Foster Parenting

[redhen]

How old is the child Boyd?

 

[Boyd]

I know, but sometimes doing the right thing for somebody else feels bad/dirty. I did lay all this out over a month ago, but they elected not to listen... well today was a wake up call. I just have a hard time watching them cry when the agency and dhs tells them how badly they've screwed up. So they heard it from 3 sources, not the biased dad

 

[Sillystunt]

that really sucks boyd! But some people need to touch the fire to make sure it's hot. Sounds like you got some of them at your house. Look it is what it is. As harsh as it is, they knew it would come down to this. What ever this is. Now they have to deal with it, it's part of growing up! Sucks, really sucks

 

[redhen]

Yup, what Silly said. Sometimes that how people have to learn..the hard way. They have to realize for every thing they do in life there ARE consequences for it. It sucks..but maybe they will learn from it somehow.

 

[Sillystunt]

trust me i was knocked up at 17, i learned the hard way

 

[Sillystunt]

dear god, send help! i am not gonna make it, this 20month old is driving me nuts

I have never encountered such an unpleasant child. He has not stopped crying for mom, won't ley anyone hold him, never smiles and only wants bread and water.

i feel horrible, i don't know what to do

He is not hurting, jut sooo un happy. i feel helpless!! I was up every 20 mins last night helping him with nightmares. And he's mean and hits you.

I don't fault him just am lost on how to help him. tried hugs and kisses, oh no! he don't like that.

on another note, i got the cutest almost non verbal 4 year old.....

 

[saddina]

Sounds like the 20 month old just was taken into the system? At almost 2 that's going to be very tramautic for him, and you're going to have to stand back and let him lead. If he's refusing physical affection, try food and kind words. Hmmm perhaps some melon or a fruit to get him to eat? He'll need some close monotoring (yeah I know you know that, just thinking out loud). Has he been assigned play theraphy or similar?

 

[Boyd]

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Sorry to hear that. Being that young, it should pass quick me thinks.

 

[redhen]

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Ouch! I give you guys that do the young ones SO much credit!! I dont think i'd be strong enough to do it..i really dont. Poor baby!

 

[Crusty McPottydoodle]

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It's tough when they are that young. Communication is so hard. I read that children with no conrol in their lives can be hard to feed as food is often the one thing they can control.

My daughter is very difficult to feed (has been since her dad and I split up). If I offer her something to try, she will immediately tell me she doesn't like it. If I am eating something in front of her and don't offer it to her, she will ask me what I am eating. I tell her. More often than not, she will ask to try it. I am usually reluctant (sincerely so, because it is almost always something I really like and don't want to share), but say yes. First she will smell it. If she gets past the smell test, she will give it a little taste. Even if she thinks she doesn't like it, she will often give it a second taste before making a decision. I took her to Morocco a couple of years ago - the child literally only consumed bread and water. She did give some dishes a try. We joke about how she only eats white food - bread (although she eats brown and multigrain too), pasta, chicken, potatoes - you get the picture)

My point with this is perhaps give the little one the bread and water he wants, but at the same time, you eat something really yummy. It may take a bit, but he may want to try what you are eating - especially if it is something he can smell.

Good luck and be strong. You are doing a wonderful thing.

Cheryl