Need help - when do people REALLY become adults???

[chickensducks&agoose]

Being a grown up means going to work (or taking GOOD care of kids), showing up for things on time, thinking about others, not partying if you have other responsibilities, paying your own way, working hard at what you do, even if you hate it, being polite and respectful of others, and following at least 99% of the laws.

And as far as men go, the Airforce won't make you a man, only YOU can make yourself a man. My BIL is my age, but still lives at home, gets fed, etc. by his parents... he's not disabled or anything, he has a job, he just can't handle any responsibility besides mostly going to work... My DH, is as adult as he's ever going to get, at 35, but still is 12 inside... fart. hilarious.

 

[darkmatter]

For me, being an Adult was joining the Service at 17 (graduated High School of course) and taking Responsibity for myself and family I was to have. Paying for everything and only taking advice from my parents---helping them out when they needed it. Raising my Kids also to think for themselves---they both got higher education and full time jobs with benefits.
But still maintain a child-like wonder and interest in the world---I still like holding the fresh hatched day old chicks/keets. Growing a garden, hunting, fishing, and having a beer with friends while telling whoppers.

 

[Kelly G]

Guys, this is such good stuff!!!

I love it!

 

[PineappleMama]

*standing ovation* Kelly you nailed it.

It is better, for a child's sake, if this great event happens before they are born, but if not then at least get your crap together before they're old enough to remember it... that'd be my sister... ack... OR before you've completely drained your parents retirement and savings mooching off them while they pay for your rehab over and over until well after your 40th b-day... that'd be my BIL.

Oh yeah... STANDING ovation.

 

[chocolate m'scovy]

Great stuff! I don't believe in any "magic age" either. The age of responsibility varies with each individual.

 

[Wifezilla]

[ ] Pay for own cell
[ ] Buy your own food
[ ] Pay for housing and all housing related expenses such as gas, electric, water, trash pick up, repairs, etc...
[ ] Housing is separate and apart from your parents or grandparents home
[ ] Buy your own clothes
[ ] Pay for own health care
[ ] Provide for your own transportation either via car and insurance or public transportation
[ ] Have a job (at home mom counts as a job...sometimes 2 or 3 jobs LOL)
[ ] Understand that actions have consequences
[ ] Accept responsibility for your choices
[ ] Do not have the expectation that mom and/or dad will bail you out if things get tough
[ ] No longer do dumb things just to be liked
[ ] Have a sense of priorities (no, a new xbox or hair extensions do NOT come before rent)

When you can check off ALL of those items, you have a good start.

 

[adoptedbyachicken]

I would echo what has been said about putting true needs first, over your wants. Adulthood is realizing that selfishness will get you nowhere good. Denial that you are selfish is very immature, we all are to some extent. The mature ones acknowledge it and put aside their wants willingly.

Regardless of if it is a need of you own or another adulthood to me is showing that you know the difference between a need and a want and making sure all the needs are met before you spend resources, be it time or money on a want. Justifying your wants by trumping them up to look like a need is a sure sign of immaturity.

Want independence? Make yourself independent, don't have others paying your way, supporting the roof over your head, or helping out except to cheer you on, and make sure your successful most of the time. Then people will see you as independent. When others view you that way it's true, if your the only one that sees it your perception is wrong.

 

[Gonzo]

I love this thread!

 

[I have WHAT in my yard?]

Finally, People are really adults when they don't have to ask other people if they are!!!

 

[wegotchickens]

You're an adult when you know freedom isn't free.

It's not free financially.
It's not free of responsibility.
It's not free from duty to your country.