New problems, need to vent

[usbr]

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That is solid gold info, too bad you severed ties with people before you could get thier statement on tape. What your mother said to you about turning you in to SS would really hurt her case.

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Im sure you probally know this but it should be said anyway. This papertrail could really come back to haunt you if you were planning on getting custody of the children (and I believe that is what you want because you seem to object to the SIL getting custody of them). If your mother submits this email in court, you dont stand a snowballs chance in you know where as these statements are not the statements of a reasonable and rational person and a judge will be fearful of putting the kids in your custody because you may do the same with them that you are doing with yourself, you DH and your own children. In fact, its highly doubtful the judge would even see it as the GAL would weed you out as a possable home for the children. Im sure your lawyer already told you this but the rules when going to court are to never say anything that can be used against you and always leave the lines of comunication open with the other party so you can use what they say againts them. Of the 3 above rules, you broke 2 but can repair it somewhat by taking your mother off the blocked sender list. With her on the blocked list and her not talking to you, all 3 are effectivly broken.

Are you sure the GAL didnt represent the children dispite being on vacation? As you probally know, the system dont come to a screahing halt when one person leaves town, GALs here frequently type up a brief and recomendation on cases they dont actually personally attend. Unless you know the system, it can easily seem like the kids were unrepresented but even in the most backwards states, the judge wont be ruling without input from the GAL or the children, if not both. He may make a temp ruling but that gets reviewed at a later date and that sounds like what happened here due to the fast court date (the wheels of justace move slow is the old phrase). Final ruling would be in a couple weeks/months.

Sorry to hear of kids getting beat up like this. There is no excuse for domestic violence. I wish you still had visition rights with the boy as you could feed him all the steak and good food he could eat. Kids that age get blessed by mother nature with a thing called puberty and when well feed and in good endurence sports, they soon turn the tables on the abuser. I seen it happen many times with kids I went to school with.

 

[Patchofheaven]

Anymore news Alleyoop? Still praying for you and yours.
Dana

 

[M.J]

the situation really stinks but brings out the hero's. And god will not turn his back on you, your children, your husband, or susan and jeremy.

 

[Alleyoops25]

Yester day I got to talk to my Nephew. I called my parents house knowing my mom would be gone at work and hoping that my nephews were both over there. And luck had it and my nephew answered the phone because he was over there and my dad was in the bath room. He told me he is still having a hard time and everyone doesnt believe him. And that his Dad did show up the other day and he escaped through a window in a bed room and hide in a ditch bank until his dad gave up looking for him and left. He said that this is the first time he had any access to a phone and that everyone has been pratically not allowing him to do any thing unles they are standing on top of him and knowing he aint calling me or saying anything that would help put his dad away. I didnt get to talk with him long because my Dad was on top of it before to long. But I told him to hanf in there and that he needed to do his part by not caving in with all the pressure and to next time figure out how to get down the road to my friends house to get help when his dad shows up.
Usrb I didnt do any thing to hang myself with the emaili sent my mother. I was very carefully not to leave anything that could be used against me. In fact I made all their arguements defended on my side. like when they are trying to say that I am only out to get my brother because we hate each other. I put down on the email that I thought Our relation ship was getting better and that the girl friend was going to make a good mom to the kids. I also put down that I would have done the same be it any of my other brothers friends.
As far as me telling my mom to stay away and putting a block on her emails. Has done nothing except protecting my childern from the stress of my mom coming over and having a fit, or sending a email that my daughter could open up and read. My kids are important in this as well and I have to do what is best for them as well. And my mom's games wont help them feel any better. As for collecting evidence, all evidence to the crime has been collected, and S,S. services has already been calle dalong with the police. And they have all been out to my house and seen my living enviroment and talked to my kids. They also are goign to testify for us any way on the matter of custody and the abuse already so it doesnt bother them a bit to testify for me that everyone is full of crap. My Aunt in Denver is still trying to get her attorney and it is only going to be a few days before she is involed in the case as well. I have got ahold of the girl friends ex in Montana and told him that his duaghter is in Danger and that his ex has been arrested for child abuse as well and I sent him a statment and a bunch of documents to help him get his duaghter back where she is safe . But right now I am just collecting letters, and building on up my little army of people who are willing witnness's to the abuse and violence of my brother. So keep the prayers for Jeremy and Susan going they need all the prayers they can get. As for phone calls I did forgwet to mention above the I recorded the phone call between me and my nephew. and me and my dad. And I now have my dad on tape voicing his oppinion on the case and he has told me that I was doing right and we had a good discussion about what my mom and brother has said, and what he thougth needed to be done but also that he is to disabled to do anything but sit in his wheel chiar and watch, and that no one would listen to him, or take care of him if he were to try to help the kids and I out. So no I havent sevred all ties. I just have made less stress by not allowing my mom and brother to play any games with this. And that helps every body in the long run.

 

[wendy]

i did not get on the computer yesterday or late tuesday afternoon.
that is sad about your dad wanting to say and do more but he can't!
i am still thinking of you and your family. i pray everything works out for the best.

 

[SpottedCrow]

With the car accident and going out of state, I hadn't been on the computer much either...I am soo glad that you were able to talk to your nephew and that your dad backed you up.
Many hugs to the kids and to yourself...I think that the stress can speed up your disease some, so take a couple of minutes for yourself. Go sit with the chickens. Drink tea or read a book.

 

[Alleyoops25]

Sorry to here you were in a car accident Spotted Crow. Is every one alright? Yesterday I recieved some mail from the courts to my nephew. I accidently opend it not even thinking that there would be mail coming here for anyone else but my DH and I . It was a letter to tell him about his rights as a victim. And it also had information to get him a probono atterney since he was a minor and couldnt work. I am now trying to figure out how toget this to him. I could easily put a fowrading adress on it and send it it to my mom's or sister in laws adress. But the problem is I know he wouldnt get it. It would get put in the trash and never seen by him. And if by some miracle he did go out to get the mail and read the letter there is no way in hell they would let him fill it out and send it back in. I know a lot of you are thinking that things couldnt be this bad, and that I am over reacting. But every bit of it is true. As long as that boy is in the custody of my sister in law and near my mom, the kid wont be able to even go to the bathroom with out a detailed discription of what he was doing. And ya it would be illegal for them to not give him the letter,( and was illegal for me to open it) but unless he can get away and call the cops, and go through more battles with the courts. Nothing will come of it. I was told by my friend yesterday that my brother was out at my parents house at least. And he isnt supposed to come any where near the property. So if they are willing to break the restraining order what would stop them from this to? I wish I could talk to him agian that way I could ask him wether or not he wants it filled out. If he did I could fill it out for him and then send it in. It was also another heart renching day yesterday. We need to go to town and get some cement mix for the corner post of the chicken yard.
We also needed to get some groceries. So we went to Wal-mart which is right acrossed the road from Hme Depot. Any way we were in the craft department and I was getting some more embodery thread when I happend to look up and I seen my parents. My 4 yr old Ethan seen them also and was going to run over and give my mom a hug. And I told him no wait a minute, we need to find Daddy first. So I took him by the hand and went to the other side of the store to get my DH and got out of there. I told Ethan that we couldnt find them and that they must have left . I know I was lieing to him, and in my heart I my self wanted to get a hug by them. I wish that God didnt choose me to help Jeremy and Susan, I have been having a lot of tears shed over this. And I have a hard time breaking my every day routine of calling at noon, to talk to them, and then again at 5 or 6 in the evening. I did this about every day, even if I didnt have anything to really talk about , but to just let them know that I was there and that I loved them. And I think that this hurts worse than if one of them actually died. At least then I could let go, and then grieve. As it is right now, I do feel like they are dead. And I am greiving like they have died. But its worse because I end up face to face with them in the store. And It feels like rubbing salt in a open wound. I love my mom to death and I hate her at the same time. I love her because she is my mom, and when there isnt anything going wrong in my brothers life, she treats me with respect, and we even have a friend ship. But I hate her because I know that compared to my brother I am nothing to her, and I know that she will be out to "get even" with me for hurting her 35 year old baby boy.And she will never forgive me for having Erin when I was 16. And no I wasnt a good parent then. And no I am not the greast parent in the world now. But since I was 16 I have grown up a lot and I do every thing I can to protect and love my childern. And yet every time we get on to the topic of Dennis, (brother) She throws it in my face that I had a baby at 16. And it hurts even more that she would try to rip my family apart, by lying to protect Dennis. And she will sacrfice any of her grand kids to save him. I was doing better with the thoughts of everyone, especially my mom hating me for stoping my brother's abuse. But it just resufaced when I seen her yesterday. And she gave me this hateful look when we caught eyes. And then she turned her nose up and walked off. And it really hurt me to know that even if I didnt tell her I was sorry and that she could see my children, she would still hate me and that I would never be forgivin for some thing that wasnt my fualt to begin with. Its sad but I wish we had the money to move away from here. I have lived here my entire 25 years of life. And I never thought I would want to. But right now I would do it. Just so I would have to run into my mom at a store again, and I wouldnt have to bear the idea that if I did see her I wouldnt be able to be told that I am loved, and have approval from her. Any way I have been rambling now for ever and I am sure I put you all to sleep. And thanks Spotted crow, I have been out with my chickens trying to forget it. But I think I am annoying them, and they fluff up when they see me coming. I know they are saying, Oh great here comes the ball baby to pack us around and mess up our feathers. I know one especially hen doesnt like me petting, hugging and kissing on her. Because the second I put her down she spends hours groming her self and she acts like I gave her cooties

 

[chickiepoo]

Alleyoops, I don't know what to say, except my heart is breaking for you. I think that your nephew needs an attorney in addition to the guardian ad litem. Oh, do you know who the GAL is? You could take the mail to that person and let them give it to your nephew.

That is the best way I can think of to get the application for pro bono representation to him.

Then, if an attorney is appointed to him, you and your aunt can decide what the best representation is for him.

Thoughts and prayers are with you always.

 

[Alleyoops25]

Well here really soon we will be off at court. Please pray that we get the kids, or they go somewhere safe. Thanks and i will let you know how it goes.

 

[banditgin]

hoping you get them. good luck!!