Some of us just realize that marriage isn't about what
we want. I certainly don't have to resort to manipulation. Marriage is the
most wonderful relationship you could ever have. I can't even describe the wonderfulness it is in my life! It is a partnership and if my DH doesn't approve of something then I don't disrespect him and go over his head and say "who cares what you think, I am a grown woman and I will do what I want" (or vice versa)- that attitude my friends, is why so many end in divorce.
My DH has had plenty of things come up that I didn't approve of or care for. I sure am glad he doesn't disrespect me and my feelings and say "who cares what you think, I do what I want because I am an adult and I can". Things, no matter how small, have to be decided together IMO - what is small to one person may be a big deal to another, everyone has different personalities.
Maybe I am a little old fashioned or that I am a christian woman and the word of God tells me that my DH is the head of our family and he gets to be the final decision maker. He is not some boss of me, he loves me and respects me and he has given me a life I could never have dreamed of having and given the opportunity to be able to do what I love with my life....work with horses and animals and stay at home to raise my children. I respect my DH as a man and the head of our family and the very intelligent man that he is.
My DH tells me no or advises me against things at times (most concerning taking in more animals - we have over 100 here - over a 200$/mo feed bill too that he works hard to earn to pay) SO, not always are our DHs just being controlling and mean to us when they aren't in favor of what we want. And this goes both ways with spouses.
Sad that other women think men are just controlling their poor little wives when they are doing what God programed them to do - to be our provider, protector, and the head of our family. With that, your DHs are to love and cherish you like no other, mine sure does and makes me feel his love every single day of my life. Certainly, there are violent and abusive controlling men but I doubt the OPs DH is one of those...just one who isn't into chickens (like tons of people in this world) and maybe is a little jealous of his wifes time. That isn't a horrible thing, that means they have things to work on and work out....and if you go off intentionally doing what a spouse doesn't approve of because you
can then you aren't really being an asset to your own marriage either. I would never throw away my exceptionally wonderful DH over him telling me no over something because I sure have told him no on things he has wanted!! JMO
Sorry but I wanted to clear that up to ones who just don't understand that concept -
The OP should find ways to mediate with her own DH and they have to decide together as a team what to do. If he is resistant and she doesn't agree with him, well, she still has some work to do with him and most likely he will come around in time after he sees personally the joy his family is getting out of what they are wanting.
