For the Farm Boy...

[sourland]

Someday on a face to face, we'll share stories like: the hatchet and the cellar door, figure skates flying out of the daughter's closet, box of candy wrappers (eaten by elves) found under son's bed, the day son said "Get this, I don't want to work.", and then there was the day she truly straightened out my act. Not too bad over a period of 47 years.

 

[mississippifarmboy]

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You do know we could get together, tell stories on ourselves and get both rich and famous doing it don't ya?
Just look at the blue collar comedy tour.

Just sayin'

 

[sourland]

MFB, we've already had the stand-up comedian talk. Have I told you that I think you should write a book? I can see it developing a true cult following-- in only the best of ways, but I will refuse the Kool-aid. (Unless Redhen brings it. I trust her.)

 

[mississippifarmboy]

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I can't even write a "remember to buy X at the store" note, much less a book. I tried writing a novel, got it up over 1,100 pages and even I still didn't know what the darn thing was about. Finally just gave up.

Wouldn't mind having a cult following, but I'm pretty sure my wife would nip that one in the bud.

It do have possibilities though

And today is "international be sweet to Redhen day". She's having a rough week.

 

[EweSheep]

Better get some moonshine keg if the Kool Aid is bad.

 

[EmtheFishLady]

My husband doesn't let me stew. If I get mad, I get quiet for, maybe an hour...He apologizes without even knowing what he's done. The longer I stay stewing, the madder I get. I don't think he'd risk three days.

 

[Wisher1000]

I got one...

City slicker is driving down a country road, soaking in the country experience when he notices a farmer in a pasture. The farmer is standing over a cow, which is laying on it's side, just off the road. As he gets closer, the farmer waves him over, so he stops. As he is climbing over the rail fence, the farmer says, "Mornin' Mister! I'm shore gald you happened by. Would you mind giving me a hand with this cow?" Slick looks closer, and notices that there are two calf sized back legs sticking out of the back end of the cow. "Whoa, sure I'll help, what can I do?" he said. " Just grab hold of one of the legs, put your boot on the cows back side and PULL!" Together, the city slicker and the farmer pull and pull and manage to safely deliver the healthy calf. Standing in exhaused silence, they catch their breath and watch the calf take it's first shaky steps. Finally the farmer offers the slicker his hand and says, "I shore appreciate your help. I don't think I could have done that alone! If I can ever do anything for you, you just let me know, hear?!" Slick looks back at the calf and says, "Just answer one question. How fast was that little cow going when it hit that big cow?"

 

[mississippifarmboy]

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I do that too! I bet I've apoligized at least a zillion times for ??? Beats, me! But if she's mad, I musta done something and I know I gotta apoligize and get back on her good side. I just hate it when I have to agree to never do it again, when I don't even know what I did.

But if you admit you don't know what you did, then you are in twice as much trouble. I just don't get it.

I'm an auctioneer and farmer, not a darn mind reader!

 

[mississippifarmboy]

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And not a little cat either, more like a full grown mountain lion with a sore tooth. Ya'll skeer us fellers!

 

[ChickensAreSweet]

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You poor thing... reckon you could get some kinda pills that might help?

Yeah, don't let him fool ya, He probably lives in Manhatten, wears Gucci suits, and watches Broadway shows every night.

Imp

Oops I just noticed how long this thread is...heehee.