Why is it so hard?

WriterofWords

Has Fainting Chickens
14 Years
Dec 25, 2007
13,212
86
476
Chaparral, New Mexico
Why is it so hard for some to tell the ones closest to them they love them? I was not raised in a demonstrative family, but my son and I never leave each other or hang up the phone without telling the other one that we love them. My brother is the opposite, and his wife is no better at it. My nephew that is in the Navy now is in Pensacola and we are in constant communication, we never hang up or stop texting without saying I love you. He told me just now that he hasn't heard his mom or dad or his siblings say it to him in so long.
I know a lot of people say they show their love, not say it, but please make sure those you are trying to show your love to know it!
My nephew is lucky, he has a lot of people who love him, but he needs to know it, we all need to know we are loved by someone.
 
Ken and I tell each "I love you" all the time. I tell my son, who is almost 20, I fuff foo. When he was small he couldn't say it right and it stuck and he still says it to me.
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I am a demonstrative mother, my parents where not, I tell my DH and my children I love them every day............don't see a problem with being demonstrative in letting my family know how much I love them...............
 
In my family we pride ourselves on being tough cookies, I must have heard "don't be such a pansy/wussy/panty-waist" about 40 million times growing up. We never really started saying "I love you" until my parents moved 3 states away.

But it never bothered me. I didn't need to hear it said, I knew my parents loved me because of their actions. If anyone messed with me, they turned into angry grizzlies in a matter of minutes.
 
Quote:
after I read your post, I wondered if we were related......my parents weren't demostrative either but I have got to give hugs and tell my DH and DS that I love them. God forbid this would happen but if something happened to me after I had parted company with one of my loved ones, I would want the last thing that I said to them to be "I love you"
 
My family (mother,sisters,aunts,cousins) always say I love you to each other. My husband asked me one day, if we really mean it or if it is just a habit. His family is not like that at all. Our children are taking after me, and we all really do all mean it
 
see, I'm big on hugs, but bad with words. I hate goodbyes and love you's are close to the same thing the way most people use it.
 
I dont know. Sometimes I have this huge fear of it with some people. Like my dad. I dont know why and I kinda laugh at it sometimes.

Even when I was younger I FEARED it. Id count 1, 2, 3 Daddy I love you! ...and even that came out so fast hed kinda look at me funny but always return it. haha
He tells me a lot more now that Ive moved out of the house and when he does you can really hear it in his voice.

My SO and I tell each other I love you everytime we get off the phone..
Even if its just a 2 second convo about something silly as butter.
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My mom and I use to exchange it all the time. Hers always seemed to hurt her on the inside. Like a I miss you so much I love you...but she was drunk during 90% of our convos..



I love yous and even hugs to people are just odd to me. I always get weird when people hug me. I dont know why..
I like hugs and all but I never know when its appropriate to give them, or to whom to give them to. hm

I tell my sons I love them before bed every night
 
I know what you mean WriterofWords ...my sister is that way too....I am the one that likes hugs and says I love you. I always say it to my kids (29 & 32)when we talk or email. maybe it was she was 4 and I was 11 when our mother walked out...so growing up without a mother I'm sure is part of it.
 

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