New problems, need to vent

[EweSheep]

As my father in law whom he is now a retired warden from a maxi prison, he said that child abusers and child molestors will be "targeted" and they dont have it easy and yes, like missus said he would end up as someone's girlfriend in prison. He would not be "spared" by his prison inmates or "bunkmates".

I am not sure of the time he will be served for abusing his children...if it ends up a lifetime, all for the better! That shows he put a "lifetime" scars on those kids.

Hope you are holding up well and those kids are with you!

 

[fosterchick]

I am so glad that you stepped up for the children. Make sure that you fight for them and always put the first over your extended family. I understand your feeling on foster homes. They are not all good. I have been a foster parent for 8 years, and love every minute. After thing settle down and you know where the children will be forever or for a while, make sure that the children get couseling for this so that they won't repeat history. Also always remember that some of there behavior will stem from what they have been through and they might (most likely) try to push your buttons more then the normal. They will test. Some time children that have been though abuse will try to get you to abuse them because they (children) thinks this is love. You might have to reteach them love. If you need any advise please ask. I have 5 children of my own. 2 of them were abused by there birth parents and we adopted them 3 years ago. they are now 13 and 9. My other 3 children are bio-children ages 15, 10, and 7. Good luck and keep us posted.

 

[schmoo]

I just read this for the first time

I am so sorry this is happening in your family. You have done exactly the right things. I am praying for you all.

Its hard to imagine a Grandma NOT sticking up for her grandchildren - I'm so glad they have YOU!

 

[chickiepoo]

I just saw this also...How horrible! Yes, update, please!!! Here a judge will try to place a child with family if possible to avoid the foster care situation. How old is your niece? I know the nephew is 14. Here we also have a guardian ad litem program which appoints an attorney who is trained to interview the children and family members and speak on behalf of the child in court. The wishes of a child of 14 should be considered in his placement.
Great Scot! Thanks goodness you were available for him to confide in!

You have my greatest admiration for the way you have stepped in and tried to defend and protect these children. God will make a way, where there seems to be no way.

You might want to ask for some sort of police protection if he stays out of jail on bail.

Thoughts and prayers are with you.

 

[pattycake]

Oh, this is such a horrible situation!! Thank goodness your nephew had you to go to and that you are strong enough to do what's right. I'll be thinking of you and hoping the court does the right thing... You really are a hero.

 

[BeckyLa]

She must be really, really busy. Hopefully this waiting means she is busy buying clothes and stuff for her new kids. Oh, I hope so and I hope we hear something real soon.

 

[chickiepoo]

Ditto. That is what I am figuring. No news is good news. She is busy taking care of the kiddies.

 

[chickiepoo]

But, Please, please give us an update.

 

[Alleyoops25]

Well I am sorrry I havent been posting updates, Things have gotten even worse. My brother went back and has pled not guilty, and my nephew gardian ad litem went out of town so my neice and nephew were left at the mercy of the courts. The case worker that went to the hearing only knew about the case a half hour before he had to be there and had no time to read up on things and basically my nephew and niece were only a case number to me. When I told you they were at recess they came back and they never called me back until the judge had made his decission. THey granted my sister in law custody until next court hearing the 6th.

I went nutts on the case worker because he said that he didnt want to fight my brother and was interested in re estabilishing a relation ship with my brother and nephew. We had to give him up yesterday, we were supposed to be at the fair grounds and meet the case worker by 9:00 in the morning the moron should up 45 minutes early seen we werent standing there and decided that we probably werent going to show up. So he went to get a warrant out for my arrest, for kid napping. HE left us this message on our cell phone. SO when we got the message I called the sheriff's department and told them what had happend. THey told me that they were going to send a officer to talk to me. When the sheriff got there I saw that it was the same sheriff's that came when we called them. I was so happy I told them what had happend and that my sister in law live right next door to my mother and niether one would protect them from my niece and nephew. THey both agreed that he was in danger, and told us that they would go make some phone calls and see if they could do anything. they told me that I didnt need to worry about the s.s. worker and that they would tell him to take a hike, and that we were where were supposed to be. THey also told us that we were to to give my nephew up unless the guy had paper work to back it up. So while we were waiting for the sheriff's to help us, we had a nother call from the office the case worker was from they wanted me to wander around looking for a guy that was medium hieght and built, Brown hair, glasses and wearing a plaid shirt. I was like Are you kidding me, I am at a county fair fair, and were I was standing I could see about 8 men that could have fit that discription. I asked them if they could just call him and tell him where we were. THey told me that he didnt carry a cell phone and they had no way to talk to him. So we stood there about 30 minutes and here comes this short, nerdy looking little man wearing a shirt that was mustard yellow, and told me he was the case worker. I aske dhim if he had his paper work to show that I needed to hand over my nephew and he said he didnt and that if we were to fight him that he would call the cops. I told him that we alreadu did and they were the ones who told us not to release him without the paper work. So he stood there and stuttered and then asked if he could use our cell phone. HE took my DH's cellphone and started trying to walk off and hide to use it. I told my DH to stay by him since he had our cell phone and make sure he wasnt going to look at our numbers, and try to erase his message to me. Ther little twirp keep try to walk away and my DH just stuck beside him and finally he gave up and handed his cell phone back to my DH and told him he would use a pay phone. Not three minutes later we saw him standing clear out in the middle of the street with a cell phone stuck to his head when he got done with his phone call he put it back in his pocketun I wanted to go run him over with my carun WHat a liar. When the sheriff's came back they said that there wasnt much they could do until next week and they would take the Social worker and talk to him and make him relize the mistake he had made. After he figured out that I was in the right in our arguements and that the sheriff's were on my side he started trying to be polite and understanding. The sheriff's said that they would make sure they would set up and drive back in forth in front of my in laws house all the time and make sure that my nephew cant be touche dby his dad.

I was totally horrified that I had to giv ehim up to the same place he had done come from. I called aAunt over on the Eastern slope and told her the situation, and she is going to come over and help us fight the court battles. We are looking for a attorney and none of teh rest of my family knows that she is on my side right now. We are keeping it qiute si that they will talk to her and tell her what they are up to. They are right now trying to point fingers at me as being the abusive one and that my kids are the ones are in danger not my niece and nephew. They are going to try to hit me with this so that they will have a better chance of the judge not listening to me, and effectivly try to take credility away from me. So when we go to court they will think I and my DH will be fighting alone and they think they can get away with a lie. My Aunt will show up and then we will have them off their gaurd when they see that my Aunt is on my side and that we do in fact have a attorney. I am not a bit scared of their threats of hitting me with abuse. There timing can't be taken t heart by any one with the law. And I have not one thing in my life to hide from anyone. Since it's me and my Aunt that are the only ones that are willing to fight for my niece and nephew, we ae taking things out side our family. My brother is well known and I have a long list of people that I can call that will be very creditable, such as a land lord, that has witnessed the abuse of my niece and nephew and also seen animal abuse to. I have been having a lot of luck with this because he has made a lot of enemies, and there are a lot of people who are writting a letter for the judge, and several of them are going to also just show up in court and are willing to testify. So I am seceretly building a small army to protect those kids. I promised my nephew that I wasnt going to give up, and even though he cant be with me right now I am going to have his back. ANd I am not going to tuck my tail under my legs and run with all the threats from my mom. As a matter of a fact I talked to her the other day , and she her self told me that if I was still going to go agianst my brother in court she would hit me with child abuse also. I told her that if she honestly thought that I was abusive she needed to call and turn me in. I have nothing to hide and I am not scared for her, or my brother and his girl friend. I also told her that since she was willing to sacrifice her grandkids and myself to protect my brother, I had no use for her in my life, and that she was worth less to me than a postage stamp. I told her to stay away from me, my kids, my DH. Not to call not to come, just stay away. And the last time she will she me is the day I beat her and my brother in court. i will post you all pictures of the damage in a little while.

 

[Zenbirder]

If I understand correctly, a 14 year old can speak in court about the situation and where he wants to be. Is there some way you can let him know that he needs to be strong and tell a judge exactly what he feels would be best for him? Can you ask the officers to check on him and ask the officers to let him know that he can voice his opinion? Please some of you others out there who know more than I chime in on this. There should be some way to get the kid safe.