Can I give this to my teacher without coming across a dork?

[Freckle Face Farm]

kargo I think you are a very sweet person..
My daughter and her girl friend are very close with 1 of there teachers..They have her phone# and talk to her all the time..On college night guess who showed up to help with all the applications..
My daughter got the flu then her girl friend first thing they did was call the teach to get it checked...I beleive my daughter has a friend for life and it is nice to know she has someone to talk too..
Hope this helps!

 

[Chickerdoodle13]

I think it is very sweet of you to want to get close to this teacher. I don't think you are being weird about it, but I do think it would be wise to speak to a counselor about the recent tragic events you've had to face. No one should have to feel like they need to face that stuff alone. I've never had to see a counselor myself, but I work with many of them here at my college and they are all very nice people. I'm sure your school conselors are very nice as well and you may want to check it out, even if you bring your friend with you the first time just to meet the counselor.

When I was in 5th grade I became very friendly with a few teachers who worked there. Some of them weren't even my teachers and I still got very close to them. At the end of the year (Some at the end of 6th grade because I had the teachers for two years) I asked for their phone numbers and addresses so I could keep in touch. Some of them I still email and talk to, even though they are much older than me. As I get older, I feel like there is less and less of an age gap. The one lady who was once my tech teacher now treats me like I'm just another friend of hers. (mind you, I am in college now)

While I agree that is is never good to get too close to a teacher, especially while they are your teacher, there is nothing wrong with remaining friends for years after. Teachers have often been my best mentors! I think the picture was fine to give to your teacher. I would often draws pictures for HS teachers and they would stick them on the wall behind their desk.

 

[Felicia]

Quote:

This is really good advice


When I was younger, around your age - I would get extremely attached to people. After going the opposite way for a while and not trusting or getting close to anyone, I am now starting to become more attached to people. It can be good and bad. Sometimes it can hurt you, but for the most part it is very rewarding to be loyal and a good friend. You definitely have an amazing caring heart.

Keep it up. Don't let anyone take that from you. Your amazing, and don't ever forget it.

 

[sred98]

Kargo,

I'm glad she liked your picture and that you gave it to her, even though some people thought it might be strange.

I think that using the word "obsessed" is really strong. I think that she is filling a void that your dad left when he died, and it is natural for you to worry about her. You have both made obvious attempts to reach out to each other as friends, and I think that is important as long as you are comfortable with that. If it ever feels uncomfortable for you, take a few steps back and re-evaluate the relationship.

I think that maybe some of the people that have uneasy feelings on here about your relationship with your teacher might not have been following what all has happened to you this year. You've finally got some good friends (have you had your sleepover, yet?) and you have a teacher that is going out of her way to make you feel important, responsible, and like you are worthy of being loved.

I don't think that it is a coincidence that as your friendship with this teacher grew, so did your relationship with people your own age. You now have TWO friends, when at the beginning of the school year, you had none.

Even your posts are coming across much more relaxed and more like a girl your age should, rather than upset and brooding all the time. Don't let people make you feel bad about an innocent friendship. They might not understand that your teacher made an effort to befriend you, and that exchanging pictures, drawings, or little things like that do make a difference when you haven't had a ton of friends, or feel isolated because of everything you've been through.

You don't have to be the best artist in the world to make someone's day.

What you did is from the heart. You just wanted her to smile, and I'm sure seeing the sun with the sunglasses on did just that!

Just remember that there are a lot of parents on here and not every adult has a child's best interest at heart. They are just worried. It is nothing against you.

If someone is PM'ing you and being rude or mean, report it to an Administrator immediately. You are a minor and no adult should be PM'ing you. Period.

Shelly

 

[kargo]

I think it was sweet, Kargo! I bet she was very tickled to know you gals were concerned about her.

Thank you for the nice comment.

"there is nothing wrong with drawing a picture for your teacher. I think it is cute and I wish there were more teachers and students with that kind of caring. Just know that she will only be your teacher this year and will have to move on. That being said I don't think it is obsessive or anything like that. I think it is really nice that you like your teacher that much."


Thank you for the kindness.

"kargo I think you are a very sweet person..
My daughter and her girl friend are very close with 1 of there teachers..They have her phone# and talk to her all the time..On college night guess who showed up to help with all the applications..
My daughter got the flu then her girl friend first thing they did was call the teach to get it checked...I beleive my daughter has a friend for life and it is nice to know she has someone to talk too..
Hope this helps! "

Thank you. That was very nice advice.

Chickerdoodle13-Thank you. That was great advice.

"When I was younger, around your age - I would get extremely attached to people. After going the opposite way for a while and not trusting or getting close to anyone, I am now starting to become more attached to people. It can be good and bad. Sometimes it can hurt you, but for the most part it is very rewarding to be loyal and a good friend. You definitely have an amazing caring heart. Keep it up. Don't let anyone take that from you. Your amazing, and don't ever forget it."

Thanks.

"Kargo,

I'm glad she liked your picture and that you gave it to her, even though some people thought it might be strange.

I think that using the word "obsessed" is really strong. I think that she is filling a void that your dad left when he died, and it is natural for you to worry about her. You have both made obvious attempts to reach out to each other as friends, and I think that is important as long as you are comfortable with that. If it ever feels uncomfortable for you, take a few steps back and re-evaluate the relationship.

I think that maybe some of the people that have uneasy feelings on here about your relationship with your teacher might not have been following what all has happened to you this year. You've finally got some good friends (have you had your sleepover, yet?) and you have a teacher that is going out of her way to make you feel important, responsible, and like you are worthy of being loved.

I don't think that it is a coincidence that as your friendship with this teacher grew, so did your relationship with people your own age. You now have TWO friends, when at the beginning of the school year, you had none.

Even your posts are coming across much more relaxed and more like a girl your age should, rather than upset and brooding all the time. Don't let people make you feel bad about an innocent friendship. They might not understand that your teacher made an effort to befriend you, and that exchanging pictures, drawings, or little things like that do make a difference when you haven't had a ton of friends, or feel isolated because of everything you've been through.

You don't have to be the best artist in the world to make someone's day. What you did is from the heart. You just wanted her to smile, and I'm sure seeing the sun with the sunglasses on did just that!

Just remember that there are a lot of parents on here and not every adult has a child's best interest at heart. They are just worried. It is nothing against you.

If someone is PM'ing you and being rude or mean, report it to an Administrator immediately. You are a minor and no adult should be PM'ing you. Period."

I agree completely. I do not think I'm in any way obsessed. I just like her a lot. WHy not? She's nice. I want to be nice back. People on her emake it seem like being nice is a crime. My teachers really odn't mind me. They let me sit at the faculty table yesterday when my friend wasn't there and one asked me and another student if we wanted to go see a movie with her sometime. (Which, by the way, in case anyone is thinking is weird, it's not. My mom's fine with it. I go out to dinner with my mom and teachers sometimes. It's not a bad thing.)

Maybe so. That makes sense. (And by the way, no, we haven't. Apparently my friend has breathing problems at night and has to wear and oxygen ask. Consequently she doesn't usually stay over at people's houses at night.

Thanks. Heh. I know I'm not talented in the art department, but I tried my best.

I know. I think the people that are telling me to "get some help" are trying to break that friendship I have, though. That's not something I'm willing to do. I'd be really upset. You're right. I think she is filling a void to a certain extent. Not in a sense that I'm using her, but she is kind of good at cheering me up when I'm sad or just aying something nice. I like that a lot.

Okay. I will.

 

[Nyrial]

one asked me and another student if we wanted to go see a movie with her sometime.

Actually socializing with teachers outside of school can often be against their rules and code of conduct. I wouldn't go to the movies with one while I was still at the school. If the wrong person saw you there with them, they could get disciplined and/or fired.

As for the getting attached part.. I had a teacher in high school that I got very attached to, and I ate lunch in her room almost every day.. I had a lot of issues with myself as a teenager, and even now.. to an extent. It takes a good teacher to realize when a student needs someone, especially as overworked and underpaid as they are today. So I don't think it's weird at all. Even so, if you've just gone through a loss, you need more than a filler, so definitely talk to your school counselor. They're not just there for people who are headcases, and a lot of times they can recommend good ways to outlet.

Unfortunately in today's society, we're programmed to think the worst of any good thing, and take even the best of intentions and twist it in our own heads. That's why it seems weird.


Edited for grammatical stinkage..​

 

[Boyd]

What is the Definition of a Dork?

Doing
Otherwise
Realistic
Kindness

 

[kargo]

I'm glad I'm not the only one who likes/d to socialize with teachers. I liek all teachers. I have just taken to this one a little mroe than some of the others.

That's cool. I guyess what I meant by dork here was "Am I going to make everyone think I'm obsessed?" Apparently the answer is yes.

 

[sred98]

Quote:
Not everyone!

Go back through and read...I think you have more support than people thinking you're a "dork". And the ones that are concerned, are mainly just trying to protect you. Sometimes people in authority (teachers, bosses, etc) abuse that authority. You're smart enough to know what's crossing a line. Neither one of you have done that. It's a mutual friendship built on respect. That's obviously something that you and your teacher appreciate.

Shelly

 

[Boyd]

Quote:
Not everyone!

Go back through and read...I think you have more support than people thinking you're a "dork". And the ones that are concerned, are mainly just trying to protect you. Sometimes people in authority (teachers, bosses, etc) abuse that authority. You're smart enough to know what's crossing a line. Neither one of you have done that. It's a mutual friendship built on respect. That's obviously something that you and your teacher appreciate.

Shelly

Besides, you may be like a little sister - daughter type figure in her eyes, you never know