Fabulous, 40, conforming non conformist ramblings on being yourself

Kansaseq

Prairie Wolf Farm Asylum
10 Years
Feb 12, 2009
3,723
41
226
NE Kansas
So I just turned 40 last Friday. WOW. 40. Me. Hard to believe. I decided to throw myself a party, well,a bonfire, to be exact. I invited 20 of my closest friends and family, neighbors, told them to BYOB, lawnchair, a side, and come on down. Most of the city folk can't believe how FAR it is, and they wonder how I do the commute every day. All I can say is that yes, it's far, but yes, it's worth it.
I know times have changed radically and that it's not that shocking to be my age and single, never been married, no kids, etc. But some of the people I work with think it's 'scary' living so far away, in the middle of nowhere, with no husband. They wonder how I manage with so many dogs. That's nothing new. To me, I"m just the tomboy who never really grew up, who is finally living out my dream for real. I have a little bit of land out in the country, my doggies, chickens, and hopefully, a horse or two again.

Like I said, me living the life I was meant to live is nothing new or earth shattering to me or my family. But the other day, my dear friend and neighbor came over with her 19yr old daughter. I was showing them the shed they had given me this spring, now converted into my 'new' chicken coop, complete with the babies I hatched out. Her daughter I guess thought my place was pretty cool/rustic and wants to find something like it for herself. She also told me that her daughter also thought it was very cool that I was doing this on my own. That was what got me. I never thought of myself as a role model. HOLY COW. Me? It was a weird feeling. Most of the time I still feel about 16. I guess this is when the whole midlife crisis thing is supposed to happen? Will I ever find my soulmate, etc, etc. Well, I guess I just don't have time for that right now. I really want to start fencing the front pasture this weekend, maybe work on expanding the main chicken run, clean the house, feed the dogs, maybe go on a date(what's that??).
I guess my whole point, is that, ladies, it's OK to be our age and be single. Yea, men can be really, really nice to have in our lives. I still haven't ruled out the idea that there's someone out there for me. But I've got too much to do to sit around worrying about it. Believe me, I am pretty average. And if little old wimpy me can do it, so can you.
 
I agree and thats what I tell my kids you dont need anyone else but yourself to make your life complete....
And happy late birthday....
 
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I wish you could give seminars to young women everywhere, who have it imprinted on/in them they have to have a significant other to survive. I applaud you for your lifestyle . . .keep it up!! And, think about writing a book . . .you have a good thought going here and it needs to be told.
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We'll see how my carpal tunnel feels about it. Sometimes my will is greater than my body's ability (that whole gettin' old thing!)
 
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Sure. Wait. Are you a guy?
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Oh, I think I was saying something about independence. What was it.....
 
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You go girl! I admit I don't get the whole big deal about turning 40. I'm gonna be exactly the same person the morning after as I was the morning before--and I'm pretty happy with that person. I wouldn't mind having back the body I had at 20 but I wouldn't be 20 again for anything!

I blew my knee out in judo three weeks ago--gonna have to have surgery this summer to put it all together again. (Tore the MCL and meniscus, ruptured the ACL). Most of our friends and my dad want to know why on earth I'm going to keep doing judo. They just don't get it. Besides, I'm a stay-at-home homeschooling mom with two kids--I gotta do SOMETHING off the wall just for me. Don't think I'll be getting that black belt for my 40th though!
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Happy Birthday!

And yes you are indeed a role model for all girls/women. I share a similar view and approach life with the same attitude. The only differences would be I have the hubby and the kids but no farm! I have always believed that women should always be able to attack any problem and fix it themselves (which gets a lot of weird looks when I go and grab my power tools, lift heavy objects, etc....
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) I once had my great aunt tell me that my uterus was going to fall out if I picked up a heavy box!
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I told her that if that was all it took I would have started picking up heavy objects much earlier in life!

I hope you are able to find a life partner that is as understanding as mine... who manages to just smile and shrug when you 'do your own thing'. One that knows better than to tell you 'No you can't do that....'

And I don't think you are going through a mid-life crisis, I feel like I am 16 all the time too! And I just had MY birthday last Saturday and turned 35!
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Rock on lady!
 

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