I don't want my dog anymore . . .

[KlaHaYa Gardens]

Okay, he's not my dog, he's my daughter's dog. A standard poodle. Go ahead, tell me how awful I am.

But first consider my list of complaints:

1) He's a dog. I'm allergic to him. Severely.

2) He eats my chocolate. I have to hide it on the very top shelf in the back, where I struggle to reach it, or he will get it after first opening the pantry door.

3) He gets in my bed. He lays on it. He messes it up. Sometimes he doesn't as he merely climbs in between the sheets. I often have to re-wash my bedding before I can go to bed. (No lectures about dog/owner bed management, please. It's complicated.) Also, remember #1: I'm allergic to the dog, so having him in my bed is more than a dirty problem.

4) He dug a HOLE in my expensive mattress. And a few holes in my hand sewn quilts.

5) He insists on sleeping with a pillow. My pillow. Any of my pillows. My feather pillows. He steals them from me at night and then lays his ugly, furry, face on them. Then I have more washing to do. Not to mention a poor night's sleep wheezing, laying flat with no pillow, and a cranky neck and attitude in the morning.

6) Medication. It's hard to keep up with my daughter and the medications she wants to try on the dog to get him to sleep. (No, she doesn't poison him, but she did mention Benadryl once.)

7) Tonight, he smells especially bad. (No, it's not diarrhea from the chocolate.) He must have rolled in the neighbor's llama poop, just before he climbed in my bed and laid his ugly, furry face on my feather pillows. My daughter suggested I should sleep in the dog house with a sleeping bag and a duck.


I'm offering this dog at a starting bid of $0.99.

Going, going, dog gone!

 

[redhen]

Arent poodles usually non-allergenic? Maybe not though... ?

 

[Highlander]

I'm wondering why you got a dog when you are "severly" allergic in the first place? But it sounds like a lack of basic training to me which is a shame as standard poodles are generally wonderful dogs.

 

[KlaHaYa Gardens]

Quote:
They aren't as bad as most dogs, but I am still allergic to him. I have to take quite a bit of medication to survive and have 5 air purifiers going, nor carpet, etc., etc.

(He is a nice dog, but that's beside the point. He rolled in llama poop and then into my bed!

)

 

[EmtheFishLady]

If you were closer, I'd take him in a heartbeat. I am absolutely IN LOVE with standards. They are AMAZING dogs. They are incredibly smart, and need to know who is the boss....problem is, my Standard knows he's the boss!

If you're willing to drive him to NC, I'd love another snuggle buddy.

 

[RabbitMage]

...have you thought about training him, at least? Won't fix the allergies, but that's what the Benadryl is for.

 

[KlaHaYa Gardens]

Quote:
*Departs complaint mode momentarily to be serious*

Standard Poodles are fabulous, which is why we have one. (He is a good dog, too. But that is not to be admitted again in this thread. My intention is to slander my dog severely.)

We got our first Standard to be a service dog for my eldest son. A standard poodle due to the intelligence, trainability, and the best regarding mitigating allergic reactions. We picked our trainer and then picked our dog. He became a service dog to my eldest as intended, then he decided to "serve" my youngest (who has since passed). That dog earned so much respect and loyalty from us all, me included.

In his fifth year, my eldest visited his friend and a neighbor and tied the dog in their yard. Unbeknown to me, there was another neighbor who had been pestering my son for three years wanting his dog. I had no idea. The dog was stolen. We believe by this neighbor who was conveniently moving. This was a very small a private community. Not a lot of people. Nevertheless, we had a rule that the dog was NEVER to be tied out and left, but my son did and the dog was gone.

We, as a family, grieved this dog for 5 years before getting another poodle. Honestly, I didn't want to. I did not want to invest the time training, the money, and I did not want to take allergy medication. A close family friend really did not understand this, but only managed to hear my daughter's repeated requests and found this poodle. Yes, I said okay as I am at home full time.

My daughter is fabulous with the dog and has trained him to do many things (except to stay out of my bed -- which is in the living room). We bought something today that is effectively like a mouse trap noise-wise, to place under the blanket to scare the dog off the bed.

But that was before he rolled in llama poop and then into my bed.



I'm going to resume whining about my dog now. No more poodle respect will be shown in this thread. Only poodle-bashing. MY poodle bashing.

Anyone know of good recipes that call for poodle meat?

 

[KlaHaYa Gardens]

Quote:
I'm going to train him to light the grill and then lay down on it.

 

[EmtheFishLady]

Can I complain too? My idiot poodle has eaten poison TWICE. Not once, no, once wasn't enough. He had to try it TWICE.

 

[KlaHaYa Gardens]

Here is his ugly mug so you all can join me in bashing him and slandering what could have been a good name. I think he would look well on an "OUTLAW" poster.