Do you ever secretly wonder if........

[Cindiloohoo]

SaraBeth we have a very good pediatrician (here in the backwoods

) that has covered all the bases. My kid also has several allergies/intolerances that affect her neurologically that actually are triggers for her ADD. She is intolerant to MSG, and has multiple airborne allergies. We have covered all the bases and have even gotten second opinions from Vanderbilt and LeBonheur, so I appreciate the concern, but I honestly do think we have covered everything under the sun and have a correct diagnosis. We have pulled so much blood from that poor kid and had so many scans done it's not even funny!!

 

[hearthnsoul]

Quote:
I wish you and yours all the best. Please don't think I meant to judge you in anyway. I know as a parent you are trying to do the very best by your child.
I never meant to imply that all children medicated, shouldn't be. Just that all children shouldn't be medicated.
I have my own personal expereince and observation and I can only speak for myself, but what I have come to believe is that with all these diagnosis going on around me every day, if they were all correct, we should have a pandemic on our hands and there should be a major crisis being addressed.
My sister was diagnosed with adhd when she was very young and that was over 25 years ago, all the health problems she has today are from the medication she was on and they are alot of health issues. The truth be known, I doubt she ever should have been on anything to begin with. I also don't believe there is a child out there that a doctor couldn't be easily led into medicating and diagnosing with adhd. I see the education departments leading alot of parents down the road to there being something wrong with their children, when the problem lays with their education plans and standards.
I think the ridicuous standards our school have now to pass the "no child left behind" and mcas testing combined with the restrictive teaching i.e where has recess, phys ed and music gone??? This has lead to a very unnatural learning environment for our children. Our country is trying to compete with Japans teaching standards, and yet Japan has the highest suicde rate,..my thoughts,..just because a child can learn something younger, doesn't necessarily mean it is developmentally appropriate for them.
I also see all the unnatural ingredients, hormones and genetically altered foods have a major impact on our developing children. There are alot of concerns I have.
I once asked my mother, as she is a surgical nurse, How many of the patients she had coming in for surgery daily are on some sort of medication for adhd, bipolar, depression and similar issues? She said honey the better question would be how many aren't, and that's few and far between. Most of them have a list as long as my arm. That just disturbs me and makes me think that this country in general is overmedicated.
One of my own sons, they went this route with him, he had failing grades and they said there was an issue. We went to the pedi and the test questons, I looked through them, well I said to the pedi, what are you diagnosing here childhood? He laughed and then proceeded to tell me that he and his wife had adhd and he suspected most of their friends did,..what bull, I told him maybe we are living in an unnaturally fast paced world that is too diffucult for the normal human brain and nervous system to function in???,..kinda sobered him up a bit. He actualy asked me if I wanted to go the medication route with my son, which I told him absolutely not. I researched schools and finally got him into a another high school, teaching a more realistic cirriculum and the f report cards went to one anyone would be proud of, in one semester! Of course they came to my next son upon entering kindergarten and I blatantly told them, been there done that, if you want to give him extra help at school great, give him an iep plan, it will just make the learning experience more realistic,..but let's not bother going the diagnosing anything mode because the issue is with the education plan, not the child.
Funny with my first son they argued it out with me alot, now with years inbetween alot of the educators are getting onto the same placecard with me.

 

[SarahBeth9394]

Quote:
It really is all about finding the right doctors. Glad to hear you've got a good one. Too many don't. I had a friend in high school that was one of the smartest, and nicest people you could meet. I didn't know until well after that she had food allergies that affected her in the same way. She learned what to avoid and how to deal with it and did accordingly and has done great. I wouldn't have even known had her father (who ended up being one of my college instructors) not told the class.

Oh and being in the backwoods isn't all that bad. I left the big city for a small town of 4000 and this is the best school system for kids with developmental disabilities that we've been a part of.

 

[Cindiloohoo]

OY! Yeah I know what you mean. This is part of the reason for homeschool. After a year of being MSG (neurological excitotoxin) free, she still had enough quirks to warrant meds....scares the crap outta me to give them to her on a regular basis!! I demanded lowest dose, and then only give half, because that curbs her quirks enough to get through school without a gallon of tears. The rest of the time, we do focus training...hehe...she doesn't know that's what it is, but "we" (parents) do. She has a list of chores to keep her busy and give her reason to focus. I bought most of the animals we have for her benefit as well as our own. It is working out great!! It really is a difficult balance. Like I said, I do still worry if we are doing the right thing sometimes, but then she has one of her really off days...and I kinda know. She will have a good childhood if it kills me

I stress more than anybody about it!! She laughs at me...little twerp

 

[crzychickenlady]

I don't really focus on all of the "negative" issues, I really do try to focus on the good things. It just seems that it gets harder and harder as she gets older. I'm not all that concerned with the diagnosis of ADHD, I think all children can fit into the category of having ADHD if that were the case.
What worries me are specific things that she does and certain issues that she has. IF I take her back to the doctor I'm going to try and address those issues individually instead of letting them lump it all into one category (ADHD) and then try to treat accordingly.

Every child gets a little rambunctious from time to time and gets bored and entertains themselves. I know this is normal behavior for ANY child.....that is not my concern....she can be annoying from time to time, but that is OK by me.

The issues I am mainly concerned about are her having a VERY hard time being still at all. She bounces off the walls...sometimes literally...it seems that her brain is moving even faster than her body (if you can imagine that) and she just cant seem to calm down and relax. There are many nights that she will stay up into the wee hours, sometimes 1am, even tho she is in her room and supposed to be sleeping. This is a BIG concern for me, the body and the brain HAS to have some down time!

Her inability to focus on any thing long enough to actually finish it. She can manage a few minutes on one subject, seems to do great at it, then it's like someone flips a switch and she has to start over from the beginning...which is frustrating for her and me at the same time. Like I said before, we work on homework, I explain to her how to do math problems (for example) she goes thru about 3 or 4 problems just fine, then that switch is tripped and she has lost all the info. So, we have to start all over again and I become frustrated and she gets upset and cries.

Another issue she has is hyper-sensitivity, she will cry at any given moment over the simplest of things. She just loses it....

I know that doctors can be more of a problem than a solution at times and am afraid to take her back in, BUT, I need help with her and I don't really know what to do. I think she needs some help with her hyperactivity and ability to focus, but is medication the answer here??
I have been told to establish an air tight routine for her and the family as a whole, but this is hard to do if she cannot focus and retain anything.

Being a mother and making the right decisions is just so hard!

 

[Cindiloohoo]

If you want to try what we do. She gets a list of chores. The simplest easiest ones you can think of like, changing the filter in the central unit, or feeding the dogs/chickens/whatever, picking up dirty laundry to put in the laundry room etc. Make a chart, have her do each and mark them off the list every day. Give her enough it will last about half an hour to an hour each day. This gets rid of some of the excess energy and allows her to get into a routine which will aid her focus with practice focusing every day. Reward her focus so that she enjoys it! We give ours a special dinner night where she picks what she wants, or she helps make desert she wants etc. That is where we started when she was your daughters age, and have progressed to the point she can take almost as good of care of the chickens goats and turkeys as I can, even when not on the meds during the summer. I think we will be taking her off meds next school year and see if it is time yet. This year has been horrendous, but she has so much going on physically this year, if ya know what I mean...so maybe next year.

I agree so much about not focusing on the negative issues!! All kids do fit ADHD symptoms at any given time, but not usually every day consistently, I think that is the major misconception. My kid has good days occasionally when she isn't on meds. I worried most about my dd because she got so dangerous I was afraid she'd blow herself up or burn the house down!! And AMEN to that last statement!! It sucks some days!!!

 

[CityGirlintheCountry]

Okay, again, take my advice with a grain of salt, because I don't have kids. I do coach a swim team though and have a number of ADHD kids on the team. Their parents highly recommend it.
The benefits-
- regular swim practice is very tiring. Most kids are worn out by the end of practice. It give my ADHD kids a safe way to get rid of excess energy.
- There are few distractions in the water. It is an easy way to focus as there is just water and you. Sound and sights are muffled so your brain can focus in on just the physical movement.
- Learning to swim and swim competitively is a huge confidence booster. For a lot of these kids they have been told to sit still and stop moving and be quiet. Once we start swimming I never say any of those things to the kids. They can't talk when they are in the water and I want them to move

I don't know if there are swim programs near you, but it might be worth checking out. Most medium to large cities have year round swimming programs at both private and public facilities. Could be useful.

 

[Cindiloohoo]

That's a great idea! I never thought of swimming like that, but we have a pool and my kid is half fish...maybe that is why we don't have much problem in the summer, besides not having school of course

Good idea though. Oh and even though you don't have kids, doesn't disqualify you from this conversation

valuable input is appreciated greatly!!! I'm always looking for ways to help my kid get better. THANKS!!!

 

[Damummis]

And I thought my 15 year old was the only one with a few fries short of a happy meal, few grapes short of fruit salad or if someone just blew out her pilot light.

Yay!! I'm NOT alone.

Cause sometimes I'd like to

 

[CityGirlintheCountry]

You are very welcome. Swimming is a great sport because it is both a team sport and an individual sport. Children can excel at their own pace. Plus, it does take a LOT of energy.