Fun thread!
I'm not sure if these would be considered complaints, as they are more in the line of "requests" which are communicated by the chicken to the human via the combined use of body language (mainly stepping around) and brief, one-eyed stares. Occasional opinions (or complaints) are voiced, but usually only amongst themselves.
Some of their unspoken requests as follows:
- A wet tree stump in their run to provide an additional crowing perch and perhaps some tasty bugs
- A new bag of cheese, preferably the larger shreds, mozzarella is best
- Mealworm cakes available for purchase from only one store in town
- Additional scoops of sand added to their dust bath because it is getting low from kicking most of the sand out during overly-enthusiastic preceding dust bath sessions. The bag of sand weighs 50 pounds and I myself weigh in just over 110 pounds but, in their estimation, more sand is required sooner rather than later.
- Daily walks around the garage should not be accompanied by any humans, dogs, or cats. They should have the immediate perimeter to themselves and be allowed to poop freely without being trailed by scary paper towels.
- More mirrors, because two aren’t enough and there should be more chickens in the mirrors.
- Activities involving white moths and the hunting thereof.
- Practice of the common courtesy of removing human hands from the feeding area at all times.
- A “do not disturb” sign for the coop door to restrict rude humans from peeking inside during private times such as nesting or sleeping
- Large-curd cottage cheese (not small curd)
All I can do is my best to appease them
