If you have long-term houseguests....

[mamawolf544]

Quote:
It is funny you said that, that is when I break out the M&M and Ozzy on the IPOD station.

 

[BWKatz]

Exactly why when we visit we always rent a room. We can sleep in , go back & take a nap when we tire of their company, and not worry about offending anyone by taking it easy on our vacation. That said our family doesn't impose on us either. When they visit, they don't neglect animals, they clean up after themselves and offer to help clean dishes (& to pay for food if for long stays) I am truly blessed.

 

[Sonoran Silkies]

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If there is a will, I believe that legally it MUST go to probate. Sounds like a long story there.

 

[Mattemma]

I have extra kids during the summer months,and I expect them to clean up their rooms,toys,and put dishes away.Lucky for them I still do all the cooking and cleaning.Dh always jokes and says,"Yes boss!" when I ask for something to be done.It was annoying at first,but you know what- I am the boss of this household. I wouldn't be concerned about what you ask others to do.If they don't like it then moving out IS an option.



My mom has a will but I asked her to add me to the deed on her home (suvivorship deed) so that I would avoid probabte court after her death.No sense in getting a lawyer and paying court/lawyer fees.Now I just take the deed and death paper when the time comes,and file to put my name on fully then add someone for when I die. Just gotta make sure you add someone who won't hasten your departure,lol!

 

[Miltonchix]

I think some are afraid to "offend" the offending party. IF they are offended that easily why would you want them there at all? It is your house, your rules, your choice on how long they stay. Freeloaders beware. Its hot out there, and tents tend to leak.

 

[gritsar]

Well this is my stepdaughter and step GS we are talking about, so I can't exactly put them out on the streets. I am genuinely fond of the girl and she's going through a very painful time in her life right now, so any solution has to involve her continuing to stay with us.
We're working on a solution that will allow her to stay here without me ending up needing a rubber room.
DH has told her that she will need to help me out and she's trying. For my part, I am learning to not be such a control freak and accept the fact that things aren't always going to be done my way. For example, she folded towels and I did not go back and re-fold them, even though they weren't folded the way I prefer.
She is going to help us remove some of the stuff from the office and put it into storage, so there's room in here for a double bed. Creating this "bedroom" for her and the GS will help me alot, as it drives me crazy to have a (air) bed in the middle of my living room.
She's also going to stay with her mom on weekends. This gives DH and I some privacy and couples time.
Long term solutions are being tossed around, including purchasing a mobile home or large travel trailer that can be set up here on the farm.
I've also made it very clear that the younger SD that lives in town with her mother is no longer going to be welcome at my table if she doesn't learn to help clean up afterwards and plan to stick by it.
Thanks for the input. I really appreciate it.

 

[mamawolf544]

Quote:
If there is a will, I believe that legally it MUST go to probate. Sounds like a long story there.

You know it, I would have writer's cramp telling the story. I have been on her rear end for about 18 months to get things done. And she didn't and now she is in a huge mess, homeless, jobless and her house will probably get foreclosed on before the court date.

 

[Sonoran Silkies]

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Titled property (such as homes) is often handled separately; title by multiple persons can be held in a number of ways, and the relationship often determines what makes sense. Different states use slightly different terms, so you need to make sure yours is titles the way you want in in the state where the property is located.

Joint Tenant with Right of Survivorship means that both parties own the property, but if one dies, title is automatically transferred to the survivor; no probate is needed. Typically used when the parties are married and no other issues are involved. Tenants in Common means that all parties own the property, and if one dies their share is inherited according to their will or state law if there is no will; the property is included in probate. This is common when unrelated people own property together, when extended families own property together, when a married couple has children by previous marriages whose inheritance they wish to protect. Then there are various trusts that can also avoid probate.

 

[cafarmgirl]

You are absolutley NOT asking to much to expect some basic decency and common sense rules to be followed. It is YOUR house after all! Why anybody would even act this way in someone elses house is beyond me.

My husband and I have been married 21 years now and have yet to have an overnight house guest! I am sorry but we just cannot tolerate it. We have very few relatives and they live out of state. When somebody does come to visit, well, there are very nice, affordable hotels very close by. I am not a "people person" nor is my husband and at the end of the day I want to relax in the quiet privacy of my own home with my own family and not feel like I have to entertain or serve anybody. I also feel that visitors need to be able to get away and have their own place to relax and unwind and be as big a slob as they so desire!

 

[vonchick]

Be careful about letting anyone stay with you! We recently went through total Hell when we tried to help a couple get back on their feet by letting them stay with us for a month or two so they could minimize their expenses. The whole thing was so strange that I could write a book, but I'll just hit a few of the high points and keep it short. They arrived with 2 large moving truck loads of stuff which they unloaded underneath our carports, taking up all the space, moving our truck out, saying they'd take it all to storage units the next day. Only one tiny storage unit ever materialized, and our parking spot, my gardening work area and the place where we were about to start building our chicken coop were filled to the rafters with their belongings. They were both on unemployment and we had to work, so we couldn't watch them, big mistake. It was soon apparent that they weren't here for any short stay, and they literally took over the house. My things were moved to the farthest corners of the kitchen. I'm an artist and I offered to share studio space so the wife could set up her computer. They made room in part by moving my portfolio of new work to outside storage. All my husbands tools were moved from his workshop and put out in the weather to make room for the husband's things. Our stock of wood for building the chicken coop was cut up into little pieces to stack their junk on. And this is just a small part what went on! The end came when we learned that the husband had made extra room in the kitchen by throwing my things away. My husband lost his cool and chewed the guy out. Then the police came - the couple wanted to have my husband arrested for assault because he had yelled! The officer was very sympathetic to us and the couple left the same day under their own power. The officer told us how easily we had gotten off; that by letting them move in we had given them a lot of rights, and if they had wanted they could have stayed and made our lives miserable for a very very long time. They were with us 5 weeks, and I think I aged about 10 years! It took ages to clean up the mess, and a lot of our belongings are gone. We finally got new wood and built our chicken coop, though, and are busy falling in love with 7 little chickens. Pullets or roosters? It's anyone's guess, but that's a subject for another day's post.