Clean Blonde Jokes!!!

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A blonde calls her boyfriend and says, 'Please come over here and help
me. I have a killer jigsaw puzzle, and I can't figure out how to get
started.'

Her boyfriend asks, 'What is it supposed to be when it's finished?'

The blonde says, 'According to the picture on the box, it's a rooster.'

Her boyfriend decides to go over and help with the puzzle...

She lets him in and shows him where she has the puzzle spread all over
the table.

He studies the pieces for a moment, then looks at the box, then turns to
her and says,

'First of all, no matter what we do, we're not going to be able to
assemble these pieces into anything resembling a rooster.'

He takes her hand and says, 'Second, I want you to relax. Let's have a
nice cup of tea, and then ..' he said with a deep sigh, . . .. . .. .




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'Let's put all the Corn Flakes back in the box.'

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Do you know what a 710 is ?
A few days ago I was having some work done at my local garage. A blonde came in and asked for a seven-hundred-ten.
We all looked at each other and another customer asked, 'What is a
seven-hundred-ten?
She replied, 'You know, the little piece in the middle of the engine, I have lost it and need a new one..' She went on to say that she did not know
exactly what it was, but this piece had always been there. The mechanic gave her a piece of paper and a pen and asked her to draw what the piece looked like. She drew a circle and in the middle of it wrote 710.
He then took her over to another car which had its hood up and asked 'Is there a 710 on this car?She pointed and said, 'Of course, its right there.' If you're not sure what a 710 is, scroll down:










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Blonde Joke:


In a high school civics class, they were discussing the qualifications for becoming President of the United States. The requirements are pretty simple. The candidate must be a natural born citizen and at least 35 years old.
A blonde girl in the class piped up and began complaining about how unfair it was to require the candidate to be a natural born citizen. In her opinion, that made it impossible for many qualified people to run for the office. She went on and on, wrapping up her argument with "What makes a natural born citizen more qualified to be President than one born by C-Section?"
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Three blonde friends died together in a car wreck. They found themselves standing in front of the pearly gates with St. Peter. He told them that before they could enter heaven, they had to tell him what Easter was about.
The first blonde said, "Easter is a big holiday where we give thanks, have a big feast and eat turkey."
"Nooooo," said St. Peter. "You don't get in."
The second blonde said, "Easter is the holiday that we celebrate Jesus' being born of the virgin and give gifts to each other."
"Nooooo," said St. Peter. "You don't get in, either."
The third blonde said, "Well, I know what Easter is all about. Easter is a Christian holiday which coincides with the Jewish Passover. After Jesus celebrated Passover with His disciples, He was betrayed by Judas and turned over to the Romans. They crucified Him on a cross. After He died, they buried him in a tomb and put a huge boulder in front of it."
"Very good!" said St. Peter.
The blonde continued. "Now, every year, the Jews roll the stone away and Jesus comes out. If He sees his shadow, we have 6 more weeks of basketball."
St. Peter fainted!
 
lol.



Three blondes were walking through the forest when they came upon a set of tracks.
The first blonde said, "Those are deer tracks."
The second blonde said, "No, those are elk tracks."
The third blonde said, "You're both wrong, those are moose tracks."
The blondes were still arguing when the train hit them.
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How do you keep a blonde busy for hours?
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A beautiful blond decides to start a handyman business after having some work done around her house because the guy said he makes tons of money. So she gets business cards made and puts signs on her car. So she goes into this rich neighborhood and knocks on the door of this huge house with a huge wrap around porch. So a guy answers the door as asks what she wants. She tells him her business and he thinks for a minute, gee I was thinking about repainting my porch and even have the paint. How much would you charge ? She looks around and says how about $400? He says OK. So an hour goes buy and then she knocks on the door. Guy comes to the door and she tells him that she is all done. The guy can't believe it, wow that's great he says. She says I even did two coats. So he starts to hand her the money....... looks down in the driveway to see his newly painted Porsche.
 
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