Kids say the darnedest things!

My little brother... the T.V. (we prenounce just like the 2 letters) used to be the "tivvy" It's hard to type the sound... Also he learned the B female-dog word, but learned it as "batch". It was so hard to get mad for foul language when it was so cutely messed-up.
 
I'm convinced my 5 year old niece is an evil genius. The other day she was helping to prepare food for lunch, dropped something on the floor, and returned it to the plate thinking that nobody would notice. My brother said "Hey, did you drop that?"
"No...."
"Oh, is that the story you're going to go with?"
She replied, "Yes, once upon a time there was a little girl who didn't drop anything on the floor."
 
A friend of mine has grown children. Apparently she was an impatient, and profanity-inclined, driver. One day a car sped by them at well above the speed limit. Her elementary-aged son turned to her & husband and said very matter-of-factly: "Wow. Look at that (edited - use your imagination) bottom go!"

My friend got in trouble, not her son!
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I'm expecting a new baby in August, and, though my 2 year old believes without any way to convince him otherwise that there's a baby living in my belly button, his four year old brother is too smart for that and has had to have a whole lecture on how a baby is in there (is it like hatching eggs, mom?) etc. etc.

The only way I could figure on explaining about where the baby was (in response to: how can he BREATHE??? Isn't he squished?) was that the baby is floating in a nice, warm swimming pool.

OK, problem solved. Months ago.

Then yesterday, I was mentioning that our cat looks like she's finally gaining weight and he says, matter-of-fact...

"Well, that's just because the haircut they gave her when they took her swimming pool out is long again."
 
All six of my children grew up pronouncing:
Cream of Wheat - Creamy Wheat
Oatmeal - Oakmilk
I still do not know why.

My fourth child (17 yr. old son), still pronounces those that way.
Until recently, he also would waggle his head every time you gave him anything on a spoon, like a very young baby when that baby is hungry.
 
Quote:
Oh that story is a keeper, and a perfect one to pull out (pardon the pun) with any girlfriend he ever has.

the ultimate torture!! poor kid!
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