What is This????

I was ordering my chickens.....I was going to get a dozen. But then I decided that was a dozen hens so the rooster was kinda extra and didn't count. Nor did the free chick the hatchery included if I agreed to donate her eggs to someone in need. Certainly that didn't count. And then there was the fact that I there were a couple of breeds where I ordered two of the same was more like one each. So if you actually want to count there will be 18 chicks but really it's only a dozen....

That's chicken math.
a rationalization tool for chicken addiction. say limit of 6 so 6 bantams = 1 + 5 cockerels (for eating)= still at 1+ 4 standard breed layers= 5 + 10 peepers (but some might not survive and they are small and you can't have just 1)= 6+ x number of eggs in the bator but never count your chickens before they hatch so you get 25 chickens and who knows how many hatching eggs and still only REALLY have 6.

or is my math off?
Chicken Math Conversation:

Husband: 'What are you doing pulling in to the Feed Store, You JUST GOT FEED Yesterday' ( He spys the ASK FOR BABY CHICKS banner)
Oh NONONONONO! You have 6 at home in the brooder that are doing great! No!'

Me: 'I know I do but I read on the BYC that pullets feather quicker then cockerels, and two of mine are obviously still fluffy butts so they're probably cockerels and you said SIX Chickens! So I need two more to make it even see? And then I'll have my six chickens if I get 2 more'.

Husband: "How do you figure that? That makes EIGHT!'

Me: 'Noooooo, if I have two that are cockerels then it's still SIX!' ( I walk in the store with Husband trailing behind me)

Feed Store Guy: 'Can I help You?

Me: 'Baby Chicks?'

Husband: 'You can help. See this woman? This is my wife, she has a disease that makes her crazy for Chickens, Take a good look at her, infact take a picture with your cell phone and post it up somewhere..........because if you sell this woman a SINGLE Chicken, you know the kind with two bitty wings, fluff and two legs?, a SINGLE Chicken......then I'm coming back and returning it to you!' Because she's so addicted she can't ADD Chickens right? I know it's not really her fault but we have to help her through this. So....no chicken sales to her..........k?

Feed Store Guy: (Laughing hysterically) Yeah we've seen it before.....no problem........can I sell her feed though?

Husband: 'Sure'

Me: 'Chicks?"

Feed Store Guy: 'Thursday'

Me: 'Any Orps?'

Feed Store Guy: ' Barred Rock & Rhode Island Reds'

Me: 'Ooooooooooooo Barred Rocks..........might be nice for a few meat birds...........hmmmmmmm'

Husband: That's STILL more then 6 chickens!

Me: 'Oh don't be silly, they'd be BR's they don't count'! I'll be back Thursday!'

Yes the following was an ACTUAL conversation and he's planning on taking my keys tomorrow. That is Chicken Math. They're all doing so well and what's a couple more? Besides......The Police don't find Grandma buried in a house full of newspapers and Chickens now do they? Nope it's cats, always cats...........long as it's chickens.......we're good!
My chicken math:

I want a new breed of chick...so I plan to buy a couple 4...but I think surely I should double it because at least 50% will be roosters and I don't keep roos...so then i'm up to 8...then I think...there is always a 20% loss...so tack on 2 more...that equals 2-3 hens...right?

At least that is how I rationalize it with my husband!!
For me it's always...

Well, I got the silkies for the BOYS for PETS, so they don't count... and the americaunas and the barred rocks... I got those because those are YOUR favorite breed, honey. So... I really don't have any chickens at all!
Ok, My older Marans are still laying, albeit, sporadically. So, I tell my Darling husband. Looks like one of my FAVORITE hens might be on the way to one foot in the grave. She always lays such huge dark eggs.. I want to replace her.. So, I started collecting her eggs. I have about 8 so far and my incubator (an old Hovabator forced) fan kicked the bucket. Well, now.. A fan cost about 30.00 plus expedited shipping, another 30.00.. I might as well buy a NEW one.. (Never mind the fact that it's over 100.00.. I COULD buy some Cuckoo or Black Copper chicks already started for WAY less).. But, you know.. You gotta hatch those from your beloved hen, so you buy a new incubator, and spend more than you planned because heck, you need the fancy hygrometer/thermometer and the auto turner and all the other bells and whistles.. . Then, out of the 10, you might get 5 cockerels. So, they don't count. They are going to be for the soup pot, or sold to some one for that reason. Then of course.. The old hen is Still laying and in the mean time, I bought a trio of Silkies, but they don't count cuz their little.. OK, so they're laying eggs now. Gotta set some of those.. Wannasee what colour comes out of that batch..
Never mind the fact that now the button quail are in full swing laying and you have a dozen eggs a week.. Gotta set those too.. why waste? Those don't count, because the feed store's been asking when I will have some fuzzy baby bumble bees to sell.. Now, I heard that Texas A&M's Cotournix are BIG fat juicy quail that people are paying 50.00 a pair in these here parts. maybe I need to set some of those eggs, but you know, they don't count because they aren't chickens..
This is convoluted math of a chicken addict...

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