Granny....this is going to come from a place of love but...I gotta tough love you for a second.
I don't shive a git what "people do" around you. Robert wants a dog, and Robert wants a bigger dog...he has to do BETTER than "throw it outside and hope for the best" in your household. Tom wouldn't fare too well against an excitable crazed big puppers, and that pup could do damage to you as well.
There will be a settling in period...no matter what. BUT...the end goal MUST BE to have a well mannered, trained dog in your household.
There may be nothing like that around here, *BUT* there's lots of online resources (youtube etc) on training and socializing. There are trips you can do that are dog friendly (most home depots, tractor supply/pet stores are pet friendly, if in doubt, call or contact in advance to be sure).