I refuse to feel guilty!!!!!!!!!!! A rant, but also a problem

[gritsar]

I was going to put this in random ramblings, but it really is a family problem.
DSD #2 moved out on her b/f about six months ago. Now she's finding life on your own for a young, single woman is not all it's cracked up to be. She's coming home or rather to her mom's house. We are going this weekend to help her move (again!).
The thing is, she wants us to keep her animals, 2 dogs/3cats, at least her dogs "till she gets on her feet". When my DH told me this I said no. #1. At the rate she's going it may take her awhile to get on her feet. #2. I'm still grieving for my dog and just getting to know my new kitty. #3. One of her dogs is a hound mix and one is a pitbull. Sorry to all those hound and/or pit lovers out there, but I don't trust either around my chickens. #4. I'm the one that would be their primary caregiver and I think I should have a say in this.
My DH agreed with me and told her she wouldn't be able to keep them up here.
So, this morning I sent a text to DSD#1 to tell her about my kitty. Just now I sent her another text to tell her that her dad (my DH) has decided to accept a friend's kind offer of a german shepherd puppy and that he sounds really happy for the first time since we got the cancer diagnosis on our deceased dog.
She sent me a text back and said what about my sister's dogs???
What about them? They are not our responsibility! To my way of thinking, as much as she loves her critters she needs to see about re-homing them. I had to do it once when I was in a tight fix. It broke my heart, but had to be done and it was best for the animals.
I was just starting to smile again since losing Charlie and now I feel all bummed out again.

 

[speckledhen]

Kat, you did the right thing. At this point, you need to take care of yourself and stand firm. I see a tragedy getting ready to happen if you take in those other dogs. I would absolutely not do it.

 

[Dar]

I agree with you 100%
she was a big girl and moved out on her own and now she feels it necessary to move back in with a parent, kudos to her for having a head on her shoulders BUT the responsibility of animals does not stop cause you are moving home.

Why cant she take them to moms house?
and you are not a pet dumping ground.

you have your kitty and now you have your puppy so you can train him anyway you want. why should you have to retrain her dogs to suit your lifestyle? the answer is you should not.

she has to be the person to either find a friend or re-home them or bring them to a shelter

 

[tiffanyh]

Your right, their not your responsibility, but I am sure your DSD will not be able to see it this way. But maybe you should just let her know directly. THat way it doesnt turn into a problem.

 

[Mahonri]

What Cyn, said, Just say no. Don't do it.

It's great to be supportive, but that goes a bit too far.

 

[debilorrah]

Kat that is YOUR home and YOU get to decide what comes in. If you don;t want those dogs, don;t do it period. Those breeds are NOT good around chickens at all, and if I were you I would stand your ground. Step families are a ton of fun aren't they?

 

[gritsar]

Quote:
Actually I love these girls like they were my own. I mean that! But if it were my own DD asking the answer would still be no.

 

[SophieLain127]

Tell her straight up that you don't trust the breed of dogs she has. Tell her that it is not your job to clean up her messes. Put your foot down. There is a big difference between you picking up the burden of something you want to and and something that is dumped on you.

Technically you don't have to give her any explination what so ever.

 

[dipence71]

I agree 100% you did the right thing and it is hard. Don't let yourself feel guilty when it creeps up on you stop it!!!!

 

[debilorrah]

Quote:
Actually I love these girls like they were my own. I mean that! But if it were my own DD asking the answer would still be no.

I love my 4 step kids the same way. It just that they weren't there before you met him and they all come with their own set of problems. I would tell my own kid NO too. I have one child, Ken has 4. EEEKKK!!!!