It's official, I hate that dog.

[deb1]

This dog could make a great family pet, I bet. The boyfriend needs to think about what is best for his dog. Is it best for the animal that it acts wild with his gf and she resents it? No.

His behavior is only hurting himself and his pet. In fact, he isn't really showing love to his animal so much as being selfish.


Ask him if you can take the dog to an obedience class without the BF. It doesn't matter if the dog already knows how to walk on a leash or stay. The class is for you to learn to get the dog in control. Do as other people have suggested. Feed the dog, walk the dog, care for the dog etc.

But also, be aware how you are approaching your BF. Are you telling him that you hate his dog? Are you complaining nonstop instead of coming up with good suggestions about how you can get control of the dog? If so, your bf might be tuning you out because he thinks that you are making him choose between his dog and you.

 

[Bettacreek]

Quote:
Unfortunately, the dog isn't interested in playing. She barges in because she's jealous that the boyfriend is playing with the kids and not her. She does the same thing to the BF's brother and used to do the same with me. She gets to the point that she WILL bite if you keep playing with the kids. The dog is not discluded from the family, she goes with anybody who leaves the house, she plays with the guys, etc. She's a part of just about everything.

Anyways, thanks for all of the advice. Re-training has started. If she comes up and tries to squeeze between us, the dog is told to go away. Hopefully she'll soon understand that she cannot try to push me away.

As for people trying to say that the person would go first, I'd honestly wonder about the issue. I love my cat, had her for sixish years, but the boyfriend does NOT like cats, HATES them in fact. I rehomed her for his sake. It's called compromise, if something isn't working, you fix it. It was in the best interest for her and the boyfriend to rehome Kitty.

 

[aggieterpkatie]

Quote:
Wow. Sorry, but I view my pets as a commitment and not something to be given away if they're inconveniencing someone. I can see maybe if BF was allergic, but not just because he didn't like the cat.

 

[deb1]

I am not a cat lover but I knew that my husband was one when we married. So, I get dogs, he gets cats. That is how we compromised.

He is very good to my dogs and I tolerate our cats. Actually, we don't have a cat now but I feel bad for my hubby so we will eventually adopt one for him.

I have to admit, I have never understood how people could hate cats. I understand not really liking them but hating them? I just don't get that level of emotion over an animal species.

Surprsingly, I have come across a lot of people who hate cats. It seems illogical to me. Especially here in the south, I meet people who really, really passionately dislike felines to the point of hatred.

 

[Lady Catrina]

I agree with Deb1. I was always a cat person, but we got dogs when my hubby was still my bf. After we got married, he gave me a puppy. Well, Kodiak became a very loved, spoiled dog - and hubby got jealous, lol! I had told him, and he agreed, that the animals always came first - I jokingly told him that if I had to choose, I would choose Kodiak. With a dogs lifespan being shorter, I told Jim that he could come back into my life once Kodiak was gone. Jim is still here, Kodi is an old fart, and now Mystery is ALWAYS needing to be in the center of things.

Bottom line, while I advocate keeping the animals, remember that he is 'just' a BF.

<ducking from flying debri>. There has to be a compromise, and a retraining. Our Husky didn't like to listen to me, but he stepped back and let me be the disciplinarian for a while - now she knows he is more for playing with, and she darn well better listen to me when I 'give orders' lol. Basically, she knows her place in the pack.

 

[deb1]

I could see giving away a pet if the other person was:

Allergic

deathly afraid of the animal

felt the animal was out of control or wanted to attack them


Asking someone to give up a pet simply because you dislike the species sounds a bit controlling.

Was your cat attacking your BF?

If not then why did you have to give up your pet, but he doesn't have to give up his? No, I don't think that he should give up his dog.

Just curious about the answer.

 

[chickeypoo]

I didn't read many posts but i did read the one where you say that he needs training. BUT if you took her to a training class yourself she'd listen to you.. and then it wouldnt' matter what he says. I know they aren't that much. My hubby's pup that he got a few months ago decided that he woudl start not listening to me.. just all of a sudden. I quit taking him out to go pee and quit showing attention and now... he loves me.. lol. even my oldest DD was having problems too. but when we told DH that we werent' letting him out and he had to do it.. it's like the pooch took a hint and now he listens(plus it's zero out and even lower)
Good luck is all i can really say.
Sue

 

[Cara]

It seems like the typical stepchildren/other parent problem rather than a dog problem. He doesn't respect you enough to believe that his dog should. You can't be the 'parent' to the dog unless he allows it, and he doesn't seem to be taking the situation seriously.

 

[Bettacreek]

The cat was rehomed for several reasons. One of them being that the bf is not a cat person. He was willing to welcome (err, allow) her into the home. I decided that it was honestly best for the cat to be rehomed. When I moved from my apartment, I was staying with my mother for a short while. The cat came with me. They had three cats at the time, one of them being a cat that was mine from a very young age (the cat was threeish years younger than myself). I moved in with the boyfriend and hadn't moved the cat up yet when my other, older cat died of old age (she was 18 afterall). That's when my younger cat, Kitty, decided to take it upon herself to cram her head up my step-father's hindside. They took to each other and I decided that under the circumstances, it was best all around that she not move with me.

However, good news on the dog already. She's already listening to every thing I say. I took her outside and even played ball with her out in the snow. She listened so well that she brought the ball back, dropped it in my hand when told to do so, then sat and waited for me to toss it again. That's a huge step with her, she's not exactly fond of dropping the ball, not even for the bf. Hopefully we can keep things going this well. I will be able to actually like the dog again! When I had first moved in, my mother made fun of me about the dog. I was never much of a dog person (always prefering cats of course, lol), but anyways, with this dog, mom made fun of me, saying that I acted like this was the daughter I never had. She went EVERYWHERE with me. I even had special treats in the glovebox of my car for her. Hopefully we can get back to that again and actually enjoy each other.

 

[country freedom]

Quote:
Same thought that I had.