Funny story about nasty neighbors here. We had a real winner next door, too. Her pet peeve (pun intended) was to blame every pile of poo in her yard on my dog. Well. my Mom finally fixed her ... by raiding my crayon box! She ground up a bunch of yellow crayons and mixed them into the dog's food for a week or two.
The best part about it was that I got to watch it all unfold. When my mother told her friend across the street what she'd done, she and her daughter came over early every day for a week, in hopes of having entertainment over their morning coffee. They weren't disappointed!
The next time Neighbor-Lady called Mom out to "pick after your (expletive deleted) dog!" my mother calmly walked next door to inspect the offending evidence. They wandered the yard for some time, while Neighbor-Lady pointed out each and every pile. There were well over a dozen. Later, we all chuckled over the thought of Neighbor-Lady out there in the wee hours of sunlight, in her slippers and housecoat, mapping the locations as she planned her attack.
As the trek and head-shaking denials of "That's not from my dog," continued, Neighbor-Lady got madder and madder, eventually losing her cool and screaming "Of course it's yours! It's dog ($#!^) and it's from YOUR dog!" Mom calmly pointed out to Neighbor-Lady that it couldn't be from our dog, because the piles weren't yellow. They weren't even flecked with yellow.
The mix of anger, confusion and shut-down on Neighbor-Lady's face was priceless. She had no idea where my mother was coming from on that one, until Mom explained about the crayons.
You could almost watch the steam rising! Neighbor-Lady was SO mad that she just stood there in shock, speechless for a couple of looooong minutes. Then she turned and stormed back into her house. We didn't see her again for two days Afterwards, we'd see her every few days with a pooper scooper, angrily gathering piles and staring daggers at the back of our house, but she never said a word about our dog again. As a matter of fact, I don't think she said a word AT ALL for a few weeks, at least not to us. Blessed peace!
