I knew grandchildren were so much fun, I'd have had them first". Picking up the GD from preschool and Lord have mercy can she talk.

Makes no never mind to me. She can talk all she wants.

When DW and I used to go out by ourselves the hostess would say "Smoking or non Smoking? " I'd say " No Kids". We have four and I came to get away from them, not sit next to someone elses.

 

[rancher hicks]

Just to throw in an alternative viewpoint...my husband stays home with our kids and homeschools them, as well. It worked out this way because my income was so much more than his that it made sense for him to be the one at home. We still share the chores. He puts supper on the table every night, but I help with laundry and cleaning. I take care of the finances and go to all the kids' appointments with him. I spend a lot of quality time with my children by going home for lunch every day and coming home early in the evenings. It is role reversal, but it works for us.

My son in law is a stay at home Dad. Works for them, so who am I to criticize. DD is a teacher, he couldn't find a job. That may change after the second one comes. They offered for us to come and live with them, but he's a Red Sox fan.

 

[KentuckyMom]

This has been an excellent discussion thanks for starting it rancher.

Did you notice that six of us replied almost simultaneously? It has been a good discussion.

 

[Raech]

Hubby lost his job when our oldest was 6 months old, we were both previously working together in the same store. We pulled him from daycare and daddy became super dad for 3 years while I worked 6 days a week and barely made the bills. When I got pregnant with #2 we both worked for 6 months as my hours got cut due to government funding. Hubby got a better paying job than I could have, so I stayed home and watched a couple of his co-workers children for extra money. I did miss all the "big people" conversations I used to have at work, but we made a family choice to keep the limited income so the boys could be at home. Now that I have started being a home maker my skills have expaned, I learned how to make bread, crochet, and expanded on my canning and gardening; I am proud to say my black thumb is now green. Since I know how expensive daycare can be, I decided to work with the family on what they can afford, so for each child I watched in the past the rates have all been different because the parents came up with a number that we could both work on. We also have a small group of friends that we trade stuff with: mechanic work for salmon/buffalo meat; yard work for pet bunny; garden space for labor. Im not going to lie, laying on the couch eating bon bons would be nice, and no my dishes aren`t always done but my kids are happy, played with and learning. I get the comments from family and friends that I should go back to work, how I am throwing my job history down the drain, or how I should at least go to college while I am at home. But the way my husband and I look at it, is from a couple of angles: cost of daycare vs my potental income(it would pay for daycare), stress on us and the kids(oldest had seperation problems, youngest was breastfeeding), and the amount of time we would actually see each other. I may go stir crazy some days, but I would be calling daycare everyday worrying about my kids (yes I am that mom). I can take my youngest wherever I want to since I don`t have to work, and we buy less produce since we have started a garden, something that would have been hard with both of us working full time jobs. We are not going for the CEO jobs, or even trying to climb the ladder, we are happy having no debt(until we buy a house), having our hobbies and a couple trips a year due to hubby's hobby.

We have plenty of time to work for the rest of our days, after the kids are out of the house. Missing my oldest son's first mile stones was too much for me, and if was possible for hubby to stay home as well, I know he would.

 

[wyoDreamer]

I just canned 7 pints of apple pie filling. Apples were $1 a pound in the store. I moved here too late to get any good apples from the orchards. I had to can some apple pie filling, the larder is empty and I gotta get ready for pudgy pies at the campsites.
Once again, I used the brown sugar pie filling recipe that I got from this site. It is so good and I like that it is not like the canned stuff from the store, which is what the Ball Book recipe tastes too close to.