My mom is dying *She's gone now **update*

Toni. you are an angel and mom knows it.you did what
was best and helped your Dad and your brothers. there is no blame for anyone.
God only takes the best.
We lost our only son to cancer.
all the chemo only helped to give more pain.It is hard to let go.
but mom knows all the good things you have done. Bless you
and your Brothers for being there for her and Dad.
Hold tight to the family,.It will help all of
you to cope with missing mom.
hugs.gif
and prayers.
 
My prayers are with you and your family. It is very hard to watch a loved on die.
I watched my father die from lung cancer on Dec 19, 2008, it was one of the hardest things that I have had to do in this life so far. It is very hard. This may sound bad, but I was very thankful for the day my father left this earth. He suffered so much during last few weeks, and I was so greatful when he passed, he suffered no more.
Spend as much time with your mom that you can. Sing her favorite song she will hear you. Hold her hand, she will feel the warmth. Tell her you love her.

Try not to argue in front of her with anyone she will hear, it just makes everyone upset. Anger will be there. I was angry when my father died, angry with everyone. It just made the hurt that much more. It was no ones fault my father died. It was his time to go. To this day I talk to my father, and I know that he is here with me, and laughing at the stuff I do. Just know that your mom will be there with you, she will see your children when you have them. I don't want to upset you at all. I just want you to know that it will be okay after the hurt, and the anger. It will all be okay.

You are in my prayers. I hope that I didn't upset you.
 
So now I just find out that he is not giving her all of her pain medicine..HE thinks she is sleeping to much and it because of the meds...no wonder the last 2 days she seems to be in more pain and need more meds...I just want to scream, then my husband yells at me for being on my dads case......I want to scream!!!!!
 
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Well just this past week he took of to take care of her. He won't go back until this is over, butI quit working back in August to take care of her. I also think he is upset because my mom want me to do things for her more so than him.
 
Would it be out of line to have the funeral director come in now to meet with your mom? She could then make her choices, sign on the bottom line and there would be no arguing.

I am so very sorry that this is happening. You both deserve better.

And, I hate to ruffle feathers but truly, if your Dad is witholding the prescribed dosage of medications....he is guilty of medical neglect. Have you considered Hospice help at this point? They might be a great support for you and for your mom.

(((hugs))) and Prayers.
 
Do not let your dad withhold her pain meds! He could be charged for neglect!

Hope things will settle down within a day or so! Emotions have been running pretty high right now and hope the family got enough sense to get over their pettiness and think about what your mother wants!
 
Hospice is coming, the nurses come every other day. He said he didn't realize that I was giving her other pain medicine in between the oxy doses so he thought she didn't need it
idunno.gif
. No one can talk to my mom she is just out of it. When my dad and I were arguing she told my brother to tell her what was going on quick before...... then she went back into staring. I know she is in between both worlds right now it just sucks. My dad and I are good and on the same page again hopefully for the duration now. She is getting so much worse.. tonight is my night to stay up with her I am so scared it will be the last...
 
I feel your pain. Little over a year ago, lost my dad then my mom. Just lean on family. Just do the best you can as there is no handbook (except Bible) on how to handle it, everyone handles it differently.
 
Goodluck and Love to your mother and yourself. The time is now that you must be the strongest you have ever been for yourself, your mother, and your family.
 

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