mad as a wet hen and needing to vent

[welsummerchicks]

I think one possibility isn't being considered - that the goat wasn't sold back to the original owner because the buyer was already unhappy with the original owner! perhaps she dcided to sell the goat to someone else because she's angry about something the original owner did to HER, and the original owner doesn't have any idea what that thing might be! (hint- another secret rule).

Marshmallowman, I don't really believe most basic courtesy is hard to figure out. Please and thank you are easy things to say, and maybe not even so hard to really mean and be sincere about.

It's the more personal things that are hard to figure out. That's where the secret rules come in.

In most cases, things aren't really that hard.

HAT is polite, WHAT is appropriate, WHAT is fair in more complicated personal interactions? Just read a simple question about a family or couple issue on an internet bulletin board and read the diverse answers, and you'll find that there actually is very, very little agreement about these things that we 'take for granted' that we 'know the answer to'.

That's where the trouble starts - with each person having a very, very different idea about what is 'right' to do. The trouble gains steam when people don't communicate very clearly, what their idea about what is right to do actually really is!

Example. Lady says 'Please sell me that goat if you decide you don't want him any more'

Friend: 'Well I can't guarantee that. We're facing some financial problems, and will need to get whatever we can for the goats when the time comes'

'Well then I won't sell him to you'. ....OR....

'Well, I can understand that. I won't expect you to sell him to me'.

 

[WingingIt]

I mean no offense, but I think that you're overreacting a tiny bit because you're irritated with them. I do agree that it would have been the right thing for them to have called you (if they remembered the conversation) BUT, you saw Woody at the sale. He wasn't important enough for you to stay and bid on him or leave a bid on him, so I'm really finding it hard to believe that he was all that important to you. Sure you may have been outbid, but you didn't even try to buy him. I don't think it's about the chance to get him back or that they sold him so much as it's that you think they personally snubbed you by not calling.

I'm guessing, based on the economy all over right now, that they needed the money and either they forgot the first conversation or they were too embarassed to come to you and name a high price knowing you'd helped them get him at a good price to begin with and that they would feel like they were ripping you off by selling him back at a higher price. I don't need an answer to this, but think about if they had called you and named a high price because they absolutely have to sell him to buy groceries. Would you then be mad that they'd named a high price when you know they got him for a great price, because you're the one that sold/traded him to them? If so, then either way is a no win situation for them.

I do think, given the lack of phone call and your reaction to that, that now is the time to stop bartering/selling at a discount to them. If they want to purchase any more goats, sell them at full price with whatever contract you'd use to sell to a stranger.

 

[goatgirl4008]

I called talked to the folks the other evening. We talked and I told them how my feelings were hurt and she did apologize said that was not the intention. We visited a little while asked if I had done them wrong or anything and she said no that they appreciated all our help. So I hung up the phone with no hard feelings. I have a hard time holding a grudge. So if they call me again with a late night emergency I might think twice about going but I will probably still help the animal cause its the right thing to do. And you have to do what's right that is the way I was raised.

 

[MysticScorpio82]

Quote:

You did the right thing. I have trouble holding a grudge too

 

[Beekissed]