10 Years
Jan 11, 2010
He is driving me crazy.
Since we started building this house he has just been acting mean at times.

Right now he is mad at me because of the electrity he is running in the house. I was told by 2 different people we needed a permit before we started.
So I went on line and got the permit. It cost $200, which was the surprise.

Well our inspector came out today just to see what was here and to visit with us. DH had already gone into town to get the wire and boxes.
The inspector only found 2 things we need to change.

Called DH and told him. Boy did I get chewed out over the permit last night and the inspector this morning.
Found out that our insurance company would not cover us unless there is a permit and inspection.

I have been getting chewed out for all these new rules and laws since yesterday. Not sure I am going to go to bed. Might just sleep with DD tonight because I am so sick of listening to him.
maybe that would be best- fresh outlook and all that

sometimes we all need to get away for a night.
Ya know, if he's gonna chew YOU out for making him follow the rules......
I would probably say "well fine, have at it" and leave for a while, wait till he got good and involved, and call the code inspector myself

It sounds like your relationship has issues that are being exaggerated by stress??
My parents were like this when building their house. Drove all of us up the ever loving wall. Its a major accomplishment to survive building a house together. My husband and I are in the beginning stages of this and I already told him we are going to therapy now rather than later. I figure therapy is cheaper than fines and having to redo stuff to code because he doesn't listen. My mom so should have done that.

Spell it out for him. Its a partnership deal. I cover your bum and you cover mine and hopefully together we get through the landmines all these codes and requirements set in front of us. You chew me out one more time then you better sleep with your eyes open because I have super glue and know how to use it. ( I leave that one to your imagination and how evil you are. I am very evil so...)
He neeeds to know the purpose of the permits and the repercushions of not having one. Quite frankly, I am surprised that you did not need a more encompassing building permit rather than simply the electrical one.

Purpose: safety, to make sure it is structurally sound, not a fire or electrocution hazard

Repercushions: possibility of huge fines and being ordered to tear the structure down to the ground.
I am one to follow the rules.A lot of people get away with no permits,but I woulod be getting each one.I would want to know everythnig was legal and up to current regulations. Just ignore dh and he will come around...hopefully apologising.
you need permits for everything... not just so the township knows what you house is worth (tax wise) but without permits you could be told to take the building sown or worse yet finish the project without permits ... have a complication such as a fire and the insurance company telling you to pound sand! This is not the place to cut costs.

Good for you!
don't know much about permits but i think if you don't have proper permits if you ever want to sell your house, you may not be able to. Maybe have your insurance agent talk with him about having permits and being able to insure his hard work (house).
I apologize for him. Sometimes when we are upset, us guys lash out inappropriately. I'm old enough that I've learned how to say "I'm sorry. Iwas wrong." It doesn't come naturally to us. He's got a lot on his mind and will eventually get his act together.

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