How-To Chickens Contest!!! (Writing instructions of how to do your chickens) ENDS JULY 20TH 2023

[-BUCK-]

You must, and I repeat, MUST let the chickens out at 7: 42 SHARP. Not a minute early, not a minute late. Depart from the house at 7:39, that way, you will reach the barn by 7:42 sharp. If you come too early, they will squawk at you, and you will have to go back inside and wait 17 minutes precisely for them to get extra sleep. Too late, and they'll peck you half to death. When you open the coop door, many birds will come running out, and Clover will stand by your feet. PICK HIM UP IMMEDIATELY. I REPEAT: IMMEDIATELY! If you don't pick him up IMMEDIATELY, he will not leave you alone for the rest of the day. He will constantly chirp and peck at you if you pick him up a minute late. So pick him up, and gently stroke his back and scratch under his wattles, or he will fall into chronic depression.. and don't let any other chickens see you doing this, or they, too will fall into chronic depression. Pet him for exactly 1 minute and 45 seconds. Set him down too late, and he will get impatient, too early, and he will never recover from the heartbreak. Most of the other ones will mind their own business, so fill up the water, and watch out for the raining poop! Some hens like to wait a while for you to leave, and they decide to poop at the precise moment so that you walk face first into an airborne glob of poop.. so, yeah, watch out for that...
Drumstick is probably broody, and she needs to be taken out at 7: 54 SHARP. Don't ask me why, this is just how she likes it. So take her out and check for eggs.
Oh, and I forgot to mention...........
BEWARE THE 'HENNY PENNY '
Henny Penny will attack you. There's no avoiding this. She will attack when you lest expect.
Hold on... I think I hear a.....
No, is that... AAAAAAAAAAAAH SAVE MEEEEEEEEEEEE........ THE HENNY PENNY STRIKES AGAIN!!! AAAAAAAAHHHH!!!!! SOMEBODY CALL THE COPS OR SOME THING!!!! AAAAAAAAAAAAAHHH!!!!

I am not responsible for any injury, damage or fatality than may and will occur due to the Henny Penny.

By signing this contract, you agree to all the above, and will receive a $527 fine if not completed... That is, if you make it out alive....

Signed (x)____________________________________

 

[Blue Raptor]

You must, and I repeat, MUST let the chickens out at 7: 42 SHARP. Not a minute early, not a minute late. Depart from the house at 7:39, that way, you will reach the barn by 7:42 sharp. If you come too early, they will squawk at you, and you will have to go back inside and wait 17 minutes precisely for them to get extra sleep. Too late, and they'll peck you half to death. When you open the coop door, many birds will come running out, and Clover will stand by your feet. PICK HIM UP IMMEDIATELY. I REPEAT: IMMEDIATELY! If you don't pick him up IMMEDIATELY, he will not leave you alone for the rest of the day. He will constantly chirp and peck at you if you pick him up a minute late. So pick him up, and gently stroke his back and scratch under his wattles, or he will fall into chronic depression.. and don't let any other chickens see you doing this, or they, too will fall into chronic depression. Pet him for exactly 1 minute and 45 seconds. Set him down too late, and he will get impatient, too early, and he will never recover from the heartbreak. Most of the other ones will mind their own business, so fill up the water, and watch out for the raining poop! Some hens like to wait a while for you to leave, and they decide to poop at the precise moment so that you walk face first into an airborne glob of poop.. so, yeah, watch out for that...
Drumstick is probably broody, and she needs to be taken out at 7: 54 SHARP. Don't ask me why, this is just how she likes it. So take her out and check for eggs.
Oh, and I forgot to mention...........
BEWARE THE 'HENNY PENNY '
Henny Penny will attack you. There's no avoiding this. She will attack when you lest expect.
Hold on... I think I hear a.....
No, is that... AAAAAAAAAAAAH SAVE MEEEEEEEEEEEE........ THE HENNY PENNY STRIKES AGAIN!!! AAAAAAAAHHHH!!!!! SOMEBODY CALL THE COPS OR SOME THING!!!! AAAAAAAAAAAAAHHH!!!!

I am not responsible for any injury, damage or fatality than may and will occur due to the Henny Penny.

By signing this contract, you agree to all the above, and will receive a $527 fine if not completed... That is, if you make it out alive....

Signed (x)____________________________________

Henny Penny Sounds like a wonderful little lady.

 

[-BUCK-]

Henny Penny Sounds like a wonderful little lady.

Oh, you haven't even heard it all.....

Wait till you hear the egg incident of '42.....

 

[Blue Raptor]

Oh, you haven't even heard it all.....
View attachment 3552740
Wait till you hear the egg incident of '42.....

*runs in fear*

 

[Ilovemychicks08]

First start by making sure the Chickens are outside by 8 a.m sometimes the door doesnt open. (DONT LET THE DUCKS OUT YET!) They should have enough food to last 7 days but make sure to check if they ate it all or if they can get the food because of the metal grate. If there is not enough food get it out of the door next to our additionz make sure it is the green bag with the chicken on it do not give them the other food! Next make sure they have enough water. DONT use the plastic waterer it will just leak water out. Fill up the black tub and the large pipe i have for water(Although this should already be filled up). Be sure to collect the eggs before they are ate or one goes broody(which i wouldnt mind a broody when i come home). SO IF ONE IS IN THE NESTING BOX FOR MORE THAN 1 DAY DONT TAKE HER EGGS AWAY!
You can give them one scoop of treats a week no more than ONE though.
Now to know a little about each chicken:
If you dont pay attention to each ond and say "Good Morning" you will be pecked.
First Cinnamon thinks she is the boss, she will attack any chicke. If she isnt picked up right after the others.
Then Honey she needs to be picked up daily and placed ontop of the nesting box where she will try and peck your hair but she is harmless.
Next is Luna she loves to be stroked but doesn't mind a day or two being missed.
Next Chirpy hates to be picked up dont try but she does love treats.
Then last is Spirit she has her own personality somedays she lets me pet her otherdays she doesnt so just go by her mood.
Now ive never dealt with mites but make sure to keep a eye out for illnesses.

Next is the ducks, they wont let anyone but me pick them up! SO DONT TRY UNLESS YOU WANT TO BE BITTEN, AND TRUST ME IT HURTS! Just take the hose fill up both black tubs with water. Then the feed is in a tub inside the coop, make sure there is plenty of feed meaning full! Make sure to feed the duck feed inside the door! No treats yet, but do immediately text or call me if you find a egg(I NEED TO KNOW)! If the pool has algea dump it out and i will tell you if you need to fill it up. Dont just dump it out as its dirty, i just filled it up before we left.


NOW REMEMBER TO SHUT THE GATES! AND DONT LET THE DUCKS IN WITH THE CHICKENS!

By signing this you agree to the terms above and i will come home to a happy and healthy flock! And that im not reliable for any injuries that occur!
(x)____________________________________

 

[Shabby Chic-Hens]

You must, and I repeat, MUST let the chickens out at 7: 42 SHARP. Not a minute early, not a minute late. Depart from the house at 7:39, that way, you will reach the barn by 7:42 sharp. If you come too early, they will squawk at you, and you will have to go back inside and wait 17 minutes precisely for them to get extra sleep. Too late, and they'll peck you half to death. When you open the coop door, many birds will come running out, and Clover will stand by your feet. PICK HIM UP IMMEDIATELY. I REPEAT: IMMEDIATELY! If you don't pick him up IMMEDIATELY, he will not leave you alone for the rest of the day. He will constantly chirp and peck at you if you pick him up a minute late. So pick him up, and gently stroke his back and scratch under his wattles, or he will fall into chronic depression.. and don't let any other chickens see you doing this, or they, too will fall into chronic depression. Pet him for exactly 1 minute and 45 seconds. Set him down too late, and he will get impatient, too early, and he will never recover from the heartbreak. Most of the other ones will mind their own business, so fill up the water, and watch out for the raining poop! Some hens like to wait a while for you to leave, and they decide to poop at the precise moment so that you walk face first into an airborne glob of poop.. so, yeah, watch out for that...
Drumstick is probably broody, and she needs to be taken out at 7: 54 SHARP. Don't ask me why, this is just how she likes it. So take her out and check for eggs.
Oh, and I forgot to mention...........
BEWARE THE 'HENNY PENNY '
Henny Penny will attack you. There's no avoiding this. She will attack when you lest expect.
Hold on... I think I hear a.....
No, is that... AAAAAAAAAAAAH SAVE MEEEEEEEEEEEE........ THE HENNY PENNY STRIKES AGAIN!!! AAAAAAAAHHHH!!!!! SOMEBODY CALL THE COPS OR SOME THING!!!! AAAAAAAAAAAAAHHH!!!!

I am not responsible for any injury, damage or fatality than may and will occur due to the Henny Penny.

By signing this contract, you agree to all the above, and will receive a $527 fine if not completed... That is, if you make it out alive....

Signed (x)____________________________________

Please don’t tell me that you do this.

 

[-BUCK-]

Please don’t tell me that you do this.

This ain't instructions for me, this is for whoever takes care of them when I go out of town for Independence Day lol
Then I can finally have a break from them lol

 

[Shabby Chic-Hens]

This ain't instructions for me, this is for whoever takes care of them when I go out of town for Independence Day lol
Then I can finally have a break from them lol

But those time things!
I let my birds out when I let them out. They get fed/watered when they get fed/watered. That is each day, but at no specific time. If they are lucky enough to get caught, they will get pets.

 

[-BUCK-]

But those time things!
I let my birds out when I let them out. They get fed/watered when they get fed/watered. That is each day, but at no specific time. If they are lucky enough to get caught, they will get pets.

That's kind how I am too, I just made some silly instrux for the contest lol....
But I ain't jokin about Henny Penny..........

 

[Shabby Chic-Hens]

That's kind how I am too, I just made some silly instrux for the contest lol....
But I ain't jokin about Henny Penny..........

Aha. I shall have to do the same then!