Dad Jokes😂

[Jester57]

I think this is it, but when I try it it doesn't work.

OK, just to be clear, you want the green box that says “spoiler”? The first little mask symbol just shows a mask. The one that shows the green box is the one that looks like an eye with a line across it.

 

[Jester57]

What happened to all the Volkswagen microbuses?

Spoiler

I hear they vanished.

 

[Hayden Goseek]

 

[Jester57]

View attachment 3491598

‘Bout right.

 

[Jester57]

Thank you for explaining how they grind up fish.

Spoiler

It was sole stirring.

 

[Hayden Goseek]

Most people don't know that back in 1912, Hellmann's mayonnaise was manufactured in England. In fact, the Titanic was carrying 12,000 jars of the condiment scheduled for delivery in Vera Cruz, Mexico, which was to be the next port of call for the great ship after its stop in New York.

This would have been the largest single shipment of mayonnaise ever delivered to Mexico. But as we know, the great ship did not make it to New York. The ship hit an iceberg and sank, and the cargo was forever lost.

The people of Mexico, who were crazy about mayonnaise, and were eagerly awaiting its delivery, were disconsolate at the loss. Their anguish was so great, that they declared a National Day of Mourning, which they still observe to this day.

The National Day of Mourning occurs each year on May 5th and is known, of course, as Sinko de Mayo.

 

[Hayden Goseek]

Doctor: "I will be delivering the baby."

Dad: "I would prefer the baby with a liver."

 

[Hayden Goseek]

Customer: "I need a battery so I can tell the time."

Salesman: "Is it for a clock?"

Customer: "I don't know. That's why I need the battery.

 

[Hayden Goseek]

It's a five minute walk from my house to the pub.
It's a 30 minute walk from the pub to my house.

The difference is staggering.

 

[Hayden Goseek]

When two socks puppets really care about each other,
It's not just sox, They make glove.